There is a term for families that often attack their children: \”excellent people with low self-esteem.\” Such people are undoubtedly excellent and successful in the eyes of others, but deep down they hide an inferiority complex and often deny themselves. Jiang Wen is such an \”excellent person with low self-esteem\”. Jiang Wen is a famous director and actor, winner of Golden Rooster and Hundred Flowers Best Actors, Taiwan Golden Horse Award for Best Director, has a happy family and is successful. Jiang Wen, who may be regarded as a \”winner in life\” in the eyes of outsiders, said in an interview that he is a very unconfident person. And this lack of confidence has a lot to do with his mother. Jiang Wen told two small things. One was that he was admitted to the Chinese Opera and told his mother excitedly. Her mother threw the notice aside and asked him to wash clothes. Later, he became famous, made money, and bought a house for his mother, but her mother never lived in it. Since childhood, Jiang Wen has been trying to please his mother, hoping to gain her approval. But until his mother passed away, neither of them had a chance to reconcile, which became Jiang Wen\’s lifelong regret. Percussive education is like a nail driven into a child\’s heart. As time goes by, the wound will slowly heal, but the rust on the nail will always remain. If parents can\’t even see their child\’s shining points and will only attack him and deny him, then where else can the child build up his self-confidence? An Overly Frugal Family My high school roommate Yunyun is 32 years old and has never had a boyfriend. The family is going crazy. In fact, Yunyun has had many kisses, but every time they ended in failure, the main reason was her inferiority complex. Yunyun\’s mother is a very frugal woman. Yunyun never wore new clothes when she was a child. Her clothes were either small ones worn by her brothers and sisters, or old clothes bought by her mother from relatives. When she was in the fifth grade of elementary school, Yunyun was selected by her teacher to represent the whole class in a performance on Children\’s Day. The teacher also specially told Yunyun to dress beautifully on that day. Yunyun returned home and told her mother about it. Her mother said, \”Just stand on the stage for two minutes. What are you spending this money on? Just wear your sister\’s dress!\” Although her sister\’s dress was of an old style and the collar was There were still a few yellow spots that couldn\’t be washed away, but Yunyun still had the courage to wear them. Yunyun said: \”She will never forget the way the teacher looked at her and the ridicule of her classmates.\” Although Yunyun now makes money from work, she can buy the clothes she likes. However, she still has low self-esteem. Every time she goes on a blind date, she always feels like the other person is laughing at her. Those who have a crush on them dare not take a step forward because they feel that they are not worthy of the other person… Some people say, \”Raising a child poor allows him to endure more hardships in childhood and cultivate strong perseverance and unyielding character.\” However, since childhood, Without the right to control money, not only is it easy to develop a low self-esteem character, but it is also possible to go down a wrong path due to excessive desire for money. \”Domestic violence\” in violent families, whether it is between husband and wife or between parents and children, will cause changes in the child\’s personality. A survey was conducted in the United States and found that children who have been exposed to domestic violence for a long time will develop two extreme personalities. One is to become a perpetrator and take out the pain on the victim.Harm others and find a sense of security in the fearful eyes of others. The other kind will produce a serious inferiority complex. Such children have been in fear for a long time and have the shadow of childhood violence. They will unconsciously feel fear when they think about it. After growing up and working, when faced with an opponent who is stronger than myself, the first thing that comes to mind is to retreat. When getting along with others, because of his cowardice and low self-esteem, he is often bullied by his colleagues but does not dare to resist. At work, he often does not have outstanding performance. Families that lack companionship I have a friend who is a middle school teacher. She told me the story of a boy in her class. The boy is in the first grade of junior high school. He is very withdrawn and always keeps to himself. One night, the hospital suddenly called her and told her that the boy had acute appendicitis and needed surgery, but the hospital could not contact his parents. The friend hurriedly ran over and signed the name before sending the boy to the operating room. The boy woke up and couldn\’t help crying when he saw the teacher beside the hospital bed. He said that his parents are very busy and have been doing business in other places. They have not been home for two months. When he comes home every day, he either makes instant noodles or orders takeout, and no one knows he is feeling unwell. Maybe, I am not important to my parents at all. My friend was very sad after hearing this. It turned out that this young man became so withdrawn and had low self-esteem because he lacked the company of his parents. If parents accompany them too little, children will not only lose their sense of security, but also become timid because there is no one to comfort and encourage them in time. Over time, they will give up on themselves or become inferior. We always feel that our children are still young and there is always time to make up for it. I never thought that my childhood would fly by in a flash. When we wanted to spend time with our child, we suddenly discovered that he had grown up. So, while you still have time, spend more time with your children. A child\’s character needs guidance from his parents. Don\’t let your child live in the shadow of low self-esteem all his life because of your mistakes. A family with love and companionship will cultivate optimistic and confident children.