I regret that I only know now: whether the child will do well is because he has too much relationship with his father.

Dear parents, today I want to talk to you about a neglected but extremely important topic. The role of the father in the development of his children. Many families don\’t realize the importance of their father until problems arise, and regrets that could have been avoided have already been made. 01 The absence of the father leaves a \”blank corner\” in the child\’s heart. Psychologist Bowlby once recorded a boy who had excellent grades since he was a child, but suddenly became rebellious in adolescence and his grades plummeted. The mother was puzzled, until during psychological consultation, the young man said something heartbreaking: \”I never know whether my father loves me or not.\” The young man\’s father was busy with work and was away from home for a long time, so he had almost no chance. I had a heart-to-heart talk with my father, but I didn\’t even receive a compliment from him. The \”attachment theory\” proposed by Bowlby points out that if the father is absent, the child will have a serious lack of psychological security and will easily have doubts about his self-worth. If a child does not establish a healthy attachment relationship with his father, he may become emotionally unstable and even have difficulty forming a correct self-understanding. 02 Father\’s \”high-quality companionship\”, highly successful people who influence their children\’s future often have a great father behind them. The great inventor Thomas Edison once dropped out of school when he was a child because he was considered \”not smart enough\” by school. However, his father did not blame him for this. Instead, he taught patiently and used simple experiments to explain scientific principles to little Edison. It was this kind of inspiring companionship that allowed Edison to develop strong curiosity and exploration ability from an early age, and eventually became an inventor who changed the world. On the contrary, those fathers who are \”invisible in the family\” can hardly play a positive role in the growth of their children. \”High-quality companionship\” does not mean staying by your child\’s side every day, but being fully committed to providing encouragement and guidance when interacting with your child. Research by psychologist Gottman pointed out that the affirmation and approval expressed by fathers to their children in companionship can promote children\’s growth more than material support. 03 Mothers can never replace what fathers teach their children. Many mothers may think: \”I can give my children enough love, so it doesn\’t matter if my father spends less time with me, right?\” But this is not the case. The role of a father is irreplaceable, especially for boys and girls, and the impact is different. Boys need their father\’s role model. What boys learn from their fathers is responsibility and responsibility. Psychologist Fromm once said: \”Without a father teaching a boy what power is, power will become destructive.\” A father can teach him how to do things through small things in daily life, such as taking his children to repair broken toys. Solve problems to develop a sense of responsibility and self-confidence in boys. Girls need their father\’s approval Girls are deeply dependent on their father\’s approval. A father\’s praise will make a girl confident in her appearance and abilities, while a father\’s indifference or criticism may give a girl a severe sense of inferiority. A study in the United States shows that girls who have a good father-daughter relationship are more likely to succeed in school and career, and are more likely to establish healthy intimate relationships as adults. 04How does the role of a father “awaken”? On the road to education, fathers can start from the following aspects: Put down your mobile phone and listen to your children’s voices. It doesn’t take long.It takes time, but it must be effective. For example, during meals, ask your children more about what happened at school today, put down your cell phone, and give your children a real \”listening\” session. Participate in children\’s learning and interest activities. The moment a child learns to ride a bicycle, his father\’s company will be an everlasting scene in his memory. Try to participate in activities that interest your child, such as building blocks together, playing football, or completing a small experiment together. Express Love with Actions Many fathers believe that loving their children means working hard and creating good conditions for them. However, what children need is specific actions, such as a warm hug and heartfelt encouragement. Don’t let your kids be disappointed by waiting. Be a role model for the family. Fathers should lead by example and set an example of integrity, persistence and self-discipline for their children. The father\’s actions and attitudes will subtly affect the child\’s outlook on life. 05 The best gift for a child is a responsible father. The influence of a father on his children is like spring breeze and rain. The ancients said: \”If a son does not teach, it is the father\’s fault.\” In family education, the father\’s role is crucial. If a child can have a father who is willing to listen, accompany and guide him, that will be the greatest luck in his growth. Rabindranath Tagore said, \”A father\’s love is like a mountain, calm and silent, but silently supporting the child\’s sky.\” From today on, don\’t ignore the power of your father. Let us work together to become a firm supporter and companion for children on their growth journey, so that they can thrive under the care of love!