I took the subway home a few days ago. There was a grandmother sitting next to her, holding a boy about two years old in her arms. The child must have felt stuffy in the car and kept fussing there. He looked longingly at his mother standing in front of him. I think he was calling for his mother\’s attention. After a while, his mother, who was looking at the phone, still didn\’t see him, so he cried loudly. \”What\’s wrong, baby?\” Grandma asked with concern. \”Look! I want to see it,\” the child shouted. \”Okay, don\’t cry, here it is!\” Grandma said, asking her mother to bring her mobile phone. Then I turned on my phone and played a short video for my child to watch. At this time, the child became happy. He grabbed the phone skillfully with his two little hands and stared at the video on it. I saw a group of adults twisting and making a lot of noise up there. But the child can still row by himself. Stop after stop. During this period, my mother wanted to take the phone over. But the child immediately burst into tears and held on tightly. \”Mom wants to call dad. Can I give my mobile phone to mom?\” \”No, no…\” Seeing the child making trouble again, grandma quickly took out her mobile phone and gave it to her mother. When I got off the car, the child must have been watching for nearly 20 minutes. Many mothers asked me: \”What should I do if my children are always addicted to mobile phones?\” Another mother said that her two-year-old child would grab mobile phones to play with. If he doesn\’t give it, he will cry. There is nothing the family can do to him. When I saw this little boy watching videos on the subway. I almost understand the dilemma that mothers face. But who caused this ending? Are children addicted to mobile phones happy? I don\’t think so. Almost all children who are addicted to mobile phones have a tense relationship with their parents. Because parents who still want to take care of their children. I still wonder if my child has been playing for too long? Is it okay to play like this? So I will think of ways to restrain the child. But children will also find ways to compete with their parents. This will increase the amount of time parents spend yelling. Children will also lie more frequently. This is not conducive to the establishment of a close parent-child relationship. It can also cause children to feel empty and bored. I used to think it was just adults who would say it was boring! But I have more contact with children. In fact, they also like to say \”It\’s boring!\” When they say this, they have already prepared the next sentence, but they just haven\’t made it clear to their parents. The subtext is \”Can I watch TV?\”, \”Can I play with my mobile phone?\”, \”Can I go out to play?\” In short, I want to change from the current state. For such children, being quiet is a very scary thing. It is impossible to read a story quietly, look at the scenery outside quietly, or learn something with concentration. Once the child spends all his free time on his mobile phone. That would only make him more bored. Because the interest is too single, there is no choice. Boredom made him more and more addicted to his mobile phone. The more addicted you are to your mobile phone, the more boring you feel. This is a vicious cycle. Some mothers will say, in order to prevent children from being addicted to electronic products, should they be prohibited from accessing electronic products? In fact, this is also an extreme. Because in the current environment, it is impossible for children to be isolated from mobile phones and computers. Whatever the reason, we are always exposed to electronics. And their era will definitely be closely related to artificial intelligence machine networks.But I still hope that the age of contact is later. Keep the duration of a single contact shorter. In this matter, blocking is worse than blocking. I would like to give you three suggestions: First, sow a concept in children\’s minds as early as possible: electronic products are tools that can be used for study and office work, as well as communication. This is not a gaming console. This concept cannot be explained clearly in one sentence, nor can it be understood and accepted by children at once. It requires a long process, patience, and the guidance of parents. When Xiao Xiaoyu was more than two years old, he often grabbed his grandma\’s mobile phone and pressed it. There was a time when I noticed that he often snatched mobile phones. I guess he thought of it as a toy. Moreover, grandma also played board and card games on her mobile phone, which further deepened the child’s impression of it as a fun thing. At that time, I told the old man the above concept. At the same time, talk to Xiao Xiaoyu when he is in a good mood. When he grabbed the phone again. I find some more fun toys for him. Or take him to play games. With my big toy. He forgot about the mobile phone toy. Coupled with the cooperation of the old man, the mobile phone has always remained a very ordinary toy in his heart. Until he was three or four years old, he could already understand my words. I also understand what the mobile phone does. But he would