Chinese parents always hold their children to the standard of a saint and hold themselves to the standard of a bitch.

What is the best education? The best education is the education of doing nothing. —— Rousseau\’s \”Emile\” Recently, there was such a heartwarming scene on Weibo. While waiting for the subway, a child asked why there were footprints on the ground. After patiently explaining the purpose of the footprints, their parents and grandma neatly placed them I lined up and gave a demonstration to the children. Dong Qing once said in an episode of CCTV\’s \”Face to Face\” program: \”What kind of person you want your child to be, you must first be a person.\” The actions of parents of children will undoubtedly give their children I have taken the best education class, no matter how good a prestigious school is, it cannot compare to the words and deeds of my parents. Unfortunately, some people do not understand this truth. Who are you, who are your children? I have read a story: an old father who was widowed in his early years raised his son to adulthood through all kinds of hardships. At the age of 70, he felt lonely and wanted to go to his son\’s home to enjoy his old age. The old father came to his son\’s house. After the son understood his father\’s purpose, he hesitated and didn\’t know how to reply to his old father. \”You stay with us? Yes…of course…but I don\’t know if you can get used to living here. You know our place is not big…my wife is better…and the children…\” The old man The father knew that he had put his child in a difficult position, so he immediately pretended that he had never said anything. The son said again: No, Dad, I didn’t mean that, but… I haven’t decided where to let you sleep yet… Unless you don’t mind sleeping in the yard… The old father said he didn’t mind, and the son called the 12-year-old The child brought a blanket for his grandfather and told him to cover him when he slept at night. The child asked his father, where does grandpa sleep? Dad replied: In the yard, because we don’t want grandpa to affect our comfortable life. The child went into the back room to get a blanket and cut the blanket in half with scissors. At this time, the child\’s father came over and asked the child: \”What are you doing?\” The child: Dad, I want to cover my grandpa with half of the blanket and the rest. Half a piece of paper will be used when you live in my house when you are old… The fairy tale king Zheng Yuanjie said: \”Whoever you are, your children will be who you are.\” If you are not filial to your parents, what awaits you will be your children\’s disobedience to you; you If you don’t abide by the rules, your children will ignore the rules; if you are not civilized and law-abiding, your children will be corrupt and bend the law… Lenin’s wife Krupskaya said: \”Family education for parents is first and foremost self-education. .\” But parents always habitually educate their children instead of self-education, and even contradict themselves – asking their children to be filial to themselves when they grow up, but they ignore their elderly parents; asking their children not to go around Throw out the trash, but I think the trash can is too far away and throw waste paper everywhere; I tell the children watching TV to go to bed quickly, but I stay by the TV to catch up on dramas; I tell the children not to lose their temper, but I treat the children who make mistakes Yelling and yelling… It can be said that Chinese parents hold their children to the standard of \”sage\” and hold themselves to the standard of \”bitch\”. What is ridiculous is that parents who hold themselves to the standard of \”bitch\” hope that their children can become \”saints\”, not knowing that the essence of educating children is to educate yourself. Everything your children experience may be a true reflection of you. Only \”teaching by words\” without \”teaching by example\”To develop good habits is to deceive oneself. I have read a series of comics before: In the comics, the father doodles and the children also doodle; the father says what the children say; the father eats junk food and the children also eat junk. Food; the father plays games and the children play games too. Obviously, every move, word and deed of parents has been imprinted in the minds of children subtly. If a child has such deficiencies, it is the shadow reflected by the parents, which is what the saying goes, \”the upper beam is not straight and the lower beam is crooked.\” A research team from Iowa State University once conducted a survey and believed that it is impossible to develop good habits in children by relying only on \”words\” without leading by example, and proved that \”the upper beam is not straight and the lower beam is crooked\” is absolutely true. Researchers interviewed 330 white teenagers in the American Midwest and their parents about their eating, exercise, smoking, drinking and sleeping habits. As a result, teenagers not only imitate their parents\’ healthy lifestyles, but also imitate their parents\’ unhealthy lifestyle habits. I think of a short story I read before: a person who loves drinking drinks two drinks every day before work. One day when it snowed heavily, he drank wine before going to work as usual. He was walking in the snow and staggering around. When he turned around, he accidentally saw his son stepping on the footprints he left on the snow, imitating his father\’s staggering. The child\’s imitation shocked him, \”If I do this every day, the child will definitely be an alcoholic when he grows up.