I\’m sorry, kid. Mom only has one pair of hands. If I can lift bricks, I can\’t hold you. If I hold you, I can\’t lift bricks.

Legend has it that there once was a very emotional question called: What is your dream? When Chengzi was young, he always wanted to be a writer, and travel around the world like Sanmao, writing all the time. Later, he found that this dream was unrealistic, so he changed it to a more practical dream – he must raise a baby, and then Love him well. If I consider raising children as my dream, I am really hopeless. But I really like children. Even when I had no intention of getting pregnant, I started visiting mother and baby forums, drooling at the photos of babies posted by others, and fantasizing all day long about how good I would be to my child and how good I would be with him if I had a child. How to play. After we had Maotou, although I was tortured half to death by his various problems, I loved him more than I imagined. In addition to some necessary housework every day, I spent all day with him, reading to him, and doing things. Play games, accompany him to wander around outside all day long, play with water and sand, and hit the slides and swings in all nearby communities and schools. It seems that the years are peaceful, but the reality is far from that. There are more and more discordant notes in life. Almost every night after Maotou goes to bed, it is the time for my husband and I to quarrel. Why is it noisy? In one word, poor! Mr. Juicer has an opinion on almost everything I buy. There are so many toys, why buy them? Why are children’s mattresses so expensive? Can’t I just buy the cheapest one that I can sleep on? This wall sticker is so childish, why did you buy it? If you don’t already have a rice cooker at home, why would you buy one just for your child? When Mao Tou was about to start eating minced meat at 8 months old, I wanted to buy some organic beef to cook for him, and I picked the smallest piece. As soon as Mr. Juicer saw the price tag, he threw the meat back as if it was scalding his hands. He said that our children cannot afford such high-end meat. In my opinion, they are all necessary things, but in his opinion, I am spending money indiscriminately. You can say that he is stingy, but it is not unreasonable for him to be stingy. The whole family relies on his little income. Since the birth of the baby, even if they are very careful, they can\’t save much money every month, and they are always running into a deficit. , If you don\’t save yourself a little, you won\’t be able to cope with any emergencies in the future. It is my dream to raise a child, love him well, and give him the best. Then I can’t just rely on my husband to realize my dream! In order to give my children a better life and give myself more confidence in spending money, I had to start looking for various ways to make money. Later, a friend introduced me to a job similar to reselling, which is to buy a lot of bargains online and offline when products are heavily discounted, and then sell them online when the price recovers. At best, it’s called e-commerce, but at worst, it’s just speculation… Although there are purchase quantity limits for discounted products, it’s not a lot of money, but it’s easy to get started, and the main job is to buy (I’m really good at this). The most important thing is The time is flexible and you don’t have to worry about taking care of the baby. It’s a dream job for a housewife! Only when I started doing it did I realize that it was totally useless! No job is easy anywhere. In order to successfully grab the order, I made an exception for the first time and let Mao Tou look at my phone. Night time has become the main working time. In order to grab a discount product, I often wait for a flash sale after 12 o\’clock to place an order. It\’s early morning after doing it.You can\’t go to bed until one or two o\’clock. If the discount store is in the west, you have to wait until three o\’clock in the middle of the night. The next day, you will be depressed and grumpy. In the past, I mainly took Mao Tou out to play with him, but now I take him out mostly to shop for goods. Even if I take him to play, I have to visit two stores along the way to find a good deal. I can design the craziest Thanksgiving discount season It was a good route. I drove from morning to night and visited all the stores in several cities. Maotou had no choice but to spend this tiring and boring day in the car. The house is no longer clean and tidy. There are all kinds of goods, cardboard boxes, and stuffing everywhere. It looks like a small warehouse. And I am not the mother who can accompany me all the time. I am always placing orders, unpacking, sorting, packing, and mailing. There are more and more things going on, and the words \”Mom will accompany you when she is done with her work\” become more and more frequent. Busyness pays off, I can finally buy Mao Tou his favorite car, a police car, a fire truck, a racing car, big or small, he can buy whatever he wants. I was finally able to give Maotou organic milk, so that he could open his belly and eat salmon, avocados and cherries. I can finally buy Mao Tou some comfortable shoes, well-fitting clothes, and for daily necessities, I can give up on bargains and choose high-quality ones. The most important thing is that I finally stopped quarreling with Mr. Juicer, and my relationship quickly recovered, so it is true that poor and humble couples are always sad. Material things are becoming more and more abundant, but the time spent with the children is less than before. Sometimes even if they are accompanied, they are a little half-hearted. I always want to check the computer to see if there is a new list, which makes Mao Tou find out. I hugged my legs and cried while looking at the computer. I have no choice but to focus more on work and less on my children. Although \”you can\’t make enough money and your children will grow up in an instant\”, once you start making money, you are destined to be unable to stop. I Not only did you make money at work, but you also gained a full sense of existence. This feeling of independence and freedom is difficult to give up once you experience it. Moreover, it would be nice to have material living conditions suddenly improve, but as long as you are familiar with a slightly higher quality of life, once the quality of life suddenly drops, it will be even more uncomfortable than when you were always poor. I don’t know whether this change has changed for the better or for the worse. On the one hand, I am happy that I can give my family a better life, but on the other hand, I feel guilty because I cannot devote myself to spending time with my children. I always miss that time when I simply did nothing and spent all day with my children. Three years passed like this, during which I gave birth to a younger sister. Even during pregnancy and confinement, I continued to grab orders and buy goods to do business. Later, because