Some people say that a happy childhood can heal a lifetime; but an unfortunate childhood takes a lifetime to heal. Previously, there was a topic on the Internet #Irritable parents were lifted out of their children #Swipe the screen ↓↓↓Scientific parenting book recommendation I really hope my parents have read this book electronic version download Think about it, if parents are emotionally fragile , small things start to turmoil, so what will happen when the children grow up? How sensitive and vulnerable should a child growing up in such a native family be? This topic deeply touched the hearts of parents and children and aroused strong resonance among netizens ↓↓↓The most typical manifestation of emotionally fragile parents is that they cannot control their mouths: in \”Desire Villa\” said: \”A soft tongue may Breaking a person\’s muscles and bones, words sometimes do more harm than violence.\” A single word can break a child\’s heart. A word can also make a child resist all the pain in the world. Perhaps, your emotions have not caused physical harm to your child; however, your momentary shock of fragile emotions has become a form of mental torture for your child. Children who grow up in such a family begin to walk on ice, fearing to make mistakes, please their parents, and learn to be careful to avoid their parents\’ emotional explosions. Parents may not realize what harm a bad temper can do to their children? Your irritability can determine your child\’s lifelong personality. Foreign psychologist Juliette Virzi interviewed many children who grew up in this kind of family and summarized 15 common personalities↓↓↓Let’s see which child is yours↓↓↓ 1. Continuously Apologize Because their parents have bad tempers, some children will keep apologizing for their parents\’ tantrums. Children who grow up in such a home will always be alert and cautious. A child named Jody B said in an interview: \”I like to do things alone now because if I catch someone looking at their watch while doing something with others, I will immediately start to panic and feel like I am wasting other people\’s time and Keep apologizing.\” \”Looking at the watch to check the time is obviously a common thing, but for me, it is so scary that I immediately turn on the apology switch.\” Another one is named Natalie J. The child also said: \”I will apologize for all normal things. If I have different opinions, I will apologize; if I can\’t help crying, I will apologize.\” \”I try my best to please everyone to keep the peace, and I am not willing to stand up Attention-grabbing, because if I did that at home, I would be blown away by my parents’ anger.” 2. Overthinking It’s easy for parents to lose control of their emotions, which can cause their children to overthink. Because when a parent explodes, the child thinks, I made another mistake, what did I do wrong to upset the mother? Such thoughts can cause children to become anxious and suffer from their parents\’ negative emotions. One child said in an interview: \”I think about everything in detail, to the point of anxiety. Because I am trying to prepare for the next thing that will disappoint you.\” 3. Particularly afraid of disappointment. This isIs a typical \”pleasant personality\”. These children are always trying to please others, caring about others\’ feelings, considering their needs, and worrying about disappointing them. Therefore, children with this personality live so tiredly and without self! A child named Rye B. said: “Because I’m afraid of getting into trouble or making people angry, I try not to say anything or do anything.” “Even when I’m with my closest friends, I feel like I have to You can only speak and act after getting permission from the other person.\” 4. Families that desire to control irritability will also raise controlling children. Some kids feel like, “I can’t control myself because I feel responsible for everyone’s feelings.” Such children always try to keep everything within their control so as not to make their parents dissatisfied with their negligence. Murphy M. said, \”My father had a bad temper and my mother was always the victim. So I tried to manage every little thing so that he wouldn\’t explode and my mother wouldn\’t suffer. Now, once things happen Out of control, I feel so anxious because I think it\’s bound to get worse. Because if I can\’t control everything, something might upset someone. It\’s all my fault, not just me Trouble. This is too tiring, no one will love me.\” 5. Your child is a \”good old man\” taking care of everyone, so I asked you if you are tired? Children who grow up in angry families experience the ups and downs of caring for their parents\’ emotions. Therefore, when they deal with people outside, they also know how to take care of other people\’s emotions and feelings, and even naturally become confidant brothers and sisters. Chloe L. said: \”I naturally take care of everyone because I have always had to do that my whole life. But when I try to take care of myself, I fall apart.\” 6. It\’s hard to choose. In the TV series \”Little Happiness\”, Tao Hong plays Song Qian, who is not only a mother who desires control, but also a fragile and sensitive mother. She would cry and argue with her daughter over watching movies. You can also destroy the secret base that Qiao Weidong established for his daughter; it is also possible that in order to keep his daughter by his side, he interrupted his application for the NTU exam, causing Qiao Yingzi to suffer from long-term insomnia and fall into the river↓↓↓She always designed the future for Qiao Yingzi and for her daughter Choose life so that the daughter will be wary of the mother when she is trapped in endless painful choices. Therefore, Qiao Yingzi suffered from insomnia for more than a month, and Nanda became the last straw for her! \”It was very difficult for me to make choices, or express any opinions. Because throughout my childhood, my teenage years, and even my 20s, I wasn\’t allowed to decide anything on my own,\” one child said in an interview. 7. Ignore your feelings Because of their irritable parents, children try to hide away to avoid direct conflict with their parents. They ignore their own feelings because there is so much pain in life and children have to do this in order to feel less pain. Jody A says: “I will hide all my emotions instead of releasing them. Another child also said: \”I have to ignore my feelings, and it is difficult for me to reach out to others.\” 8. Always please others One child said: “My father was physically and emotionally abusive to me, and now, instead of talking about my feelings, I am always trying to please others, even if it means hurting myself.” Another child also said: \”I always flatter others, I always carefully think about every word I say, and I always try to please others.