It seems that many children have trouble getting up in the morning. I also often encounter \”Waterloo\” in the morning. If I am not careful, it will become a situation of \”I look fierce and evil, and Baoduo has tears in his eyes.\” This morning period has become the only unhappy part of my parenting life. I also wonder, he is usually quite well-behaved, why is he having trouble getting up? Forget it, don’t they say that everyone gets angry when they wake up? He was just angry when he got up, and there was nothing he could do about it. Please forgive him! It\’s true that I wake up angry. Why do people get angry when they wake up? The following is an excerpt from the answer given by Feng Shenxing, an excellent respondent on Zhihu: In terms of circadian rhythm, getting up is usually a period when the body temperature and blood pressure begin to rise, the heart rate will accelerate significantly, and irregular heartbeats may also occur. At the same time, after waking up, the respiratory rate Speed up, gastrointestinal peristalsis increases in preparation for excretion, and the body is in a state of dehydration and hunger. What do these mean? It means that the peripheral nervous system begins to be in a highly active state, and it also means that it is very close to the physiological signals of emotions such as anger and anxiety. Therefore, the mechanism of getting angry is very simple, that is, the cerebral cortex is deceived, making us mistakenly believe that the signals from the organs, peripheral systems, and limbic systems are emotional signals, indicating that we are threatened and need to be more aggressive. There are also some situations that will aggravate the level of irritability when you wake up, which are divided into three types. 1) Behaviors that disrupt circadian rhythms before going to bed, such as drinking coffee, having a hangover, exercising strenuously for a long time, staying up late, etc. These behaviors will not only aggravate waking up, but may even affect your mood and work efficiency throughout the next day; 2) Sleep A poor environment, such as being too bright, too dark, too cold, too hot, too hard, or too soft, may have an impact. Sudden changes in the sleep environment will also aggravate the situation; 3) Being awakened during rapid eye movement sleep, REMs peripheral Both the system and the motor system are in the active period of sleep. The intensity of the physiological signal in REMs is obviously stronger than that in NREMs. Moreover, it does not go through the upgrading process and is directly in a state of high arousal. It is very normal for anxiety or even emotional disorders to appear. It\’s a long paragraph, right? Next, let’s make some key points, that is to say: first of all, getting angry when you wake up is a physiological phenomenon. Secondly, don’t pay too much attention to getting angry when you wake up. The more you emphasize, the greater the psychological effect. Third, with reasonable adjustments, waking up irritated can be avoided. Everything will go much smoother if you first understand others. Therefore, when waking up early, avoid being rough and gentle. Don\’t lift the quilt violently, or yell loudly, etc. It is more recommended to open the curtains to let the light in, or play some music. However, these tricks are not commonly used in my family. I use \”nagging chat\” to start Baoduo\’s day. I talk a lot and have a natural advantage. I start a question-type chat, such as: \”Do you have a physical fitness class today?… Hey, is your physical fitness teacher still a Coke brother?… Do you eat red bean paste buns for breakfast today?…\” Bao Most of them are talkative. As I was talking, he couldn\’t help but talk to me without even opening his eyes. Well, I woke him up successfully. Quite a waste of time, right? Yes. However, simply and rudely pulling the child up from the bed will cause him to cry irritably. No matter whether you coax him or yell at him, it is a waste of time. AnywayIt takes time, so why not live happily? In addition to getting angry, procrastination is also a problem for many children. Brush your teeth, daze for a while, wash your face, wash it again and again, after washing, stand in front of the towel and play with it, put on clothes, button a button in two minutes… The parents are nearby, and one of them can\’t help but rush up and do it for him. I have never advocated dressing children and carrying their schoolbags. I don’t want “doing your own thing” to become an empty slogan. Many parents feel that it is a burden on their children, but in fact, it is their right. When adults do things for their children at every turn, they are depriving them of their rights. I was on the road and heard one mother complain to another, saying: \”I was in a hurry in the morning, so I dressed him for him, and let him dress himself. It took so long to wait, and I was getting angry. Anyway, I was waiting for him to grow up.\” When you grow up, you will be able to wear it yourself…\” I have to say that this view is very common. \”It will come naturally when you grow up.\” This is a reason why many people have arranged children. This reason seems quite sufficient, but it is not. Is getting dressed as simple as just getting dressed? Behind this is habit formation. If a child is dependent, even if he can do it, he may not be willing to do it. If you really try to correct it at that time, you will not only have to pay more costs, but there may also be a price. For example, the child will think that the parents do everything for him as a matter of course. Once the parents refuse to continue to do everything, the child will inevitably complain and be ungrateful. If you don\’t dress and wash him, then let the child delay? No, you always have to think of some tricks. I teach my children to tell the time. When the long hand points, they must get up. I will also time him and teach him to estimate time. After a year-long \”tug of war\”, he was finally able to go to school happily every day. Every parent-child relationship is unique, and parents need to grasp the scale and balance. When accompanying children, the most important thing is the process, not the result. In the process of children\’s growth, many problems will appear in stages, such as sensitive periods, such as rebellion, such as procrastination. Parents should control the rhythm and teach them to make choices when negotiating with their children, rather than directly avoiding them for the sake of results. question.
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