Never tell your children about the terrifying power of these psychological suggestion effects.

I once watched a short video and was deeply impressed. In the park, the boy\’s mother asked the little girl to lend the ball to her child to play with, but the little girl refused. At this time, the boy\’s mother said politely: 36 Tips for Parents to Communicate with Their Children HD PDF \”This little sister won\’t lend it to us to play with. This little sister is a stingy person. Let\’s go and ask other children.\” The little girl\’s The mother heard this and immediately said: \”Sister, please lend me 2,000 yuan, huh? No, let\’s go, let\’s go, let\’s not stand next to this stingy aunt.\” The little boy\’s mother said angrily: \”You How can this person talk?\” The girl\’s mother countered: \”It was you who labeled my child first. She doesn\’t want to lend it to you. It\’s her right.\” I have to say, this mother\’s approach is really refreshing. To be honest, it is too common to give negative hints to children by labeling them in life. Looking back at ourselves, we often can\’t help but label our children with various negative labels such as \”drifting, introverted, timid\”. As everyone knows, these negative hints will have an indelible impact on a child\’s life. The famous pediatrician Adele Farber said: \”Never underestimate the impact of your words on your child\’s life.\” In life, whether you say \”awesome\” or \”really stupid\” may have consequences for your children. totally different. These \”hints\” of yours may ruin your child. For children, their parents\’ evaluation is the source of their understanding of themselves. Indiscriminately labeling expressions can hurt people invisibly, affect children\’s evaluation of themselves, and destroy children\’s self-esteem and self-confidence. There is a bloody and tragic case around me. My cousin is a boy who has been a little introverted since he was a child, and he has a stutter in his speech. But boys are always playful and laughing when they are young. One National Day, our family went to my aunt\’s house for a visit. My aunt asked him to say hello to his second uncle. He blushed but couldn\’t hold back a word. At this time, the aunt couldn\’t keep her face and explained hurriedly: \”This child is usually introverted and timid. Look at how old he is. He looks like a fool and can\’t speak well.\” As soon as he finished speaking, there was a burst of laughter in the hall. From that day on, my cousin had two more labels: coward and fool. There are always people who use these two words to \”joke\” with him. Slowly, he became more and more introverted, less willing to say hello to people he saw, and became more and more taciturn, saying very little even to his family members. Time flies, and now I am a mother. When I asked about my cousin a while ago, my mother sighed. He could hardly communicate normally with strangers, and he could no longer study until he graduated from junior high school. He has an autistic personality and cannot find a job. He has been unemployed at home for many years. The negative label placed on my cousin has become a shackles in his life that no one can break. Such children make people feel distressed, but they are never an exception. I once saw a question on Zhihu: \”How much impact will parents with low emotional intelligence have on their offspring?\” One of the highly praised answers said this: If parents randomly label and slap their children, they will give their children a negative mentality. It implies that magnifying the child\’s shortcomings and attacking the child will only make him feel worthless. Then there is a high probability that such a child will be like this respondent when he grows up.Parents close their hearts, dare not approach them, and live with low self-esteem and caution. What is heartbreaking is that many parents unconsciously label their children negatively, but the children remember, complain, and feel pain for a lifetime. Those negative \”hints\” are like wounds that will never heal, reminding children all the time: \”You are not good enough, you are so stupid, you are really bad.\” Children live under the pressure caused by negative labels , eroding one\’s self-esteem and self-confidence, as well as the enthusiasm and pursuit of life. Not labeling is the beginning of respecting children. In the documentary \”Childhood in a Foreign Country\”, reporter Zhou Yijun sat around with a Finnish teacher and talked about how when she was a child, she was told \”your singing is difficult to listen to\”, so she did not dare to sing. thing. The Finnish teachers replied that this is exactly the misunderstanding they try to avoid in the process of educating children. Avoid labeling or defining children just because they do not perform well for a while. After listening, Zhou Yijun asked, if a child hates mathematics and numbers, what should he do? Teachers in Finland said that they would reflect on whether there was something wrong with their own education methods, rather than thinking that there was something wrong with their children. In the Finnish teachers’ outlook on education, we see respect and understanding for children. If a child doesn\’t like math, but is very interested in cars, then use cars to teach. If you like building blocks, then use building blocks to teach, respect the child\’s preferences, respect the child\’s rhythm, and take your time. Chen Danqing has a saying for parents: \”Don\’t judge when a flower has just bloomed, let it grow up and bloom.