Are you also driven crazy by these behaviors of baby bears?

Friends were having a get-together with their children on the weekend, and A angrily talked about her little girl Yuanyuan’s problem of eating. When A got home from get off work, 3-year-old Yuanyuan was having dinner. Seeing her mother, Yuanyuan, who was sitting in the dining chair, became restless: sometimes she said she didn\’t want to eat vegetables, sometimes she asked her mother to hold her to eat, and sometimes she acted coquettishly and asked her mother to feed her. A decisively refused, and Yuanyuan burst into tears. The grandmother on the side couldn\’t bear to see such a scene, and started to talk about her daughter: \”How can you feed her? I won\’t ask you to feed her for the rest of her life.\” But A did not buy her own mother\’s fault. When Yuanyuan saw this, she cried hoarsely. Grandma\’s self-esteem was frustrated and she hid in the bedroom to wipe her tears. A had no choice but to feed Yuanyuan to ease family conflicts. However, in the next few days, Yuanyuan began to ask endlessly, \”Mom, feed! Mom, feed!\” It was good to eat independently at first, but now she \”faded into a little baby.\” A has a big head. She didn\’t know that Yuanyuan\’s behavior was completely normal, and was called \”behavioral regression\”! Regarding behavioral regression, mothers must understand why children who are originally very independent in eating must be fed? Why does a baby who could walk never move his feet again after falling? Why does a baby who speaks fluently suddenly become stumbling? Why is it that after being ill, I don’t want to show off the new skills I originally learned? Why do children who can clearly express their desire to defecate begin to pee their pants when they enter kindergarten? Why do I become anxious and lose my temper when I learn new skills such as buttoning buttons and using chopsticks? In fact, this is a special psychological state that is very common in children aged 0 to 6 years old, called the behavioral regression period. It is a manifestation of children\’s emotional dependence. It is normal for this situation to occur in the short term. Why regressive behavior? I just want you to accompany me! I asked A, do you spend less time with your children recently? A nodded and admitted: \”There are many projects in the company recently. I leave early and come home late every day. Yuanyuan eagerly looks forward to her mother coming back every day. Only the parent-child time before going to bed really belongs to the two of us.\” In the past, he would read and do things with Yuanyuan every day after get off work. As a crafty mom, I’ve been very busy lately. Yuanyuan will naturally seek her mother\’s attention through the behavior of \”feeding\” to satisfy her emotional needs. In this case, the mother only needs to give the child a warm hug, let the child understand that the mother will accompany her and love her as before, help the child through the anxiety period, and accept her behavior with tolerance. I\’m preparing to adapt again. Classmate Zhe is a child who speaks very early. When other children say a word, he can already say phrases like \”chicken wing root\”. But around the age of two and a half, he actually developed a stuttering phenomenon. For example, he would repeat the same word several times, or he could not speak a simple word clearly. Because I was sure that the child had no physical problem, I was relatively calm. No matter how many times he repeated it, I listened patiently to what he had to say. For example, one time, classmate Zhe was so anxious that he talked about lions, lions… lions… lions… lions… lions, and he didn\’t finish talking for a long time. He was so anxious that he almost stamped his feet. I picked him up, held him gently in my arms, and silently encouraged him. Finally, the little guy actually came up with his own trick: lion… lion… lion… 1, 2, 3, lion! Look, the child will use his ownPrepare again in your own way. This period lasted for about a month and a half, after which classmate Zhe\’s language exploded. When a two- or three-year-old child stutters temporarily, most of the time it is because the child wants to express too much, but the mouth cannot keep up with the speed of the brain, so there will be a temporary pause. At this time, parents must be patient and wait for them to express themselves, and then prompt their children when they need our help; let alone labeling their children as \”stuttering\”. I don’t get used to it! A few days ago, I took classmate Zhe back to his hometown. Neighbors and relatives paid special attention to him. People he had never met before were also asked to call him grandma, uncle, grandpa, etc. When he didn\’t call him, his relatives teased him and said, \”It doesn\’t look like you came from a big city.\” Baby!\” Classmate Zhe, who was originally outgoing, gradually became very clingy to me and always wanted me to hold him tightly, like a baby. Some children who have just entered kindergarten will chew their fingers, bite their lips, or even wet their pants. When the familiar environment suddenly changes, babies are filled with fear of the unknown. In order to relieve their anxiety, they will find an outlet on their own. Once a sense of security is established in the new environment, the symptoms will disappear on their own. For example, when classmate Zhe returned to his grandma\’s house for the third time, he took the initiative to go out and play with his older brothers and sisters because he had already made an impression on the neighbors. Woo hoo, mom, I want to learn but I can\’t… When classmate Zhe first learned to use chopsticks, he was less than one and a half years old, and he had just learned to eat with a spoon. Just watching adults use chopsticks makes me curious. I bought him children\’s chopsticks, which are less difficult, but still difficult for children under one and a half years old. When classmate Zhe couldn\’t pick up things, he would cry, lose his temper, and throw chopsticks to express his frustration. The same goes for when learning to unzip or pull up pants. Use the baby\’s crying behavior to express your frustration and turn to others for help. In this case, we should not tease the children and tell them they are stupid or too slow. What we have to do is to demonstrate the operation essentials and let the children try it several times. And, when your children are frustrated, tell them: \”Mom and Dad also learned for a long time when they were children. Last time you couldn\’t tell your left and right feet clearly, but now you have made great progress.\” Encouragement is as important as giving them space to try and ponder. Do you still love me? A friend told me something that she could not forget for many years. In the 1990s, it was very popular to sing KTV at home, and her family also bought a set. A cousin who sang very well often went to her house, and her father would make her sing non-stop, praising her for her good singing! Although she could sing every day, her desire to sing was particularly strong at that time. But every time I went over to request a song, my father told me that I was ignorant. As time went by, she began to be very unfriendly to her cousin, getting angry, aggrieved, crying… As a result, she was naturally said to be too ignorant by adults, but she said that she only had one thought at that time: Why is my father so nice to my cousin? Why do everyone only hang around my cousin? China is a country of etiquette. We are always extra polite, tolerant and caring for children who come to our home. With the liberalization of the two-child policy, many older babies also have regressive behaviors. They begin to grumble and become uncooperative in various ways. They also want to re-experience the behaviors of younger babies, such as drinking milk from a bottle, eating with a spoon, and using a second child to eat. s things. This is \”jealousy\”? of course not. The famous American child psychologist Rudolf Drakes explained how children observe and think: Children are experts in observation, but they are prone to making mistakes when understanding what they observe. Then they often use these wrong understandings and conclusions when searching for their own position and sense of value. Therefore, these \”jealous\” behaviors in the eyes of adults are just children seeking attention. For example, when a friend sees his father being nice to his cousin, he wants to lose his temper to gain attention; when the eldest baby sees the second baby crying, peeing, or having a bowel movement, his mother will respond quickly, so he thinks of himself crying and peeing like his younger brother or sister. Pants will also draw mom’s attention to herself. As for the \”baby behaviors\” of older babies, let them experience them to their heart\’s content. As long as you give them enough care, sooner or later they will find those pediatric actions too boring and give up directly.