Education before the age of six will teach you this ability. The child will be confident and the mother will be very worry-free.

During the Chinese New Year, the family gathers for dinner. A relative’s three-year-old child can drink from a cup, eat by himself, and dress and shoes by himself. They look so elegant in raising children. My child is also very smart and can recite many Tang poems, but every time it’s time to eat, he always It’s a parent-child battle. He wants to eat by himself but he eats messily. What he feeds is picky and he can’t give up the bottle. I asked my relatives how they did it, but they always said there was no secret. Moms who also want to raise their children elegantly need answers! Abilities in children\’s development that are easily overlooked. The learning abilities of young children are more amazing than parents imagine. However, we often focus children’s learning on cognitive learning: learning to recognize words, memorize poems, identify colors, etc., while neglecting the development of this key ability. The best time to cultivate this ability is before the age of six. As long as children learn this ability, parenting can indeed be like eating sugar cane, making parents easier and easier. It also has a vital impact on children\’s future studies in school. What does the development of children\’s abilities include before the age of six? The book \”Chinese Parenting Encyclopedia\” (published by Parent-Child World), jointly written by a team of hundreds of pediatricians, nurses, nutritionists and early childhood education experts in Taiwan, mentions that the development of infants and young children can be divided into six major areas. These six areas The development areas are closely related to each other, including gross motor, fine motor, language understanding and expression, cognitive learning, interpersonal and social life, and self-care ability. Among these six areas, the one that is easily overlooked by parents is the ability to take care of oneself. What is self-care ability? Simply put, it is the ability to take care of yourself, such as holding a bottle, drinking water, eating with a spoon, brushing teeth, dressing, wearing shoes, etc. A child who has the ability to take care of himself is independent, confident, brave and responsible. According to Montessori\’s \”absorptive mind\” theory, the best period for developing good habits is before the age of six. The self-care abilities and habits established at this stage will be internalized and become part of the child. In other words, efforts made before the age of six can make parenting as sweet as eating sugar cane. When the children go to school, parents no longer have to play the role of servants or bookboys. They help their children collect school bags, organize school supplies, and even help their children every day. You have to feed him… Teacher Li Kunshan, who has a doctorate in early childhood education at Southern Illinois University in the United States, also often reminds that it is very important to cultivate children\’s self-care and autonomy before the age of six, because it has a great influence on the development of children\’s self-confidence. Relevance. Learning this ability will make children feel independent, capable of getting things done, capable of taking care of themselves, and capable of taking care of others. how should I do it? Teacher Li Kunshan shared that the method is very simple: 1. Lead the child 2. Give him skills 3. Let him practice. The teacher personally demonstrates how to do it in the video, please click to watch. Audio-visual lecture by Dr. Li Kunshan in Early Childhood Education: 3 methods to cultivate children’s vitality (video) If you want to learn well in the future, your self-care ability must be well established before the age of six. Liao Shengguang, the CEO of Qiwei Concentration Education Center with more than ten years of clinical experience and known as \”Teacher Guangguang\” to children, has been observing the development of children from zero to fifteen years old in the clinic for a long time and found that they haveChildren with self-care ability have better learning efficiency in elementary school and high school than children without self-care ability. However, the more worrying situation is that \”the living abilities of children are deteriorating now,\” said Su Xiuting, an occupational therapist at the Child Development Joint Assessment and Early Treatment Center of Enzhu Gong Hospital. After children go to school, they come here because of learning disabilities or attention problems. After seeking medical consultation, many of them were assessed to have insufficient development of self-care ability in infants and young children. For example, when you are two years old, you can drink milk from a cup, but when you are three years old, you still have to suck from a bottle. Liao Shengguang also pointed out that many life abilities are actually closely related to learning efficiency. For example, many families face homework battles: primary school students write too slowly or poorly. After evaluation, it is usually due to weakness in the small muscles of their fingers or the muscles in their wrist joints. The reason for the lack of development in these two areas is the eating habits in childhood. He observed that it is now rare for young children to eat with bowls in hand, because parents are worried about poisonous plastic bowls that children can hold, and are afraid of breaking them if they use porcelain bowls, while stainless steel bowls are too heavy and tiring for children to hold, so it is common for young children to eat. Eat with your mouth and a bowl while lying down. Otherwise, it is fed by the mother or elders. The child only needs to open his mouth. However, eating with a bowl is the most natural and best exercise for the wrist joint muscles. Since the ability to take care of oneself is so important to children and the method is not complicated, why do many families fail to do it? Parent-Child World reporters interviewed experts in various fields and summarized four key points after comprehensive analysis. Experts unanimously believe that the current parenting environment has four major obstacles that are not conducive to the development of children\’s ability to take care of themselves: Obstacle 1: Do not believe that children have the ability to take care of themselves. Taking care of yourself is an innate desire and instinct.