\” Every child is born with his own characteristics, his own way of looking at life, and his own desire for the world. , they have their own growth rhythm. Therefore, when educating your children, do not immediately label your children with various labels just because they have not done well. If the child is introverted and dare not say hello, then encourage him: \”I know you are a little nervous this time. Be prepared next time. Can we stay with you?\” If the child is naughty and active, play with the puppet. Game to see who can calm down. If the child is a little timid, then stay with the child quietly and be a reassuring support for the child. Don\’t rush to define your child\’s life, but give your child positive guidance, support and respect as you participate in his growth. Children\’s educational cartoon \”Master Chef Xiao Fugui\” full set download [720P high-definition 132 episodes] Faced with children\’s imperfections, not easily defining children, learning to respect children from the heart is a required course for parents. Because only children who are respected can calmly adapt to the rules of this world, give full play to their own advantages, and live a life that truly belongs to them. Give children more positive feedback, and children will be more confident in the future. A scene in the parent-child education variety show \”Dear Little Desk\” is deeply touching. Guest Fu Seo\’er accompanied Xu Jingkai to do his homework. When he saw that he was writing seriously, he praised him: \”Who raised such a good son? I will ask your mother tonight.\” But Kaikai lowered his head and said, \”Mom She says that I am not good, she says that I am not good every day.” In fact, Kaikai is already a “primary school bully” in the eyes of others.\”Child\”, but Kaikai\’s mother is stingy about praising her children. This is because she is worried that her praise will make her children yell, so when others say good things, she says bad things. This behavior of Kaikai\’s mother inadvertently It has caused harm to the child. When Kaikai said \”Mom said I am not good\”, it means that for the child, even his dearest and most beloved mother does not recognize him. As time goes by, he will no longer No matter how confident you are to face the setbacks and problems in life, you no longer believe that you can really do well. On the other hand, as a guest, Fu Seoul, when she noticed that Kaikai became depressed, she immediately used positive words Come to encourage Kaikai: \”Do you know why your mother gives you so much homework? Because you are so smart, it is so easy to do your homework. You can calculate as fast as Teacher Fu, and you can make money in ancient times. \”Fu Seoul\’s positive feedback to Kaikai let him know that if his performance was recognized, he would definitely do well. As expected, after hearing these words, Kaikai became very motivated and completed the homework in one go. This is Giving children positive feedback can produce immediate results. Outside the camera, Kaikai’s mother was pleasantly surprised to discover that her children can complete their homework efficiently and happily. They don’t need to blindly supervise them over and over again. The key is whether they use the correct methods. The method. William James, the master of modern psychology, once said: The deepest desire in people\’s hearts is to be affirmed and praised. This is especially true for children. Positive feedback from parents is recognition and love again and again. At the same time, , parents don’t have to worry that positive feedback will make their children proud and conceited. In the documentary \”Life·Growth\”, education expert Lai Nianhua answered this question very well. She said: \”We do not praise our children excessively; Feedback to the children through what we actually see and what we understand is the most concrete response to the children. \”This requires us to face up to the child\’s performance, praise the child to specific parts, and let the child know what he did well, so he deserves to be praised. Behind every outstanding child, there are parents who give positive feedback in a timely manner. When If parents learn to use positive feedback skillfully to motivate their children, their children will learn to think positively about problems, face them head-on, and become more confident in dealing with people and things. Learn to appreciate and encourage your children, and what your children will give you back will be unexpected surprises. I like a sentence very much: The responsibility of parents is to let their children feel the love of their parents, the vastness of the world, and the joy of life, so as to plant the seeds of love, confidence and hope in their hearts. Let the children have the courage to have them when they are at a low point. The power to face setbacks and avoid collapse. Let children experience the acceptance and trust from their parents, and be more confident to take every step of growth. The world\’s most magical collection of 24 lessons in ultra-clear PDF + video + audio wishes all children , can all have a strong heart and the courage to move forward under the guidance of their parents. I hope all parents can learn to respect their children, not label their children indiscriminately, give their children more positive \”hints\”, and cultivate an excellent child. , and also gained a close and trusting parent-child relationship.

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