• Sat. Dec 9th, 2023

The lack of psychological nutrition in childhood can take a lifetime and be difficult to recover.

Recently, many friends are following the drama \”In the Name of the People\”. I also watched a few episodes and was shocked by Zhao Dehan at the beginning. He clearly remembered the amount of bribes he accepted – 239,995,400 yuan! What\’s even more surprising is that when he faced a refrigerator full of RMB, he actually said the following words: \”I\’m scared of being poor\”, \”I don\’t dare to spend a penny\”, \”I\’m sitting here looking at this money.\” , just like when I was a child, looking at the crops that were about to be harvested in the field.\” It makes people dumbfounded. But it’s really worth thinking about. Because people are really like this, something they seriously lacked when they were young. If you do not receive proper psychological guidance, you will work harder to compensate when you grow up. Today\’s children seem to lack everything, but they often lack-psychological nutrition. Parents don’t have to be wealthy, but they must pay attention to their children’s inner world. It is crucial to pay attention to psychological growth and guide the development of children\’s values. Because what kind of love and education parents give their children in childhood will affect the child\’s life. Just like they need physical nourishment, children need psychological nourishment. The first important psychological nourishment is respect. It can be said that without respect, children cannot build a healthy inner world. It can make children feel inferior and even give up on themselves. I remember the last time I drove back from my hometown. A temporary stop at a motorway service station. While I was waiting for hot water for instant noodles, I saw a mother next to me angrily slap her daughter in the face. The girl was about eight or nine years old, dark and thin, with evasive eyes, and she seemed to have a sense of inferiority. After being beaten by her mother, she looked around timidly. I could only avoid her gaze once. Because she definitely didn\’t want what happened to her to be seen. No child wants to be seen, because everyone has dignity. But young children cannot control their parents\’ behavior. After being beaten, I could only endure it and let my mother trample on my dignity in front of so many people. I think this girl was frightened and helpless inside such a public place and could only bear it silently. But after the angry mother vented her anger, it was as if nothing had happened. He held the hand of a young son and played with Xiaobao again. Many years later, I don’t know how this girl will recall these experiences. Sometimes, it often leads to tragedy. A few days ago, a 10-year-old boy in Chongqing jumped out of his bedroom window and died in anger because \”his father did not allow him to watch TV and refused to accept his education.\” It is a pity that a life like the rising sun suddenly passed away. We are unable to explore the details of the incident. It is a fact that children are \”weary of studying\” and their fathers are strict in their discipline. The tragic occurrence shows that family education problems have been accumulating for a long time. Psychologists have found that when children\’s rebellious behavior reaches the extreme, they will resort to the most serious and tragic self-destruction to resist the intrusion of the controller\’s will. When children enter adolescence, they become more emotionally unstable and act impulsively. I always feel that my parents\’ words are to control and blame myself. What may seem like a gentle reminder to parents will turn out to be very different when it comes to children, and its power will be magnified several times. If parents do not respect their children\’s personality, butCriticizing or beating at will will hurt the child\’s self-esteem and cause emotional confrontation between parents and children. Parents must respect their children and realize that their children are independent beings. I need your respect and sincere and unconditional love. In recent years, many mothers have seen a lot of news about children jumping off buildings, and they find it scary. I asked, \”My son often watches cartoons, but I don\’t allow him to watch them. If he loses his temper, should I control him? Am I being too strict and causing problems?\” Many children have entered adolescence, and their parents are even more indifferent. Dare to take charge, afraid of problems. As a result, many children wander further and further away from home. Of course you have to take care of your children, but there is a prerequisite for taking care of your children: respect and love. Have an attitude: calm and firm, not scolding. In the first few years, sow the seeds of respect and love in your child\’s heart. Even if it is discipline, there will be no problem. Because children are warm at heart and love their parents, they will not choose self-destructive ways to fight against their parents. If you have a bad temper, you will spank your child indiscriminately whenever he makes a mistake. Then tell the child that I hit you for your own good. He talked a lot about it, but the child couldn\’t hear a word. Because your so-called \”kindness\” and concern will turn sour when you are angry. Parents\’ emotional peace is a blessing for their children. Especially in families where parents love each other and are harmonious, children\’s tempers will be much better. Because emotions are contagious. When many people grow up, they find that they have the same bad temper as their parents. The child\’s temper is very similar to his own. In fact, it all has to do with the environment in which we get along and the way we are raised. Violent families breed violent children, while peaceful parents breed children with good character. Parental love should be sincere and unconditional. Many mothers say, of course I love my children, and I am even willing to give my life for them. But when problems arise, they immediately become \”conditional\”. \”You\’re so naughty, don\’t call me mom.\” \”I don\’t like you if you\’re still like this.\” \”Look at that so-and-so in your class. I\’d be happy if you were half as good as him.\” \”Give it to me.\”省心一点。小心我揍扁你。”看上去好有道理,满满的“爱”,但是都绑着条件。 For children before the age of 3, all we can do is meet their psychological needs for love. I remember a long time ago. Once, my son was lying on the bed and wouldn\’t get up by himself. Grandma must give me a hand. Grandma said you are so old, you can get up by yourself. He struggled and started crying. Later I went over and pulled him up reluctantly. I know that my grandma, who is used to doting on him, sometimes plays a little bit of a little temper, saying that she wants to temper her child. That night, he was dreaming and still crying, \”Pull me, pull…\” It was a small thing, but the impact on the child could be seen. Sometimes, when a child is noisy, it\’s just that you don\’t pay attention to him. And sometimes it’s because I need a loving hug from you. Sometimes, you may be wrong, but you must ask your children to do what you want. I have seen many adults, especially the elderly, who like to entertain children. The child says, \”Grandpa, carry me up.\” The grandpa then says, \”Call me grandpa, scream louder, and I will hug you again.\” Children are often angry and do not scream. In the end, the grandfathers coaxed and tricked the child to make him happy and satisfy him. never tire of itSome of them are made to make the child cry. Children are not pets. Never keep them as pets. In fact, I have raised puppies, and puppies also have their own ideas. Gotta respect them. This is even more true when raising children. In the initial stage, parents\’ emotional peace and companionship, as well as timely satisfaction of their children\’s reasonable needs, are the best sources of security. Love requires vocal practice. You can usually express your love to your children. Sometimes when sleeping with my son. I would say, \”Who is my favorite baby? My pillow or my quilt?\” At this time, my son would hug me tightly and rest his head on my arm. A little happiness on their face said: \”It\’s me! It\’s me!\” They will take every love from us seriously. A child has a warm heart, which is more important than anything else. When there is this kind of intimate love between parents and children. Let’s talk about rules and life education.

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