What should I do if my son likes to touch his penis? Just remember these six words

I was taking Ning Ning to play on the slide in the community downstairs. A familiar mother saw me and greeted me from afar. Her daughter is about the same age as Ning Ning, both about 2 years old. She came over and said mysteriously: \”Do you think that today\’s children are all precocious?\” I asked strangely: \”What aspect of precocity are you referring to?\” She smiled sheepishly, scratched her head and whispered. : \”That aspect…\” Seeing my confused face, she continued: \”My girl actually started to dig her private parts with her fingers. She is only over 2 years old. Does she have sexual consciousness?\” Finally, I added in a low voice: \”Does your Ningning know how to do it?\” I laughed, remembering that some time ago, my mother asked me in the background, what should I do if my 5-year-old son touches his penis? , I felt that my son was a bad learner, and the mother was extremely anxious because of this. It seems that many mothers have this kind of confusion, so I answered her: \”Ning Ning hasn\’t yet, but I heard from kindergarten teachers before that many children do it when they take a nap. I think these are normal and have nothing to do with \’precocious puberty\’ Relationship.” Natural Stages of Sexual Development This is not a reassuring statement, but the entire truth. When a soft little life comes into this world, we will pay more attention to when it raises its head, when it turns over, when it grows teeth, when it babbles, when it sits, crawls, stands, walks… A series of things like gross motor development, language development, physical development, cognitive development, etc. are all the focus of our attention, but we only miss the equally important \”sexual development\”. It\’s not until the child starts some activities related to the sexual organs that he feels threatened and anxious, wondering if his child is growing too fast. Isn\’t human sexual feeling unique to adolescence? If you think about it carefully, when we were very young, we also secretly studied our own sexual organs, but in those days, talking about \”sex\” was so cynical. Who dared to ask our parents many times \”Why is there a hole where we pee?\” \”If he hadn\’t been beaten, I would have respected him as a \”man.\” Today\’s children are a generation who are brave enough to express themselves. When they are curious about the body, they will ask questions and touch them, which makes us feel as if they are \”premature\” and \”premature\”. In fact, it is just a manifestation of sexual development that has not been recognized. Just depressing. A person\’s self-understanding begins with exploring one\’s own body. Boys and girls touch their sexual organs, sometimes smelling them after touching them. This is a way for children to become curious about their bodies and learn about them. Curiosity and understanding will only be a short-term process. It may not be long before the child will also experience \”sexual feelings\” in this way. A mother said that she saw her 5-year-old son touching his penis and getting an erection. Did he learn to \”masturbate\” at such a young age? Human sexual organs are very sensitive. When children explore their bodies, they will inevitably be stimulated. Erections are a normal physiological phenomenon and have nothing to do with age. We always look at these sexual activities of children from an adult perspective, but we never think that they are actually a natural stage in their sexual development. Do not support or prevent it since it is a natural stage.We can rest assured that the children are all good, not precocious, nor bad at learning. However, parents and teachers are often at a loss when children engage in these behaviors. There was a mother who once took her 5-year-old daughter to see a psychiatrist because she liked to touch her private parts before going to bed. She thought her daughter was strange. Such excessive attention is to treat the child as a sick person, making her feel that sex-related behaviors and feelings are unhealthy, and will also have a series of adverse effects on her future sexual development. I remember Xiaopai asked me once when I was taking a bath: \”Mom, I found a strange smell where I pee.\” After saying that, she put her finger under my nose and asked me to smell it. I sniffed, but I didn’t actually smell anything, but I answered her naturally: \”Well, that’s how girls smell here.\” Xiao Pai nodded hesitantly and said, \”Okay.\” Later, Xiao Pai was right. He doesn\’t seem to have such a strong interest in exploring his own body. Therefore, my principle is \”no support, no blocking.\” But some mothers still have instinctive fear and rejection of such things. When they see their children doing such behavior, they immediately yell at them, \”How can you touch there? It\’s so dirty.\” \”You are not allowed to touch these places. Please touch them again.\” Not a good boy\”… These reactions are all blocking the child\’s sexual development and budding, and fighting against the natural state of life. Just like trying to stop a child from walking, he will eventually learn to walk, but if he wants to walk steadily, he will pay a higher price than ordinary people because of your previous attempts to stop him. Teach your children to protect their privacy. However, matters related to sex are private after all. I remember a mother asked me. She found that her daughter liked to squeeze her thighs and said that the lower part was itchy. Sometimes she would press it with her hands, and even ride on her legs to press it. What should she do? I said just tell her that these are normal feelings, stop shaming or reprimanding the child, and teach her to protect her privacy. For three or four-year-old children, you may not understand the concept of \”protecting privacy\”, so gently tell her: \”It is your own secret if you like to clamp your thighs. You cannot let others see it, and you should not do it in public places.\” , just go to a place where no one can see it.\” If a child over four years old has understood the body structure and his own private parts, you can tell him directly: \”This is your privacy, don\’t expose it. In front of others.\” The sexual development of most children before the age of 6 is at an infantile stage. They do not understand the sexual rules of adult society, do not understand the sexual morality of adult society, and are not subject to the moral constraints of adult society. They are just developing according to their own life instincts. Respecting an independent individual is also reflected in respecting their life and development. Never label your children as \”shameless\”, \”dirty\” or \”shameless\” and shout about them everywhere. Because the stricter the prohibition, the deeper the guilt and the stronger the urge to indulge. In \”Summerhill School\”, Principal Neil once said: Our inability to accept ourselves mainly starts in childhood, and a large part comes from the guilt of masturbation. During Xia Shan’s decades as principal, I found that unhappyHappy children will have a deep sense of guilt about masturbation. Eliminating this sense of guilt is the most important step in leading problem children onto the road to happiness. In fact, what we got from our parents when we were children is unhealthy shame about sex. This shame affects the quality of our lives. It’s time for our generation of parents to break the shackles of this inheritance.