Children who are difficult to take care of in childhood are often the most promising when they grow up

There are often mothers complaining in the background that the children at home are too difficult to take care of. They are like a pony with horns, both stubborn and prickly. He did whatever he wasn\’t allowed to do, and even if he couldn\’t see it, he dared to go to the house and uncover the tiles. I was beaten and scolded, but the child was still so naughty. Sometimes as long as his stubborn temper rises, no one can do anything to him. Parents are exhausted when their children are too naughty and have too many \”naughty ideas\”, but this is not a bad thing. Some people say, \”The more difficult a child is to raise, the smarter he is!\” Professor Li Meijin also said: \”It is not a bad thing to raise a child, but it is a reflection of the child\’s intelligence.\” If you have a \”stubborn child\” at home, please take good care of it. He has a sharp tongue. Allow him to speak freely as long as it does not involve issues of principle. If you guide your child\’s stubborn temper well and transform his \”stubbornness\” into \”toughness\”, it will be easier to make a difference in the future. Stubbornness is the awakening of a child\’s self-awareness. When you find that you have raised a \”stubborn baby\”, you will find that as long as the child believes in something, even nine cows can\’t get it back. No matter what the weather is, if you want to wear a skirt and go out to play, you must stick to her; if you ask him to eat first while he is painting, he will not eat until he finishes painting; if he is not able to play with Lego building blocks and you want to help, he Not happy yet, even if I cry, I have to finish it myself. A stubborn child looks stubborn, but is actually a \”blue chip\”. If parents educate them properly, the huge energy hidden in their children will be stimulated and benefit them throughout their lives. However, many parents are not aware of this and think that their children are stubborn because they do not listen to discipline. Many times our first reaction is to think about how to train our children. The latest and most complete 2023 [Kindergarten, Junior High and High School] premium VIP course catalogs from famous teachers in various disciplines on the entire network, click to view now! And this can easily lead to two extremes: one is that the child succumbs and becomes an \”obedient\” baby, doing whatever the parents say, but those precious qualities of the child also disappear; the other is The child has become more \”naughty\” than before, willful, naughty, and mischievous. Wherever there is oppression, there is resistance, so he has truly become a \”rebellious\” child in the eyes of adults. In fact, children\’s stubbornness stems from the germination and development of self-awareness. Children\’s \”self-awareness\” is always misunderstood by parents, which causes a lot of trouble and misunderstandings. For example, after some children enter the sensitive period of self-awareness, their tempers are a bit weird and irritable, and they rarely follow their parents\’ wishes. If parents do not understand the expression of their children\’s \”self-awareness\”, they will think that this is their child\’s \”rebellion\”. Generally speaking, \”self-awareness\” sprouts when a child is about 1-2 years old, and develops in depth around the age of 3. When children are 2 years old, they use their \”temper\” more to fight against their parents; when they are 3 years old, the brain\’s knowledge reserve continues to increase, and it will transform from \”temper\” to \”viewpoint\” and enter a higher level of self-awareness development. . At this time, the child\’s language expression ability has also been developed to a great extent, and what appears to the parents is a \”stubborn baby\” who is very articulate. Stubborn children are more assertive. Respecting the child\’s \”stubbornness\” is protecting the child\’s sense of assertiveness. german psychologist seaCha, conducted a famous experiment: he followed and observed 100 children between the ages of 2 and 5 who had a strong sense of resistance and 100 children who did not have this sense for more than ten years. The results found that 84% of children who had a strong sense of resistance in childhood were strong-willed, independent-minded, and able to independently analyze, judge things and make decisions when they grew up. Among children who have no sense of resistance, only 26% can stick to themselves as adults; the remaining 74% have no independent opinions and cannot bear independent responsibilities. A stone without edges and corners is destined to fail to stand out. A child who has no independent opinion and no creative ability will definitely not be able to achieve great things. Pioneers of any era and field often insist on their own opinions. They dare to challenge authority and use actions to confirm their ideas. Only when parents respect their child\’s stubbornness can they give him the strength to insist on his own opinions. Being assertive is not only an attitude towards life, but also a kind of survival ability. Unfortunately, it is the parents who destroy this ability in their children. Think about it, when we see a child behaving \”stubbornly\”, what is the most common thing we say to our child? \”No, no, no, no,\” we often deny our children\’s words. How many times have we said this? When a child\’s self-awareness awakens, he will often say \”no\” to show his parents the attitude of \”I want to make my own decisions.\” If parents stop or criticize children when they make decisions, the children will feel incompetent and doubt themselves. Over time, children will be afraid to make decisions, afraid of their parents\’ blame, afraid of bearing the consequences, and even more afraid that their parents will no longer love them. Gradually, children dare not speak out their inner thoughts and cannot respect their own feelings. They are repressed, obedient, and ingratiating. When they grow up, they lack independent judgment, have no independent opinions, and follow what others say. Stubborn child, this way of guiding a child who will become better in the future is too stubborn. How should I guide him? 1. Adjust your mentality and respect your children. Faced with \”stubborn\” children, parents must adjust their mentality. No matter how noisy their children are, they are their own children. If they hit their children, they will feel pain in their own hearts. Respect the child\’s \”self-awareness\” expression. If the child\’s self-awareness is not fully developed or encounters too much resistance during the development process, the child will lose confidence. Some will even use more rebellious ways to prove themselves. 2. Control your temper and listen to your children more. Children do not obey how to do? The method many people adopt is to lose their temper at their children, such as yelling, punishing, etc. You must know that the development of self-awareness will make children more independent. Inappropriate behavior of parents can easily cause parent-child conflicts. Stubborn children need their parents to listen. The reason why they are stubborn and refuse to listen is because they have formed an opinion of their own in their hearts. This view leads to their lack of cooperation. Children need their parents to spend more time listening. When parents listen, they can first identify with their children\’s behavior or thoughts. This will help the children calm down, and parents can also discover the reasons through their children\’s stories. 3. Use rules to restrain yourself from saying \”no\”. If stubbornness is emotional, then rules are rational. For the stubbornChildren can have tempers and willful behaviors, but parents must control some issues of principle. And this requires establishing rules for the children in advance. When establishing rules for your children, avoid using words such as \”you can\’t\” and \”you must.\” Parents can discuss with their children the formulation of rules, what matters can be decided by themselves, what matters can be consulted by parents, and what matters must not be done, so that children have a sense of boundaries. The establishment of rules should be simple, specific, and clear, and should be established bit by bit, not too many. Using rules to restrain children is more acceptable than rejecting them directly. Therefore, children may have naughty or stubborn behaviors when they are young. Parents must be more patient and understanding, and this may be a sign of their children\’s intelligence. Such children are difficult to take care of when they are young, but they will be more promising when they grow up. The sooner parents understand it, the sooner their children will benefit.