If you ask parents what worries their children the most during the holidays, laziness, procrastination, disengagement, and unplanned study will definitely be on the list. A few days before the holidays are often the time when parent-child relationships are at their most harmonious. Now that the summer vacation has passed for a month, many parents have begun to dislike their children in various ways. There are mothers around me who complain that their children are out of control when they stay at home. Apart from eating, sleeping, and playing games, they have basically nothing else to do. Their children rarely read books, exercise, or complete summer plans on their own initiative. In today’s article, let’s talk to you: How can we make children more conscious during the holidays? Children\’s self-consciousness during the holidays is not caused by urging. In life, many children are not unconscious but are urged too much by adults, which makes them develop strong resistance and destroys their initiative. For example, many children will prepare plans with great enthusiasm before the vacation begins. However, when they are implemented, they always encounter parents urging them: \”What time is it, and you haven\’t started yet?\” \”Say yes?\” I have to go swimming today, why don\’t you move?\” Some children will think: I can obviously do it myself, but if you push me, I won\’t be happy. In psychology, human motivation is divided into \”intrinsic motivation\” and \”extrinsic motivation\”. Intrinsic motivation is when we act spontaneously because we are interested in it or think it is valuable; extrinsic motivation is when we perform a certain behavior because of external reasons, such as urging and rewards. There is a magical power in urging, which unknowingly changes the child\’s \”intrinsic motivation\” into \”extrinsic motivation\”. Therefore, when it comes to cultivating children\’s consciousness, parents should not rely too much on the \”urge\” method. Always urging children to do something is likely to have the opposite effect. The full text of the Three Character Classic is read aloud, the children\’s version of Chinese classics is recited and downloaded as mp3. Self-awareness during the holidays relies on \”cultivation\”. The first step: communication. Talk openly and honestly with your children during the holidays, both about study and play. This step is not only to understand the child\’s thoughts, show your tolerance and understanding, but also to enhance the child\’s initiative. There are about 20 days left in the vacation. Combine your expectations with your children\’s ideas to develop a feasible plan for combining work and rest. The so-called \”feasible\” means that the goal should not be set too big or too difficult, otherwise the child will easily become obsessed with it for three minutes. You might as well chat with your child before going to bed every day to check the results of today\’s plan. If the child does not achieve it, don\’t blame him too much. Encourage the child to continue working hard the next day and talk about how long he will play and how long he will study tomorrow. Step Two: Appropriate Supervision Mechanism Whether it is young people or children, only a very small number of people can truly achieve self-awareness. In fact, parents can think of themselves as their children\’s counselors. Good consultants will not force clients to make changes, because they know that \”making changes\” is essentially the client\’s own business. We must also have this \”consultant mentality\” when dealing with children. It is neither authoritarian nor completely laissez-faire. Parents work with their children, treat them as independent people, and provide guidance and emotional support behind them. This is what we Often referred to as authoritative parenting. To put it simply, authoritative parenting not only has high demands on children, but is also highly accepting of children’s feelings and emotions.. If the child is young and has poor self-discipline, we can read a book with the child in the early stage (try not to browse the phone), accompany but not stare at the child, and let the child complete the summer plan by himself. Step 3: Minimize the loss of children\’s willpower. Willpower means that a person consciously determines his purpose, controls and regulates his actions according to the purpose, and overcomes various difficulties. The truth is, willpower is a limited resource. There is a famous carrot experiment: two groups of hungry college students walked into the same laboratory. One group had freshly baked chocolate chip cookies in front of them, and the other group had carrots in front of them. The students in the carrot group could only smell the fragrance of the cookies and eat tasteless carrot slices; while the students in the cookie group could happily eat the cookies. After the students finished eating, they began to work on an unsolvable math problem at the same time. As a result, the students in the cookie group persisted for 20 minutes, while the students in the carrot group gave up after 8 minutes. This story tells us that human willpower is limited. It is like a muscle and will tire after use. We should find ways to help children reduce the loss of willpower and use their precious willpower on the most important things. Let your children be more self-disciplined, put first what they do, and don’t ask for too much every day. When supervising your children\’s studies during the holidays, don\’t overschedule them too much. You must consider the loss of willpower and make targeted decisions based on your children\’s performance. Second, keep children away from sources of interference and temptation to reduce distractions. Children always want to play games. Before completing their homework, simply don’t let them appear around them. Children love to read comic books, so comic books should not be placed on the desk where they usually do homework. When studying, keep snacks and fruits as far away from the child’s sight as possible. …..Many temptations will unknowingly distract children. Trying to provide children with a safe learning environment can also effectively reduce the loss of children’s willpower. Third, develop good habits. Self-discipline and self-consciousness itself are the embodiment of good habits. We should regard habits as the foundation of children\’s learning career. The main task in primary school is to \”lay a good foundation\”, such as going to bed early and getting up early, previewing and reviewing, and doing homework within a fixed time. Once these habits are developed, parents generally no longer have to worry about their children learning unconsciously. Fourth, exercise more. Exercise can increase children\’s concentration and make them less easily distracted when doing something. It is very difficult to cultivate children\’s self-consciousness. Before the child\’s good habits are finalized, the parents need to put in even more effort than the child. But it\’s all worth it. After developing good habits in childhood, we can gain a better and more self-disciplined child in the future.