\” Tim., the most respected Montessori educator in the United States. Tim Seldin points out in his book \”Montessori at Home\” that children are born with the ability to take care of themselves. However, parents often ignore their children\’s desires and do not believe that such a young baby has the ability to take care of himself. A two-year-old boy came to “ivy’s house life parent-child space”. As soon as he entered the door, he rushed to the sink that was at his height, turned on the faucet, listened to the gurgling sound of water, and started playing with the water excitedly. I only heard my mother scolding me from the side: \”I told you not to play with water, why didn\’t you listen? Look, there was water everywhere. I told you not to play, but you still played…\” Montessori from Zero to Three Years Old Zhuang Jianyi, the founder of \”ivy\’s house life parent-child space\” who is famous for child-friendly parenting methods, found that this child is usually restricted from \”exploring\” or using the faucet at home, so every time he comes here, his first goal is to rush to the sink. So, she walked to the little boy and told him softly: \”Do you want to wash your hands? This is to turn on the faucet, this is to turn off the faucet. You can use this piece of soap to wash your hands, rub your hands like this, and then use water to make bubbles Rinse clean.\” During her personal demonstration of how to use the faucet, \”the little boy\’s eyes told me that he was very focused and willing to learn. In fact, after I told him how to wash his hands, he also did a good job.\” Zhuang Jianyi said that because parents do not believe that their children can do it, they do not do anything for their children.Children create opportunities for practice, and there is less personal demonstration that is most needed for education before the age of six. The fact is that from the earliest days of life, children desire to learn skills that make them independent. Wu Yuebing, the director of Ideal Garden, believes that if babies can be helped to eat by themselves from the time they can sit, and a suitable learning environment is prepared for babies, babies will be able to do well. When she saw the one-year-old child\’s surprised smile on his face because he could hold a small cup and successfully drink his first drink of water, \”I knew his confidence in himself had been established at this moment,\” she says. Obstacle 2: The pace of life is fast. There are too many dual-income families with \”faster\” parents (50%), which makes the pace of life of modern small families fast. Ye Yujing, associate professor and director of the Department of Early Childhood Education at Chiayi University, observed that modern parents are the most common The instruction given to young children is \”Hurry up.\” After getting up, you need to eat breakfast quickly, put on clothes and shoes quickly, and carry your schoolbag quickly… But children\’s abilities can only be developed in \”slow work\”. Ye Yujing pointed out that many life abilities are stimulated by the senses. , the touch of dressing, the sight and taste of eating, and young children use their senses to learn. Children need more time to feel, and more time to operate and practice these abilities. \”Because they are in a hurry, are afraid of trouble, and are afraid of making the house dirty and having to clean up, many parents simply do it for their children,\” Su Xiuting said. In the pursuit of temporary convenience and ease, they deprive their children of learning opportunities. She once saw a primary school student at a wedding banquet who wanted to be fed by his mother when eating. She also encountered a college student who asked his mother to accompany him to bed at night and \”did too much\” to help the child. The price parents will have to pay in the future may be the habit of facing disability in life. Baby, not only does it hurt the child, but it also hurts you. Try to adjust the pace of family life and give your children some room to practice eating by themselves and buttoning their own buttons. \”The return on investment in life education is very high. If you work hard, you will get rewards,\” Su Xiuting said. It takes half a year to teach children to eat by themselves. After drinking the wedding wine, mom can enjoy the food easily and chat with friends elegantly. What\’s more, children\’s learning speed is more amazing than adults imagine. A five-year-old child once came to Su Xiuting\’s clinic. She asked the child to practice tying his own shoelaces when wearing shoes. Instead of asking his mother to tie them every time, he should do it once a week. After a month, he would be able to tie his own shoelaces. Another time she had a meal with a mother and her two-year-old child. During the meal, the child was bored and played with the buttons of his mother\’s coat. He was also highly interested in inserting the buttons into the holes and kept repeating the buttoning action. Two hours after eating a meal, the child can already button buttons proficiently. (Photo by Daddy-David @ flickr) Obstacle 3: Ignoring life skills is the most basic ability for learning. Life self-care is not as valued by parents as other learning