Mr. Juicer changed his job, our family moved across the country, from the United States to Vancouver, Canada. Canada had heavy taxes and poor e-commerce development, so the original business was no longer possible. Fortunately, my husband\’s salary has increased a lot, and it is enough to maintain the original living standard, so I returned to my original life as a housewife. Maotou only went to kindergarten for 2 hours, and I basically spent the whole day with my two children. I quickly became familiar with all the places in Vancouver that are suitable for children to play. Vancouver is a big city, with various museums and amusement parks everywhere. The surrounding scenery is beautiful. There are many places to play with your children, but almost everything costs money. The more fun the place, the more expensive it is. Once you go outIt’s just that money is flowing like water. Even for parks that don’t charge admission fees, the parking fees are a bit overwhelming. Every weekend when the weather is good, I want to go out and enjoy the beautiful rivers and mountains. If I look at my bank account and my heart trembles, it\’s better to have a climbing frame in the small park in front of my house. There are often various performances in Vancouver, and there are many suitable for children. The world-famous Cirque du Soleil came to perform two years ago. I really wanted to take my children to see it, but even the cheapest seats at the back were still excruciatingly expensive. I added the tickets to the shopping cart and struggled for a long time, but gave up. The children are old and can\’t play silly all day long. I want Maotou to learn taekwondo and my sister to learn dance. They are also particularly interested. There are many such specialty classes in Vancouver, but when I asked about the price, I thought Wow, wow, wow… The saddest thing is that we, as a couple, have started to argue frequently about family expenses again, which is so annoying. It feels like we are back to the time when we were poor two years ago. I\’m short of money and can\’t even enjoy spending time with my children! Living with children in a big city has a richer and more diverse environment, which could have broadened the children\’s horizons, but because of a few stinky money, they can only stay where they are, going back and forth in small communities in the community. Wandering around in the park is no different from when I stay in the mountains of the United States. It really makes me feel that I am incompetent as a parent. Don\’t say anything! I still have to find a job! After thinking about it, I came up with \”Talk About Our Baby\”. Thanks to the great WeChat era, I actually had the opportunity to realize a little bit of my childhood dream. At first, I thought that the daily appreciation was enough to supplement the family income. Unexpectedly, thanks to the love of readers and friends, it has grown bigger and bigger, especially after starting a group purchase, and the family was able to live a well-off life again. Last year, the Disney On Ice performance team came to Vancouver. I immediately decided to buy front row seats for the whole family during the show, and I was able to take the whole family to Hawaii for Christmas. In these moments, I really experienced my full sense of value. Making money is always not easy. 3-4 articles + group purchase copywriting per week is already very lazy compared to many public accounts, but for people like me who are not quick in writing, it is already the limit. At first I stayed up late writing manuscripts and spending the day with my baby, but later I found that my body couldn\’t handle it anymore, and I often felt dizzy and had a bad temper. I feel like I can\’t evolve into a creature like a dolphin that doesn\’t need to sleep. After weighing the balance, I have to send Guoguo, who is less than three years old, to a full-day kindergarten. Maotou also has to stay in a day care institution after school at 3 p.m. It took two hours to get home, and I finally returned to a normal human routine. In this way, I became a full-time working mother again, and spent much less time with my children. Although the children are no longer babies and should join social life, I see them accepting the workday earlier than many children. It’s really a bit distressing to have to leave the house from 9 to 5. Especially when children yell that they don\’t want to go to kindergarten or day care and want to be with their mother, it\’s even harder to suppress their guilt. I really hope that I can have the ability to separate myself, so that one can work hard while the other can focus on spending time with the baby. It\’s a pity that it has been concluded since ancient times that if you want both the fish and the bear\’s paw, you are acting like a hooligan. Mom only has one pair of hands. She can’t hold you if she lifts bricks. She can’t hold you if she hugs you.I can move bricks! Looking back on the past few years, although I have not officially worked a 9-to-5 job, I have been quietly juggling between being a stay-at-home mom and a working mom. I have experienced a lot of both kinds of life, so I understand very well what it means to be a full-time mom and a working mom. Stay-at-home mothers are financially strapped, lack of confidence, and have frequent family conflicts. They also understand the guilt and struggle of working mothers who cannot stay with their children for a long time. Even if I am the kind of freelancer that many people envy, who can be my own boss and have flexible working hours, I still cannot truly balance raising children and working. Either the child will be wronged, or I will not be able to do my best at work. I work hard to find a balance every day, so you must forgive me when you find that the frequency of orange push has become less… because the two children often take turns to get sick, take vacations, hold activities at school, etc. Time and energy are bottlenecks that cannot be broken through. There is no job that does not require all-out efforts, and there is no child that does not expect to be accompanied wholeheartedly. These are two full-time jobs, and no matter what, I cannot do the best of both. . No life is perfect, and there are always choices. You have to have enough money to spend, and you have to spend the whole day with your children. This is a luxurious life that is beyond the reach of most people except for a few rich young ladies. Therefore, the choice of whether to work full-time is like a besieged city for moms. People outside the city want to get in, and people in the city want to get out. In fact, no one in the city is happy. In fact, whether you stay outside the city or in the city, you don\’t have to envy other people\’s situations. The most important thing is to make choices that are true to your heart and don\’t have a sense of sacrifice. I hope we all know how to cherish the things we gain, and I hope we don’t be too obsessed with the things we lose.