• Tue. Dec 5th, 2023

What happens to those children who have never been beaten or scolded by their parents when they grow up?

Around me, there are very few children who have never been beaten or scolded by their parents. Including myself, most people have been scolded, beaten, or even beaten often by their parents during childhood or even adolescence. Among these people, the understanding of being beaten and scolded can be roughly divided into two situations: it is normal to be beaten and scolded by parents if you are disobedient as a child. If your own children are disobedient, they will be beaten and scolded; Feeling deeply humiliated, she vowed never to beat or scold her children. In fact, the attitudes of parents in the world towards their children can be divided into three categories: never spank or scold their children, occasionally spank or scold their children, and often spank or scold their children. Frequent beating and scolding of children is undoubtedly a pathological behavior. What is certain is that this type of parents have not been treated well by their parents since childhood, and they have not learned relevant parenting knowledge. After having children of their own, automation copied their parents\’ parenting patterns. It should be the behavior of most parents to occasionally beat and scold their children. After all, as a parent, you are a human being first, and humans have moods and emotions. When your children challenge your bottom line when you are in a bad mood, it is reasonable to yell or hit you impulsively. Only a small number of parents are able to never beat or scold their children – even fewer in rural areas and ordinary working-class families, because work takes up most of their time and they do not have more energy and patience to deal with their children\’s \”mistakes\” , often using simple and crude methods, which can often achieve immediate results. Of course, there is also an extreme way of never hitting or scolding – just ignore it. Today we will only discuss those children who are deeply loved by their parents and have never been beaten or scolded. What will happen to them when they grow up? A. My friend is a freelancer and a middle-aged girl. I often hear parents say that if their children are disobedient, they can just give them a spanking. I find this very strange. Because rude people educate their children in this way, and then their children educate the next generation just like them. In this cycle, there is no happy generation, only grumpy generations. I\’ve never been beaten or scolded, but that doesn\’t mean I\’m a good kid. On the contrary, I was playful in elementary school and my grades were average; I fell in love in middle school, and my grades fluctuated; in high school, I suddenly realized that I had the best parents in the world. I vowed to be worthy of them and myself. After working hard, I was admitted to a good university. So how did I discover that my parents were great? In high school, I lived on campus. There are six people in a dormitory, listening to classmates talk about their parents. Some said that they were naughty since childhood and were often beaten by their parents; some said that their mothers had a bad temper and would be scolded if they disobeyed; some said that in junior high school, a boy wrote a love letter to her, but her mother discovered it. He scolded her and even found the boy\’s parents, embarrassing himself. I suddenly remembered that when I was naughty, my parents’ encouragement and guidance; when I fell in love early, my parents’ forbearance and concern; when my grades declined, my parents’ patient comfort and companionship. They gave me plenty of room to grow and reflect. Therefore, now, I never suppress my children, let alone beat or scold them. Instead, like my parents, I believe that making mistakes is the only way for children to grow up. As long as the parents are rightJust guidance is enough, there is no need to use too strong medicine. B. My colleague’s husband is a university teacher, married with no children. (Smug face) Who hasn’t been beaten as a child? With such a thick wooden stick, it will break as soon as it goes down. However, this is the experience of being beaten by the gangster in our village, not mine. I remember when we were young, we boys often stole other people’s watermelons, caught other people’s chickens and ducks, climbed mountains and climbed trees and fished in rivers, so we didn’t feel too comfortable. It\’s not like today\’s children, who are either in training classes or on the way to training classes, miserable and miserable. Also, what I find strange is that we all come from childhood, and we know very well that we were not perfect at that time, and had many shortcomings that adults cannot tolerate (of course, adults also have many shortcomings that children cannot tolerate, I just don’t dare to say it.) And most of us, after becoming parents, often have a beautiful image of ourselves in our hearts, as if we have never made any mistakes. My father is an uneducated but intelligent man. He feels that boys should not be too meticulously cared for, nor should they be treated roughly. When I was in junior high school, I stole money from my family, put it in a bottle, and hid it in a shoebox under the bed. One day, when I came home from school, I found that the bottle was missing. Just when I was jumping up and down anxiously and scratching my head, my father came back. Without saying a word, he took out the bottle from behind and handed it to me. He gave me another twenty yuan and said, \”You are older now. You may need money to buy books, materials and make friends. Tell me next time, it is not necessary.\” Save it yourself.\” At that moment, I felt really mixed emotions in my heart. I was both ashamed of my behavior and moved by my father\’s trust and understanding. It seemed at that moment that I understood that I was a trustworthy person. C. Former colleague and mother of two children. I am an only child born in the 1980s. My parents are both very gentle people, and in my impression, they never seemed to have any quarrels. At that time, we lived in a family compound and heard other people\’s quarrels from time to time. Once I asked my mother: \”Why do other people\’s families always quarrel? Why don\’t our families quarrel?\” My mother said: \”Because my father and I believe that quarreling cannot solve problems.\” They believe that quarreling cannot solve problems, and naturally they also believe that fighting Scolding cannot educate children well. Therefore, when I was growing up, my parents’ attitude has always been “gentle but firm” – when it comes to “gentle but firm”, I have to say that my parents learned Jane Nelson’s core parenting philosophy without any teachers. Did it. Now, I am a mother of two children. One is seven years old and the other is four years old. They are also very naughty and can get into many situations, but I feel more happiness and satisfaction in raising children. Because my husband has a gentle personality and, like my father, he respects my thoughts and feelings. I often wonder, what can be passed down in a family? Maybe it’s not a house or jewelry, but a quality, an attitude. For example, because my parents are happily married, I believe that my marriage must also be happy. My parents believe that quarreling cannot solve problems, and I also believe that effective communication is a must. My parents believe that beating and scolding cannot educate children well. I also believe that only true love can achieve long-term educational effects. If you are like them, thenIf you have never been beaten or scolded by your parents, please leave a message below the article to make us envious.

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