areas such as mathematics, English, and Chinese. \”Many children seek medical treatment only after they develop learning difficulties or attention problems after entering kindergarten or even elementary school,\” Su Xiuting said. Zhuang Jianyi also found that many children between one and three years old came to seek help after their mothers encountered children who were not eating or sleeping well.However, they did not expect that they need to understand the key development of infants and young children\’s living abilities \”in advance\” before the child\’s developmental age. Self-care is related to children\’s cognition, movement, attention, and even behavioral attitude and other character development, as well as emotional development. Liao Shengguang believes that the most basic ability in learning is the ability to take care of oneself. From the perspective of the cognitive ability that parents are most concerned about, wearing clothes is related to the ability to distinguish. From identifying the front and back of clothes, to the length and shortness, and then to the matching of colors, they all help children develop their ability to distinguish. Bow shoelaces, which have been replaced by devil\’s felt, can help children develop the concept of space. These abilities will be used in future mathematics learning. Obstacle 4: Holding inappropriate expectations for children. “How come you can’t even eat, so it’s all over your body.”, “Why can’t you hold a cup steadily? If the water spills, you clean it up yourself.” Su Xiuting Ye Yujing and I have seen many mothers treat their children who want to learn to take care of themselves in this way. The ability to take care of oneself cannot be achieved in one step. It is necessary to recognize and understand the development of children\’s abilities, and to help children develop the abilities they should have at that age at different stages of development. Taking eating as an example, a child must start by \”playing\” with food with his hands. By grabbing food with his hands, the baby is already practicing the small muscle abilities of his hands, which will help him learn to hold a spoon later. Pointing the food on your hands to your mouth also trains your hand-eye coordination, and can shorten the learning process of using a spoon to put food in your mouth. Wu Yuebing reminds parents that the ability to take care of themselves is not something that can be achieved overnight. It is piled up layer by layer like a spiral. If the development of the previous stage is really achieved, it will assist the development of the next stage on a certain basis. It is a Progressive process. Parents’ excessive and inappropriate expectations of their children will frustrate the children’s natural willingness to explore and learn. In fact, it is not difficult to help children develop self-care abilities and establish good living habits before the age of six. As long as you believe that children can do it, choose to do the right things at the right time, grasp the key development of children at each stage, and create an environment for them to With child practice, every child can eat well, sleep well, dress well, put away toys, and quit diapering. The following information is excerpted from the \”Chinese Parenting Encyclopedia\” (Parent-Child World Publishing) on ​​the development of children\’s self-care abilities at each stage of growth: children aged 0 to 1: use their hands to explore the environment, can grab things and stuff them into their mouths, and can He eats biscuits and puts small things into bottles. Will try to take off his hat himself. Children aged 1 to 2 years old: Hold their own cup with both hands and drink water. When his parents dress him, he will stretch out his hands or legs to complete the action. Will try to open the bottle cap by myself and get what I want. You can take off your clothes and peel off the candy wrappers yourself. Children aged 2 to 3 years old: more autonomous and able to use a spoon to eat by themselves. The coordination of the two hands is also more flexible, and I know how to pour the water in the cup into another cup. Know how to wash and dry your hands. When they are ready to go out, they will also start to put on their own shoes without laces. 3 to 4 years oldChildren: Can put on clothes by themselves, including shoes, socks, coats, etc., and will also begin to try to open or button larger buttons. Start learning the steps of brushing your teeth and being able to spit out mouthwash. Children aged 4 to 5 years old: You can use a spoon to cut soft foods such as cakes and puddings. When it comes to putting on and taking off clothes, I can handle smaller buttons, I won’t put clothes on the wrong front and back, and I can comb my hair by myself. You can complete all the steps of brushing your teeth by yourself. Children aged 5 to 6 years old: You can use chopsticks to pick up food, and when wearing shoes, you can also put on your left and right feet. They are more independent and can wash their hands, brush their teeth, wash their faces, bathe, dry their bodies, put on their own clothes, and are more capable of taking care of themselves. (Consultation: Li Kunshan, Ph.D. in Early Childhood Education at Southern Illinois University, USA; Professor Zeng Meihui of the Department of Occupational Therapy at National Taiwan University; Associate Professor and Department Chair of the Department of Early Childhood Education at Chiayi University; Ye Yujing; CEO of Qiwei Mindfulness Education Center; Liao Shengguang; Joint Assessment of Children’s Difficulties at Nance Hospital Occupational therapist Su Xiuting of the morning treatment center, Wu Yuebing, director of Ideal Garden, Zhuang Jianyi, founder of \”ivy\’s house life parent-child space\”, and Zhou Huihua, founder of Montessori parent-child classroom.)