These 5 types of families are most likely to raise excellent children

Over the weekend, my cousin called and said that her 8-year-old son Lele could no longer be taken care of by herself. I spent most of the summer vacation, either watching TV or sleeping, or playing on my mobile phone, or not studying. His final grade this time was not good either. It is even harder for him to learn something now. He is only in the second grade. If he doesn\’t study hard, what will he do in the future? The next day, I went to her house. The person who opened the door was Lele, who was very happy to see me coming. Lele is very good-looking, with big clear and bright eyes. Before Youyou was a child, I often came to his house to play with him. When I walked into the room, the first feeling was depressing, the lights were dim, and the curtains were still tightly closed in broad daylight. The explanation my cousin gave me was that she was afraid that Lele would see her friends outside and lose interest in studying. My cousin told me, and then looked at Lele who was standing aside, \”Why are you just standing there? Why don\’t you go and do your homework!\” Lele was startled, lowered his head and walked into his room. After the child entered the house, I took a look at the room. The whole living room was very messy. The sofa was piled with clothes of adults and children. There were various bottles and cans on the coffee table, as well as unwashed dishes and chopsticks. My cousin is a carefree person. I already knew this, but I was still shocked by what I saw. I couldn’t believe that this was my cousin’s living environment. I stayed at my cousin\’s house for a whole day that day, but I never saw my brother-in-law. And what my cousin told me the most was this man who was away from home all day long. Finally, our topic fell on the children, saying that the children were lazy, playful, disobedient, and did not study hard. I was speechless for a moment and didn\’t know how to speak. Parents\’ behavior deeply affects their children. Children are all good children, but it is really difficult for such a family to support a promising child. Whether a child will be successful in the future is inevitably related to the family of origin. Living environment, family atmosphere, and tutoring style are the most critical. In my opinion, these five types of families can easily raise excellent children. My colleague Honghong\’s house is a clean and tidy house, which is in sharp contrast to my cousin\’s house. Every time I go to their house, I find that the room is very clean, the bright floor, and the neat bedroom make people feel relaxed and happy. Honghong\’s daughter is 7 years old this year. She has very good academic performance and is often praised by her teachers. During a chat with her daughter, the little girl told me, \”Because my parents love to be clean, they have been strict with me since I was a child. One time, my mother refused to let me eat breakfast because I didn\’t fold the quilt when I got up. I remembered it later.\” \”I think that the child\’s ability to achieve such good results has something to do with the good living habits of his colleagues. After all, a comfortable family environment will make people feel happy. If the room is messy, it will make people feel depressed.\” I have personally experienced the trouble caused by disorganization in my home. Not long after I had Youyou, my home was so messy that I didn’t bother to tidy it up. There would always be piles of rolled-up clothes on the bed, unwashed dishes, and waste paper everywhere. yes. I thought about writing the manuscript and taking care of the child at the same time, but it turned out that the child was not taken care of properly. When she cried, my train of thought was also disrupted. Books in the library were lost before they were returned in time; they forgot to pay the water and electricity bills, and their water and electricity were almost cut off; it often took them a long time to look for a book;… Children have a strong ability to imitate, and they will imitate their parents unintentionally.If the home is messy, then he will learn from you and be lazy. As a result, the whole home will change from messy to messier, and his living conditions and mood will also be messy, and his academic performance will naturally not be good. Families that can talk well \”Look at how sensible xx is, but look at you, you are not even half as good as others!\” \”I have told you so many times, but you just don\’t listen, just be angry with me!\” \”Don\’t call me mom! I Not your mother!”