\” From then on, he never drank again. Tolstoy has a famous saying: \”All education, or nine hundred and ninety-nine percent of education, comes down to role models, to the correctness and perfection of parents\’ own lives.\” Parents are models for children to imitate, and children They are the epitome of parents. Children see all kinds of behaviors of parents, and their daily words and deeds can be imitated. Not every parent can encounter a snowy morning, and not every parent can discover in time the wrong perceptions they have brought to their children. Parents who want their children to develop good habits by \”words\” without leading by example are deceiving themselves. Education expert Cheng Mochu told a story about a child. The child\’s name is Liu Dingjie. Once, his mother went shopping with him and happened to meet his neighbor Uncle Liu. Not only did he not take the initiative to say hello to Uncle Liu, but even when Uncle Liu talked to Liu Dingjie, he was indifferent and indifferent. He looked impatient and urged his mother to leave quickly, which was very rude. After returning home, her mother pulled Liu Dingjie to her side and asked him why he didn\’t take the initiative to say hello to Uncle Liu, why he ignored Uncle Liu when he talked to him, and why he couldn\’t remember to be polite to others after telling him so many times. The child\’s words left the mother speechless. \”Mom, you can\’t blame me. Although you always teach me to respect the old and love the young, you have never respected my grandma! I remember it all!\” Confucius said: \”If your body is upright, you will not do what you are told; if your body is not upright, you will not do what you are told. Even if you don’t obey the order.” The child also turned a deaf ear to respecting others because he was dissatisfied with the way his mother treated his grandmother. If you always dislike your child for not being gentle and knowledgeable, you might as well do a self-assessment of \”Are you a good role model for your child?\”: Your child is reading and writingWhen you are working, are you busy watching TV or playing games? Do you litter on the road when you can\’t find a trash can? Have you ever cursed or shown unkind emotions to others in front of your children? Are you a parent who gets angry easily and even beats and scolds your children? If the answer is yes, as a parent, please pay attention to your words and deeds no matter where you are, and let your children see that you are working hard to become a better you every day. There is a saying in \”Book of the Later Han Dynasty\”: Those who teach by words will litigate, and those who teach by example will follow. If parents only make demands on their children but do not set a good example for them, how can the children develop good habits with sincerity? Those who teach by words and deeds are better than words. Rousseau said in his famous work \”Emile\”: \”What is the best education? The best education is the education that does nothing: students cannot see the education happening, but it actually affects them. This is the best education in the world.\” At present, many people focus on visible education – sending their children to prestigious schools, enrolling their children in various astronomical tutoring classes, and buying All kinds of high-end school supplies, but they don’t pay attention to invisible education: just send your children to prestigious schools, the teachers can take care of everything, and then play with your mobile phone while helping your children with their homework; I have been like this all my life, trying my best to enroll my children. Various interest classes, and then I can’t even distinguish the musical notation. They desperately want their children to receive the best education and invest in a better environment, but they ignore that parents are the best teachers. The best education is the words and deeds of parents, and sometimes even words are not needed. In ancient times, a prime minister and his wife had completely different ways of educating their children. The way the prime minister\’s wife treats her children is to teach them carefully to study hard, to be honest and trustworthy, to be polite to others, and to be loyal to the country. But all the prime minister did was to get up early to go to court, go back to study late, treat others politely, and never say a word to his son. One day, my wife couldn\’t help but said, \”Don\’t just focus on your official duties and reading books. You should also discipline your son well!\” The prime minister never took his eyes off the book and said, \”I educate my son all the time! \”Which of the two education methods is more effective? The answer is self-evident when you see CCTV\’s public service announcement. In the advertisement, a young mother washes her own feet and her mother-in-law\’s feet. The little boy saw his mother\’s actions, struggled to carry a basin of water, and walked towards his mother… This mother used her actual actions to tell the child how to Honor your parents and respect the elderly. At this time, your mother\’s words and deeds are worth a thousand words. As a famous children\’s educator said, \”If you want to educate your children well, then please shut your mouth first and show it to your children with practical actions.\” \”Teaching by example\” is not as good as \”teaching by example\”. You want your children to become What kind of person you have to be, first of all, you have to become. Behind high-quality children are high-quality parents. It is difficult for parents who ask themselves to be \”bitch\” to raise saints. If you lead by example, your children will definitely become outstanding.