\” Because if I didn\’t, I might face severe depression or sudden fits of rage. 9. Think of yourself as a supporting role in life. Some netizens said: \”No matter how much I pay, I am the one who is abandoned.\” \”Such children eventually make themselves a supporting role in life. Because they cannot control the results themselves. Faced with the bad emotions of their parents, it is difficult for us to live according to our own wishes. 10. Insecure children\’s sense of security is given by their parents . But if the parents are not in a good mood, they will always think, \”Why did I raise such a thing like you?\” and \”Just pretend I never gave birth to you.\” How can the child be happy and feel safe? Once upon a time, Teacher Yin Jianli once As a guest performer. The host asked her: What did your parents say that made you think it hurt you the most? She answered: My mother hurriedly said to me, I don’t have to raise your daughter, and when I grow up, I Don’t want you to raise it. I’ll live on my own. Later, another host suggested conducting a survey on the spot to find out how many people had heard their parents say something like this. Unexpectedly, 98% of listeners said they Have similar experiences. 11. The character of children who feel that other people\’s actions are always meaningful is similar to \”thinking too much\”: A child said: \”Others\’ unintentional remarks, or a small body movement , will arouse my alertness, make me think what he is hinting at, and make me think about it. “I often feel like these little clues are there to prepare me for life to fall apart, and I’ve become so used to it that I can’t change it. 12. Reject people thousands of miles away. Parents are the originals and children are copies. Parents are emotionally irritable and always drive their children away and isolate themselves. Under the influence of their parents, children always refuse to interact with their parents or even others. People communicate and get along. In response, one child said: “When I’m depressed, I push everyone away because that’s what my mom does. I\’m trying to learn how to let people into my life, but it\’s really hard to do because I don\’t know how to communicate with people properly. 13. Parents with unstable glass hearts are typical glass hearts. When they encounter trivial things, they will be shocked, and they are not stable at all. Some children will become sensitive and unstable under the influence of such emotions. Fragile and unable to control his emotions well. 14. Helping others clean up messes is shown in the TV series \”Flow\”In \”The Good Times\”, Zheng Shuang\’s daughter Yi Yao is a person who often helps her mother clean up the mess. Due to the failure of her marriage, my mother drank all day long and had a bad temper. She was drunk all day long, often quarreled with her neighbors, often dropped things, constantly accused Yi Yao and angered her. As for Yi Yao, he can only clean up the mess for her every time: apologize to the neighbors, take back the beer truck left by his mother, and clean up the messy home caused by vomiting… 15. Considerate Damai didn\’t expect the psychologist to come to this conclusion. Among them, one child said: \”Actually, growing up in such a family is not entirely a bad thing. I realized that when I was very young, I learned how to put myself in other people\’s shoes.\” \”When I was only 3 years old When my mother cried, I went and bought her a stuffed teddy bear for her room.\” Under the influence of emotionally fragile parents, most of the above 15 personality manifestations are bad manifestations. Do you want your children to do this? These characteristics are worthy of reflection by every parent. Probably all parents don’t want to hurt their children because of their own emotions! Therefore, in the process of getting along with their children, parents need to control their emotions, avoid being angry with their children, and talk to them. Bober once confessed on the \”Hello Dad\” program that he beat his daughter Dumpling in anger. He took Dumpling to the zoo to play again, but when the zoo was about to close, Dumpling didn\’t want to leave. Seeing that this kind of persuasion was in vain, some people wanted to take dumplings with them, but dumplings slapped each other unhappily. Seeing this news, Bober immediately became angry and slapped his daughter with his backhand. Dumpling started crying, but Bao Beier did not calm down his emotions, and no one asked to comfort Dumpling. Using the methods of \”fighting violence with violence\” and \”fighting bad emotions against bad emotions\” will only frighten the children into crying, and may not have a very good educational effect. It is indeed wrong for children to hit others, but it is wrong for adults to hit children because they fail to control their emotions and temper. It\’s a scary movie for kids when their parents can\’t control their emotions. In a sense: parents\’ peace is the greatest education for their children. A child\’s temperament comes from the subtle influence of parents as well as the guidance of discipline and behavior. The way parents deal with others, their expression of emotions, and their attitude towards life… will all affect the development of all children\’s behavioral habits, including emotional management. \”Parents\’ emotions affect children\’s lives\” said: \”Parents\’ good emotions can make children feel happy and confident, and are a booster for children\’s progress; parents\’ bad emotions can make children feel depressed and inferior, which is a reason for children\’s frustration and inferiority. The trigger of academic stagnation. \”Parents are like a mirror, emotions will be directly engraved on their children and become the way their children grow up. Grumpy parents are like ticking time bombs to their children who don’t know when they will explode. It is also like a virus, slowly corroding children\’s minds. Children\’s minds are easily damaged and unrecognizable. In the end, no matter what we face, it makes people \”outraged\”\” situation, please parents remember one sentence: Your good mood is the best feng shui in your home! I hope that all parents will not be swayed by emotions and will not be defeated by their own emotions. How to stimulate students\’ learning The full video download of Interest and Motivation can effectively control emotions when getting along with children, give children the love of blue sky and white clouds, and help children grow up healthily and happily.