• Tue. Dec 5th, 2023

Why must fathers participate in their children’s education? The answers are all here

In this article, Rui Ma summarizes the five important responsibilities that fathers bear in educating their children, and also proposes seven tips for becoming a good father. Mothers can forward this article to their children’s fathers and let them be your good parenting partners. Don’t let yourself fight alone. Nowadays, many people use the terms \”widowed marriage\” and \”widowed parenting\” to describe the status of Chinese families. It may sound alarmist, but it points out the crux of the Chinese family problem to the core. Because, in many families, the role of \”father\” is habitually missing. This lack mainly includes two aspects. The first is physical deficiencies. Due to objective and external reasons such as work, business trips, entertainment, etc., many fathers often leave early and come home late, staying away from their families and not having enough time to accompany their children. On the other hand, there is a lack of emotion. Even if fathers are at home, most of them are playing mobile phones, playing games, and sleeping. They rarely interact emotionally with their children and ignore their children\’s existence. However, some surveys show that the more involved the father is in family education, the higher the child\’s IQ, the better the results in school, the easier it will be to succeed in society, and the happier the family life will be. Teacher Tian Xian, the founder of the \”Chinese-style Elite Education\” system, also mentioned in \”7 Lessons on Building High-Quality Native Families\” held by the \”Parents\’ Must-read Lecture Hall\”: \”Because of the differences in gender and ways of thinking, the father\’s education and Mothers are very different. Without the participation of the father, the child\’s education is very incomplete. \”Fathers can help improve their children\’s IQ. Toshiyuki Sawaguchi, a Japanese child brain education expert, believes that if children, especially primary school students aged seven to 12, can be accompanied by their fathers to play more, it will be very helpful for their children\’s brain development. Mom They spend more time with their children by telling stories, playing indoor games, singing, etc., while fathers prefer to play sports such as playing ball and running. Therefore, fathers are better able to help their children develop good habits of loving sports. Children\’s brain development , the most important thing is external stimulation. The more activities a child has, the more external stimulation he will have, and his intelligence will naturally be higher. Another point is that when faced with children\’s problems, the father\’s patience may be more important than that of the mother. There will be less. Fathers often become impatient after just a few words, and then throw the problem to the child. This may seem rough, but it cultivates the child\’s habit of independent thinking in another way, which helps to develop the child\’s thinking ability. Intelligence. I have to admit that fathers help cultivate their children\’s calm and generous character. Because of women\’s unique sensitivity and abundant emotions, most mothers have a more emotional way of thinking. When educating children encounter blows and setbacks, especially fathers When the lack of her mother puts her in an isolated and helpless state, their emotions are often easily agitated, fluctuating and swinging. Dad, on the other hand, is more rational and often shows a kind of crisis-like attitude when faced with various difficult situations. He is calm and emotionally stable. If a father spends a long time with his children, he will subtly help his children develop a calm character who does not panic or feel sorry for themselves when things happen. Fathers help their children develop independent personalities. Because of the experience of being pregnant in ten months andThe psychological weaning between mothers and their children is difficult. Mothers are full of protective desire for their children. They like to take care of everything for them in every detail, and they are happy to do so. They are not willing to let them do anything risky, and they want to be free from 360 degrees. Protect them with utmost care. Compared with mothers, fathers often adopt a free-range model, which plays an irreplaceable role in helping children establish independent and assertive personalities. Mothers like to decide everything and arrange everything for their children, while fathers have a peaceful and open mind. They encourage their children to think, do things, and make decisions on their own. Therefore, children raised by their fathers tend to be more independent and rely on their own strength to overcome difficulties when faced with them, rather than asking for help from their parents. Fathers help reinforce their children\’s gender identity. For boys, fathers serve as role models for masculinity. When boys communicate with their fathers, they can observe and imitate men\’s language and behaviors from their fathers, thus cultivating their masculinity. If the father is less involved and the child cannot find someone to imitate, the concept of a man will be skewed. At the same time, under the influence of the mother\’s gentle personality, boys are prone to develop sentimentality, cowardice, timidity and other characteristics. The father is often the first man his daughter comes into contact with in her life. The father plays a greater role than the mother in how to communicate with men. She will learn about the mode of getting along with the opposite sex and the psychological state of facing the opposite sex through the father-daughter relationship. Girls who have high-quality fatherly love are more cheerful and confident. They do not feel shy and unnatural among men. They are frank and sincere and have more inner strength. It is under the foil and contrast of parents that children will better understand the meaning of male and female, so that children\’s gender roles can be formed healthily and smoothly. Fathers Shape Their Children\’s Future Intimate Relationships During the fetal period and early childhood, boys are primarily influenced by their mothers. If the father is absent, it is difficult for a boy to break through this influence, and the mother\’s influence will fill his body and mind. In the future, he is likely to become a mama\’s boy who puts his mother at the center of everything and listens to her in everything. But he cannot be a man who cherishes his wife and maintains a long-lasting relationship, and he cannot be a good father. Moreover, boys often carefully observe their father\’s behavior and values. If his father is often angry at home and disrespects his wife, the child will also adopt the same disrespectful attitude towards his mother and other women. For girls, a husband who is full of responsibility for the family, respects and cares for his wife, and often spends time with his children will unconsciously set the standard of a husband for his daughter. Girls who lack their fathers are more likely to be attracted by superficial relationships between men and women, eager to find the warmth of their \”father\”, but the results are often very bad. It can be seen that in the process of educating children, the role and role of fathers are irreplaceable. So, what can dads do to be a good dad? 1. The first thing fathers need to do is to change their mentality and regard themselves as partners in educating their children, rather than as hands-off shopkeepers or mothers\’ assistants, and learn to take the initiative to take on some child care tasks. 2. Go home and finish eating at least four times a week. Communicate more with your children at the dining table. Don’t eat while eating.Criticize your children during meals, say more pleasant things, and cultivate parent-child intimacy. 3. Exercise with your children. You can run, play ball, swim, climb, etc. with your children to cultivate their good habits of loving sports, exercise their adventurous spirit, and pass on optimistic and positive energy to them. 4. If you are very busy at work and have less time to spend with your children, then pay more attention to the quality of companionship. When you are with your children, try not to talk about work, don\’t play mobile phones, or play games, and stay with them wholeheartedly. 5. If you often travel on business, make more phone calls and video chat with your children. Let your child know that even though you are no longer with him, your heart is still with him. 6. Read with your children. Harvard University research shows that children benefit more from studying with their fathers. During the reading process, men are more likely to trigger divergent thinking and more imaginative discussions, which is helpful for children\’s language development. 7. Love mom. Parents\’ love for each other is the best love for their children. The love between parents is the most stable sense of security and the greatest happiness for children. In the heart of a child, no one can replace the role of a father. Children\’s growth is irreversible. Fathers must not be lazy for a moment, which will cause lifelong regrets.

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