• Tue. Dec 5th, 2023

Dad, determines the temperature of a home

Every time I write about family. There are often messages from mothers, \”Where is dad? Fish dad, you have to work hard to arouse dads\’ attention to the family.\” \”You have to remind dads to work hard to grow up, and don\’t want their wives to grow up. He is still ready to be his own middle-aged greasy man. \”In many mother groups, mothers call their husbands \”pig teammates.\” Some are helpless, some are joking. Mixed with expectations and disappointments. What role does dad play? Most dads become dads in a panic. Before the child lands, he may be full of expectations. But when I saw that delicate little life in my hands. The tension inside can be imagined. A lucky wife will receive attentive care from her husband. The ignorant new parents supported each other and started an unusual journey. I remember that at the beginning, my wife was much more cautious than I was and didn’t dare to change the baby’s diaper because I didn’t know how to hold the baby’s shaking head. So, I bravely tried to change the baby\’s diaper carefully. Later, we started to learn to bathe our son together. Because someone has to support and wash the baby. People who have never done these things will never know that doing these things alone is a kind of torture. Therefore, every mother is eager for someone to help. It would be better if there are elderly people at home to help. But the old man can only help take care of daily life. In their hearts, mothers yearn for the company of their husbands. Because the husband\’s participation plays a much greater psychological role than that of the elderly. At any time, you must remember to take good care of the mother\’s psychology. Especially when they first become mothers, the inner pressure of mothers is much greater than that of fathers. Not only do they have to breastfeed, they also have to take care of their children at all times. A real mother is available 24 hours a day, day and night. How can a father like this do it? According to psychologist Winnicott, fathers should be mothers’ protectors and caregivers. It is precisely because of the protection of the father that the mother can develop a close relationship with the baby. Therefore, father determines mother\’s happiness and the temperature of a home. One of dad\’s core functions is to make mom happy. Winnicott mentioned: A father is needed in the family to make the mother feel physically comfortable and to move her soul to happiness. Every child is very sensitive to the relationship between his parents. We will find many problem children. In fact, the root of the problem lies in the family. If the relationship between parents is warm and sweet. The child will feel it and tell himself from the bottom of his heart to work hard and maintain this relationship. You cannot cause tension between your parents because of your own inappropriate behavior. But once the relationship between parents becomes cold and stiff. That child will not receive love. They can become confused, suspicious, and irritable. Because an insecure family environment will only make children more aggressive and destructive. He couldn\’t find a better way to express his dissatisfaction and loss. Once, a friend\’s son ran away from home. The child, who is only 10 years old, has already skipped school many times. Some people say that children are ignorant. But we know that this child was very good before. But ever since she found out her husband was cheating on her, the couple had been quarreling constantly, and finally said they wanted a divorce. The child becomesLike this. An unworthy man destroyed a family with his own hands. I remember there was an Indian movie \”Mysterious Superstar\”. The part that relieved me the most was at the airport. The violent, ruthless and arrogant father was dumped at the airport, and the young protagonist and his mother resolutely left him. When his daughter persuaded her mother to divorce him. The mother said she would not divorce, but the father just had a bad temper. But in the end, his attitude towards his daughter made this brave mother completely despair. The decision to divorce was made. At that time, the man who had punched and kicked his wife at every turn for a long time and smashed his daughter\’s dreams to pieces was completely confused. I could only carry 10 big boxes and push my elderly aunt to work abroad. I really can’t imagine how he would live? But I think the rest of his life will be filled with regret and reflection. But is there any regret medicine in the world? Dad has his place in the family and is irreplaceable. Every parent must understand that the role of a father is indispensable and irreplaceable. Unfortunately, there are many people who don’t think so. I remember once hearing a few old people chatting in the community. \”Men have to do their careers, so how can they have time to take care of their children?\” \”My wife blames her husband for not spending time with the children, and she doesn\’t look at how tired my son is every day.\” \”That\’s right! Just leave the children to us. .” This is the true thinking of many people, saying that “men are the masters of the outside world and women are the masters of the home”, and this has been passed down for many years. The men should go out to work, and the children should be left to the elderly and women. So some men feel great after making a little money. Treat your wife like a nanny and treat yourself like an uncle. Do not do housework at home and do not enter the kitchen. A phone call came from outside, and he immediately ran away huffing and puffing. After several phone calls, there is always a reason not to go home. In fact, do housework at home and cook delicious meals for your family. When the wife is too busy, she can help the children take a bath or hold the clothes to dry. You will find that it is actually quite good, and it can also put your wife in a good mood. Moreover, you must understand that the growth of a child requires the participation of the father. Dad is better at many things. Every smart mother must remember to take advantage of fathers’ strengths. Create opportunities for fathers to participate in their children’s growth. Generally speaking, the roles of fathers are as follows: They greatly enrich the world of their children. Carefree fathers are the best candidates to take their children to explore the world. For example, when playing physical games, what child doesn’t like to climb higher on his dad? Moreover, fathers’ participation in their children’s games will bring many new feelings. There will also be more perspectives and gameplay. And some dads are good at making things. Then take your children to do some crafts or repair something. These are very rich life experiences. Help children establish a sense of rules. Once a mother asked me how to make children behave. I always talk about the role of dad. In fact, in many families, the mother is the authority, while the father does not care. Such authority cannot last long. Because as children grow, different problems will arise. They will rebel and question the rules set by their mothers. If dad was involved. ThenI can help my mother speak up and maintain the rules together. And let the children know that the rules set by the mother are supported by the father. Moreover, when enforcing the rules, dad\’s serious expression is much more effective than mom\’s nagging. I leave this matter to my father, because my mother loves beauty, so don’t always have a straight face, which will cause wrinkles easily. Some good qualities in a father can point the way for his children. Children always have the shadow of their parents on them. And the father can better point out the direction for the boy\’s growth. They need to see their own identity from their father, and they need to imitate their father\’s behavior in order to grow into men. So my son often imitates typing with a paper computer toy. Because he saw me coding. Sometimes I find it funny when I see his serious look. He would also arrange his own work and then imitate the dialogue. For example, he would say: \”Oh! There is so much work, but I still have to work hard to finish it!\” \”Don\’t worry, I will definitely finish writing this article today.\” In fact, these are what he usually hears and sees from me. Under the influence of his ears and eyes, it turned into his behavior. Both boys and girls yearn for the intimate love of their father. So no matter what, dads must remember to keep their hearts at home. Don’t always say that women determine the temperature and happiness of the home. Because without a good husband, all this is almost impossible. Love your wife and children well. Home should be the best career in your life.

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