• Tue. Dec 5th, 2023

Children who dare not interact often lack this kind of emotion

There is a very serious uncle in my family. Children would run away from him because he always had a straight face. So when I take my son to his house, I always tell him: \”Don\’t be too noisy! Grandpa likes to be quiet.\” This time I went home to visit the tomb during the Qingming holiday, and we all stayed together for a few days. Unexpectedly, my son played very well with him. Once when we went to a hot spring, my son walked with us to the main road. He went back to call his uncle, hoping to take him with him. In just a few days, he easily took care of my great-uncle, which really impressed me. If you think about it carefully, the little guy really has a solution. She didn\’t make any noise or fuss, but she often went to talk to him, asking questions about this and that, acting coquettishly and cutely, and gradually she got close to him. You can also feel generous when visiting other relatives\’ homes. I don\’t have to worry too much about relationships. So what should I do when a mother mentions to me that her child is very courageous at home, but when he goes outside, he doesn’t say hello to others and becomes timid? It is necessary to see if the child lacks this kind of emotion – social emotion. In fact, both adults and children will have a desire to connect with others. In the process of interacting with people, find your own value and realize your own value. We humans cannot evolve to what we are today without this kind of social emotion. The best stage for cultivating a person\’s social emotions is the early childhood stage, because at this stage children grow slowly and are more naturally dependent on other people. In life, we will find that many children of single parents or left-behind children behave more lonely. Because children\’s social and emotional cultivation cannot be separated from the family environment. Children\’s social communication skills begin to form in the family. So I will often encourage my children to get along with their elders. For example, play crazy games with your uncle, and tell stories with your aunt. Parents must dare to let go and let their children try to interact on their own. When your child waves to his relatives for the first time, you should actively help him establish a connection. Then leave it to the children to communicate and express themselves. When a child greets someone in his or her own ambiguous language, do not interrupt him or speak on his behalf. Many children who say bad things are children who are doted on by their parents, because their parents have already prepared everything before they can say anything. What seems like perfect love is actually not conducive to children mastering language. Children should be encouraged to use their abilities and express their ideas. Even if they speak slowly and have to say a long sentence in sections, wait patiently for them to finish. I remember that at the beginning my son spoke in short sentences, and we were all anxious to listen. But I still let them speak slowly. Now he can use long sentences easily and sometimes use some idioms and refrains. This is also closely related to his usual reading, so we must insist on parent-child reading for our children. The use of some modal particles allows him to express his emotions. These words are acquired through daily conversations with parents. So, talk to your children well. And talk more. There is a kind of parent who finds fault with their children all the time. It seems that the child is not satisfied no matter what he does. result childYou will feel inferior to others, and you will feel inferior even as an adult. For example, we Chinese take the matter of greeting children very seriously. Are we really in such a hurry? Take, for example, the relationship between my son and his serious great-uncle. When we first met, I would remind my son, \”Come on, this is great-uncle, my father\’s uncle. Please call me great-uncle.\” My son glanced at that serious face and was not happy to call him. I couldn\’t rush him, so I looked for a way to talk to the elders to resolve the embarrassment at the time. Because I know my son needs time. But after a few days, we got to know each other well, and we were calling each other like aunt and uncle every day. We need to give our children time, and we need to understand them more. Because many children are slow to warm up or have introverted personalities. I remember one time I met my neighbor taking his daughter out in the elevator. The little girl lowered her head shyly when she saw us. But at this time, the enthusiastic neighbors greeted her and asked her to call her uncle and aunt. The child\’s head was lower. At this time, the neighbor shouted loudly, \”Why don\’t you scream? I taught you how to do it. You have no manners!\” Then he smiled at us. I think she cares about her own face, not her children\’s feelings. Too many parents want their children to be generous and sweet. But for such a child, the more you force him to say hello, the more disgusted she will feel about it. Over time, children become even more afraid to interact with strangers. Parents should also respect the characteristics of their developmental stages when educating their children. Never give your child the label of being \”impolite\”. Don\’t force your children to interact according to the pattern arranged by adults. Because doing so will only make the child withdraw even more. And your understanding and help, plus your patience in waiting. One day, you will be surprised by your child\’s progress. Children who are satisfied with themselves can integrate into the group more confidently. Children will develop self-awareness at the age of 1-2 years. They will have a sense of property rights, and they will feel that this is mine, and they will tell you \”I can\’t take it, I won\’t give it to you.\” But don\’t underestimate this stage, because dating is not about flattering, but being polite and courteous. This foundation is \”having oneself\”. In fact, children\’s attention to property rights is when they begin to pay attention to the differences between themselves and others. Independence and autonomy often begin to sprout at this time. If parents do not understand their children\’s behavior, they will think that their children are selfish and unreasonable. Instead, force the child to obey. When a child desperately grabs his own toy and doesn\’t want to give it to another child to play with. Some mothers must force their children to share out of love. He snatched it away abruptly and allowed the child to cry. Can this train children\’s sense of sharing? It is absolutely impossible that children who have never been satisfied will never take the initiative to share. On the contrary, it makes children have a vague sense of themselves and live in the eyes of others throughout their lives. Of course, in relationships, people who don’t know how to share are often not accepted. We would still like to see a generous child. Then first cultivate the child\’s sense of security and let him know that his things will not be taken away, but will only be temporarily controlled by other children. In addition, parents\’ behavior often has a great impact on their children. For example, when our family eats fruit, I usually don’t eat it alone.One, but separate a little for each person. This is not to be stingy, but to let the children experience the feeling of everyone eating together. And when a child doesn\’t want to share, I won\’t force him. It is to divert their attention. In fact, when children are in a good mood, they are usually willing to share some things with other children. It\’s just that many times, children will fight for the same item at the same time and cause conflicts. Therefore, parents should observe more and understand their children\’s behavior. Generally, by the time a child reaches the age of 5, some social and emotional patterns will be basically fixed. Before this, we must work hard to cultivate children\’s social emotions. In this way, after the children leave home, whether they are going to school or working. Parents don\’t have to worry so much, and their children will be more popular. Your marriage and family will be much happier in the future.

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