… In reality, there are countless parents like this. They obviously want to help their children correct their mistakes, but they never care about their children’s thoughts and face. They use others to teach their children in front of them and hurt their children’s self-esteem and sense of security. They are obviously caring in good faith. , when it comes to his mouth, he changes his way of saying it; obviously he wants the children to make progress, but he always uses \”suppressive\” education to stimulate the children. Although no physical injuries can be seen due to verbal violence, the haze left in the child\’s heart is likely to stay with him for life. Many children who have been harshly criticized by their parents since childhood still have a strong sense of inferiority, serious insecurity, sensitivity and suspicion even if they have succeeded when they grow up. Therefore, if you want your children to become better, you must first understand that a good education method must be a spring breeze that makes people feel convinced and willing to accept it from the bottom of their hearts. Some people say that in families where the father is involved in raising children: \”Chinese-style family = anxious mother + invisible father + rebellious children.\” Indeed, in quite a few families, fathers have been \”absent\” for a long time. A mother around me often complains: I have to get up several times a night to breastfeed and change diapers, but he sleeps like a dead pig; he sits on the sofa as soon as he gets off work and plays in a team with his friends. Just tell him a few words about games, and he will confidently say that after a full day of work, why don’t you just play games and take a break? But in fact, do fathers really not love their children and not care about their families? Are you really too busy to have time? No, in most cases, they just don\’t pay attention and don\’t realize the importance of the father\’s role in family education. A study by Yale University in the United States shows that children raised by men have higher IQs. Because men have higher knowledge levels than women in many fields, especially history, geography, and philosophy. More courageous. Dad will appropriately encourage his children\’s adventurous behaviors, and he likes to take his children to run, swim, rock climb, and play ball, which invisibly exercises his children\’s willpower. More independent. Most men adopt the \”lazy as long as they can\” model when raising their children. The father\’s letting go gives the children the joy of \”it turns out that I can try so many things\”, and the children\’s \”opinions\” are affirmed, making them more independent. . Raising children is not a battlefield that mothers fight alone. Promising children are indispensable without their father\’s company. In a family where the couple loves each other, half of the children come from the father and half from the mother. Only a harmonious couple can give the children the best sense of security. The best love a father has for his child is a mother who loves her child well; the best love a mother has for her child is appreciating and respecting her child\’s father! A must-read lecture for parents once said when sharing: \”The greatest desire in a child\’s heart is a sense of belonging to connect with his parents. That is a desire that transcends everything…How do children connect with their parents? Just do the same thing as your parents to make up for the shortcomings of one of them. \”For example, a mother often says that her father is not good and does not agree with her father. In order to connect with her father, the child will take strong measures, that is, do the same thing as his father. When we deny our husbands, what kind of things are we giving to our children? What about the message? \”Your father is lazy and irresponsible. Don\’t be like him in the future!\” \”Your father loves gambling. You can\’t love gambling like him!\” \”Your father doesn\’t care about his family. You must never be like him in the future!\” \”A child who grows up in such an environment will eventually become something you don\’t want to see. He will also be lazy, irresponsible, and neglectful of his family. Vice versa. Love between husband and wife is the best thing for children. A gift! There is a news on the website of a well-established tutor’s family: a college student from a prestigious school stabbed his roommate, and the reason was ridiculous, because the roommate objected to keeping dogs in the dormitory, and the student’s dog that committed the crime was given to him by his parents. , is said to be a very expensive dog. So, no matter how expensive the dog is, it cannot live in the same room with the students. What’s more, the school is a place for learning, not a place for raising dogs. Don’t parents understand this? Of course, it’s just that Selfishness, narrow-mindedness, and self-centeredness are deeply embedded in the family. If parents are like this, how can their children distinguish right from wrong? Tutoring and family tradition are the greatest family assets. Some people say that modern education must liberate nature and cannot restrain children with the same old routine. But do they want to However, a child will eventually enter society. If a child is not disciplined by his parents, what price will he pay when he is corrected by society? Grimmelshausen once said: No education, no knowledge , the soul of a person without practice is like a field. Even if this field is naturally fertile, it will not bear fruit if it is not cultivated and sown. Only when parents do this, will the family have an upright family tradition and will Educate well-educated children.