• Wed. Dec 6th, 2023

\”Mom, why don\’t you adults study?\”

Her daughter is about to go to school, and even though she is a Buddhist mother, she cannot remain calm. Kindergarten has graduated, and messages are coming from the kindergarten parent group that most of my daughter’s classmates have entered kindergarten transition classes and started elementary school life early. In line with the attitude of being responsible for my children, I solemnly told my daughter that you must study. However, the road to learning is extremely bumpy. On the second day after graduation, I went home and cooked a meal. While feeding my second child, I said to the oldest: \”After dinner, we are going to start studying.\” My daughter replied: \”Mom, I\’m sleepy. I didn\’t sleep during the day.\” I said : \”It\’s only what time do I go to bed? It\’s not dark yet.\” She replied: \”I\’m really sleepy.\” As a result, five minutes later, she had fallen asleep. When I went to work the next morning, she was still awake. The next day, I didn’t mention studying in advance, and my daughter didn’t mention that she was sleepy. After finishing the meal, I cleaned up everything and gave them both a bath. I said: \”Now we start to study.\” Just as I was about to take out the book, the second child got a little sleepy and started to hum. What to do? If you don\’t turn off the light, the second child won\’t be able to sleep. After turning off the light and putting the second child to sleep, I turned on the light and the eldest child was already asleep. On the third day, the boss didn\’t sleep. I was bored in the afternoon, so I slept with my second child all afternoon. At night, his eyes shine brightly. While I was still eating, she said: \”Can you play with me for a while after dinner?\” I replied: \”You can play for a while after studying.\” Finally started, took out the reading book, and she Start reading sentence by sentence. After reading about half a page, she raised her head and asked, \”Mom, why don\’t you adults study?\” I said, \”Who said adults don\’t have to study?\” She said, \”That\’s right, I\’m the only one who studies, neither you nor dad do. To study, you can either play with your brother or look at your mobile phone.\” My brain was running rapidly, how should I answer her question about adults not studying? Turning my head, I saw the row of books on the bedside. I said to my daughter: \”Who says mom doesn\’t study? Mom is an adult and has many things to do, so she doesn\’t always have time to study. You see, mom has so many books that she waits for you to read after you and your brother go to bed. Mom has been studying too.\” The daughter said \”Oh\” and continued to read her book. I breathed a sigh of relief in my heart, and finally got through it for the time being. It’s true that I mostly buy books, but reading after my children go to bed seems like a thing of the last century. Since I gave birth to my second child, apart from reading a few books during maternity leave, I have basically not read much since I started working. At this time, I was preparing to move, and the father asked: \”What should you do with these books?\” I said: \”Does that need to be said? Of course, we have to move. These are priceless treasures left to our two children. Can we become a scholarly family? Third, it\’s all up to me.\” The child\’s father curled his lips, noncommittal. When I moved last time, he brought me these books in boxes. In the past three years, he bought a lot more and had to move them out. This is the heaviest item to move. It is said that when I was a child, I was addicted to books. When I was a few years old, other children wanted to buy food, but I was clamoring to buy books. Of course, these are all said by the elders and may be exaggerated. I don’t know if my two children will like reading as much as I do in the future, but I will always create an atmosphere for them. Reading to my daughter every night,I persisted for two years, but stopped because of the birth of my second child. At first, my daughter would pester me to read to her, but now she is used to not reading at night. I have always blamed myself for this. Now that the second child is older, reading can be picked up again. Reading to the second child together is the key task in the next stage. Of course, I will also start reading my own book. Every one of us parents has unlimited expectations for the future of our children. We want to do our best to provide them with the best, enroll them in various training classes, and attend various online courses. After finishing the course, I wish my children could take off at the starting line. We do our best to educate our children, but we often neglect to educate ourselves. It wasn\’t until the child asked one day: \”Mom, why don\’t you study?\” that I suddenly woke up. Perhaps, no matter how many tutoring classes you give your children, it is better to set yourself as a role model for continuous learning. Last year, the words of Xiong Xuangang, the top scorer in the Beijing College Entrance Examination, touched the hearts of many parents. \”My parents are diplomats. How should I put it? They have created a good family atmosphere for me since I was a child, including the cultivation of my study habits and personality. This is because I have laid a better foundation for every step. It is reliable, so it will naturally fall into place in the end.\” How the child learns in the end depends not only on the child, but also on the parent. I was listening to Gao Xiaosong\’s \”Xiao Shuo\” on my way to work recently and found it very interesting, so I went to look up Gao Xiaosong. You won’t know if you don’t check, but you’ll be shocked if you check. Grandpa Gao Xiaosong is the president of Tsinghua University, and his grandfather is the founder of Shenzhen University, an academician of the Chinese Academy of Engineering and the Academy of Sciences, and a scientist who is fluent in four languages; his parents are both professors at Tsinghua, and his mother is a student of Liang Sicheng…etc., he grew up Growing up in a two-story building on the Tsinghua campus had an important impact on his life. Those high-level parents have seen the world and have a broad vision, and do not place all their hopes on their children. They are relatively relaxed in their children\’s education, focusing on the cultivation of comprehensive qualities rather than just grades and scores. Children who grow up in such an environment not only fail to become nerds, but also excel in all aspects. Their parents are their best role models. As a parent, in addition to putting pressure on your children, you also have to think about how to put pressure on yourself. Sometimes, your children will be like you, whether you want to admit it or not. Every time I think about this, I dare not live like a trivial middle-aged woman. Even if there is a little hope, give it a try. Because we are also the hope of our children.

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