also see his brothers playing mobile games. I also told him that he can play, but he must control the time. I also downloaded mini games for him, including crocodile bathing and digging for dinosaur fossils. One at a time, you can play for months. And only those few have been playing until now. He spends his time figuring out the camera and recording functions. Learning these tools is also a good thing. The key is not to become addicted yet. So, our phones are everywhere and he hardly touches them. The second step is to set rules, stick to them and form a habit. The premise is that parents should set an example. In the first half of the year, in order to make it easier for Xiao Xiaoyu to learn English, I prepared a tablet computer for him. I still remember the three agreements we made when we bought it back: 1. This computer is for learning, not for gaming. 2. Each use time cannot exceed half an hour, except when required for classes. 3. If you violate the above two items, it will be confiscated. The little guy happily agreed. The days that followed were the time to test me. I sometimes use my son’s pad to watch movies and listen to music when he is at school. I also browsed around in the app store, trying to find some more relaxing games to play. You know, this big screen is more fun than my mobile phone. But think about it calmly, how could you do this? If you can\’t follow the rules you set for your children, it\’s simply a joke. So after browsing, I gave up in a hurry. So when it comes to setting rules, parents should set an example. If you spend all your time at home on your phone. Then don\’t expect your children to do well. Nowadays, when I am not studying, my computer is kept in the cabinet. Just like a paper notebook, lying quietly. Even when I\’m not at home, it still lies there and won\’t be secretly played with by the little guy. Some friends will say that it’s because your child is not old. If he is older, you can’t control him! Then I really have this confidence. Because I have cultivated good behavior in my children since childhood.for habits and cognition. Even when I grow up I will follow it. Voynich wrote in \”The Gadfly\”: \”What\’s the use of an oath? Oaths can\’t bind people. If you have a certain understanding of a thing, it will bind you. If you don\’t have a certain understanding, nothing will It will restrain you.\” If you let your child realize that indulging in games is beneficial, he will keep doing it. If he realizes the harm early on, it will form a constraint. I still remember that when I was a kid, I went to town with my friends to surf the Internet. The rule I set for myself is to take classes for an hour at a time. One reason is that I don’t have much money to spend on the Internet, and another reason is that I am afraid that I will become addicted to it. Because my friend has already had the experience of staying up all night. They told me staying up all night online was cheap and fun. But I know that he slept soundly in class during the day. And the homework has fallen behind more than a little. I don\’t want to be this person. I will also mention these feelings to the little fish. Let him understand that computers and mobile phones are tools. We must learn to control the tools instead of being controlled by the tools. Because there are many, many more important things than that. It\’s more fun than that. The last thing is to help children develop more interests and hobbies and enrich their life experience. Nurturers have such a responsibility to let their children have these real experiences in the world. For example, playing ball games or reading, or learning an instrument. Accompany yourself when you are bored. Rather than the virtual network. I have always told my friends about the importance of nature education. You can take the children for a walk outside and look at the soil under your feet, the grass on the roadside, and all kinds of reptiles. Sometimes I see a mother squatting on the roadside, following her baby\’s fingers, looking for those small insects. It\’s really beautiful. But the reality is that too many children are not only without the company of their parents. Instead, he was pulled away by the electronic nanny. When parents are busy, children come to you. The best way is to give him a mobile phone. Then the whole world went silent. But what you think is good actually buries deep hidden dangers. When the child tastes the sweetness of it. It\’s easy to fall into this honeypot. And what we can do is definitely not confiscate mobile phones or smash them. Because this approach will not help. The reason why children are addicted to mobile phones is not because of the mobile phones themselves, nor is it the children. It is the environment and way in which a child lives that affects his life pattern. Parents are a part of their children\’s lives. There is a lack of high-quality parental companionship, lack of effective parent-child communication, and parents themselves are addicted to mobile phones. Isn\’t this all because of family? When children become addicted, they are also victims.
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