How to improve your child’s self-esteem by avoiding these 4 things

How strong is the child\’s self-esteem? I once saw such a video: http://www.doudehui.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/11/82ddaf34b257c84.mp4 A 5-and-a-half-year-old boy was told by the teacher that he had gained weight during an online class. He couldn\’t bear it. I cried aggrievedly, stood up, cried and exercised at the same time. We always think that children don’t understand anything. In fact, when children are very young, their self-esteem has already begun to sprout. Research shows that children around the age of 2 will begin to care about adults\’ evaluations and will strategically demonstrate what is cute, valuable, praiseworthy, or the opposite. As a child grows, feedback and evaluation from adults will affect the child\’s self-esteem and thus shape the child\’s behavior. Educator Suhomlinsky said: \”Children\’s dignity is the most sensitive corner of the human mind. Protecting children\’s self-esteem is to protect children\’s potential power.\” Self-esteem will make children love themselves more, pay attention to maintaining the dignity of their personality, and in adversity Have the will to work hard and strive for self-improvement. If a child\’s self-esteem is destroyed, he or she will easily develop a negative mentality of \”breaking the jar and breaking the pot\” and giving up on himself, or he may become rebellious and deliberately go against his parents and teachers. Therefore, in the process of educating children, even when the child makes mistakes or performs poorly, care should be taken to protect his self-esteem in communication and discipline. In this way, children will feel the respect and trust of their parents, have the motivation to change, and develop in a positive direction. In life, there are some common behaviors that can easily damage children\’s self-esteem, and parents should try to avoid them. What are the 26 episodes of super nice Chinese historical stories with 26 mp3s? Criticism and preaching regardless of the occasion. The ancient saying goes: \”You should be careful of those who blame others for their faults. If you don\’t blame others, if you regret it, you won\’t be blamed.\” There is no blame at night, no blame for eating and drinking, no blame for celebrations, no blame for sadness, no blame for illness.\” It talks about young children who have made mistakes and should be careful when blaming them. If they don\’t blame them in front of everyone, they should feel ashamed. Don’t blame when you regret, don’t blame when you are at night, don’t blame when you eat, don’t blame when you are celebrating, don’t blame when you are sad, don’t blame when you are sick. It was summed up by later generations as \”the seven things you should not do to teach your children\”. Among them, criticizing and teaching children in public is most likely to damage their self-esteem. Under the eyes of everyone, what children remember is not the truths told by their parents, but the embarrassment and shame from which they can\’t escape, which becomes a lifelong psychological shadow. If things go on like this, children will only become more and more rebellious, disobedient to discipline, and have low self-esteem. I know a mother who has always been dissatisfied with her child\’s unwillingness to say hello. Every time relatives and friends come to the house and the child doesn\’t make a sound, she will lose her temper in front of everyone: \”Are you mute? You can\’t call people.\” Ah!\” \”How many times have I said this, how can such an adult not be polite at all?\” \”Look at this child, what\’s the use?\” She believes that if you criticize a child in front of many people and let him know that he is embarrassed, the child will Long memory. However, the result is that the child becomes more reticent and never says hello to anyone from elementary school to junior high school. Mr. Hu Shi once said when recalling his mother’s family education: “My mother controlled me very strictly.A loving mother and a strict father. But she never scolded me or hit me in front of others. \”When criticizing children, it is best to close the door and be alone with them. Parents know how to save face for their children and protect their self-esteem, so that education can achieve better results. There was once a person on the Internet who publicized children\’s privacy and embarrassing things everywhere. Topic: Why don’t children want to say anything to their parents when they grow up? One of the answers resonated with many people: “What I told my parents as a secret, in a blink of an eye, all the relatives and friends around me knew about it. From then on, I I don\’t want to tell them anything. \”Many people have had this experience. They mustered up the courage to share their concerns with their parents in the hope of receiving understanding and comfort, but in the end they were treated as a joke by their parents, something to talk about after dinner, and discussed with outsiders. This kind of behavior will really make children I was very hurt, and gradually became disappointed with my parents. In fact, very young children have a sense of shame. They don’t want others to know some of the embarrassing things they have done and their little secrets. For example, they wet the bed, were discovered by their parents while taking money from the family, and liked classes. A classmate in the school was criticized by the teacher for doing bad things… The child is willing to tell his parents out of trust in his parents. Parents have the responsibility to help their children keep secrets and protect their privacy, instead of spreading it everywhere because they think it is fun and interesting. . No matter how young a child is, he or she will have this inner consciousness: I don’t like to be “uglified” in front of outsiders, and I hope to be respected in front of others. At home, especially in front of outsiders, if you don’t let your children make a fool of themselves or lose face, they will It is beneficial for children to develop an emotion of self-respect, self-love, and self-esteem, and to demand respect from others. Children with this emotion are often full of self-confidence, responsibility, and enterprising spirit in life. Discussing the child\’s privacy in public, taking the child\’s Telling embarrassing things in a happy way will make children feel disrespected, insecure, and no longer trust their parents, which will affect the parent-child relationship. Don\’t think that children don\’t understand anything because they are young. Only by respecting children\’s feelings and privacy can they win their respect. and trust. Devaluing and suppressing children. As children grow up, they will inevitably be accompanied by making mistakes, getting into trouble, and being disobedient, which often makes parents angry and crazy. In excitement, parents often speak indiscriminately, Saying many hurtful words, belittling and denying the child: \”Why did I give birth to such a useless person like you? \”You\’re as stupid as a pig. I\’ve taught you this several times!\” \”Look at you, and then look at others.\” \”You are the only one who still wants to be a teacher?\” By then, all the students will be taught badly. \”·······Some parents are afraid that their children will be proud and want their children to be better, so they use \”percussion education\” to motivate their children and rarely give them affirmation. As everyone knows, long-term \”negative comments\” from parents can easily damage the children. For a child\’s self-esteem, he does not think about how to correct mistakes and strive for progress, but falls into self-doubt and denial, losing his positive fighting spirit. Children with damaged self-esteem will also become \”shameless\” and treat their parents badly. They feel numb and self-indulgent due to education and criticism. Bi Shumin once said: \”When a child grows up, he first confirms his own existence from the pupils of his parents. If even the people closest to you ignore your dignity and deny your value, then the child will not be able to see the meaning of his own existence.. \”The king of fairy tales Zheng Yuanjie also pointed out: What parents must not do to their children is belittle them. \”Appreciation can make children grow into towering trees, but belittling can make children wither and deformed. \”Being affirmed and appreciated is a very important psychological need in a person\’s growth process. Children who can have this need met will establish a higher level of self-esteem, self-love, self-confidence, pay attention to maintaining their own image and reputation, and work hard. Become a better version of yourself. Especially evaluations from parents will affect children\’s self-perception and sense of value. Parents should pay attention to their own language, discuss matters as they arise when disciplining their children, and do not deny the child\’s whole person or attack the child\’s personality. Try to maintain emotional stability Communicate with children objectively and rationally, use more positive and positive language, and give children affirmation, and the educational effect will be better. Ignoring and disrespecting children’s emotions and ideas. Many parents have such a wrong mentality: thinking that children are young and cannot Sensible, his feelings and thoughts are insignificant, so he will unconsciously treat the child casually in education. He will ignore the child, talk to the child well when he is in a good mood, and ignore the child directly when he does not want to pay attention to the child; take Not taking the children\’s words and expressions seriously, and not paying attention to the children\’s thoughts and opinions; arranging the children\’s affairs according to their own ideas, and the children have no right to speak or choose… These behaviors reflect the fundamental problems Yes: Parents do not respect their children’s independent personality and do not believe in their children’s potential for growth. Children are born with the need to be noticed and loved. If children often feel ignored and not taken seriously, they will lack a sense of existence, value, and self-esteem. Being hurt affects the healthy development of character and psychology. No matter how young a child is, he should be treated like an adult and respected, so that he can grow into an adult with a sound personality and mature thinking. Specifically, there are the following points : Listen carefully and respond positively when talking to your child; consider your child’s feelings when speaking and doing things, pay attention to his ideas, adopt them if they are reasonable, and explain clearly the reasons for unreasonable ones; allow your children to make their own choices within the scope of safety and on non-principled issues. Make decisions and give him sufficient space to grow freely; trust your child and exercise your child\’s ability to be independent in life. Self-esteem is the basis of a child\’s self-discipline. Parents always hope to cultivate self-disciplined children. In fact, a child\’s self-discipline is closely related to his or her self-discipline. The level of self-esteem is closely related. Children with high self-esteem often have a desire to become better, so they are self-motivated, proactively do what they should do, and gradually develop self-discipline. Children with low self-esteem , usually have a low evaluation of themselves, thinking that they are just not good enough and lack positive motivation, so their performance becomes more and more unsatisfactory. Parents can reflect on whether their usual language and education methods are improving their children\’s self-esteem or improving their children\’s self-esteem. Are they destroying their children\’s self-esteem? In addition to avoiding the above four behaviors that can easily destroy their children\’s self-esteem, parents can also explore more of their children\’s strengths and strengths, encourage their children to try and challenge, and continuously improve their children\’s self-confidence. Guide them with respect, love and trust. Children love themselves, evaluate themselves positively, improve their sense of self-worth, and build appropriate self-esteem.Heart.