No matter how angry you are, don’t say these 5 cruel words to your children! What hurts more than a fist is the tongue

Dear Mom and Dad: I finally plucked up the courage to write this letter to you today. Some words have been hidden in my heart for a long time. Now, I want to say it out loud: Can you please be merciful and stop saying bad things to me? You may not know that these words I often say to me are like needle pricks! \”How big is the matter and you can\’t bear it?\” Dear Mom and Dad, please don\’t blame me blindly when I am bullied or when I have difficulties and ask you for help: \”How big is the matter and you can\’t bear it?\” ?\” \”Why are you so cowardly? Coward!\” \”Stomachache? You deserve it! It must be caused by you eating randomly.\”… During the Chinese New Year, my little cousin came to our house to play, and he insisted on taking away the birthday gift from my grandfather. The gift was a dancing minion. When I refused, he smashed the minion into pieces. I cried and ran to tell my mother that I wanted you to seek justice for me, but you said, \”What\’s the big deal? If it breaks, I can just buy you another one.\” But grandpa is no longer here and will not send any more. This is my second minion. Do you still remember the news that the Peking University tyrant broke off diplomatic relations with his parents for 12 years? A bully from Peking University has blackmailed his parents for many years and refused to go home during the 2012 Spring Festival. Because, he will always remember: when he told his mother that his folder was scratched, what he got was a cold \”Now you know that the outside world is wonderful, right?\” When he got into trouble with his classmates and asked his father for help , what he got was a vicious scolding: \”You must learn to get along with everyone.\” When he was teased in front of his relatives because he couldn\’t peel eggs, what he got was that his parents just ignored him. When I encounter setbacks and difficulties, the first thing I think of is you, mom and dad. I want to talk to you and hear your comfort and concern instead of complaining and scolding. Your criticisms and accusations will only make me feel worse. I can\’t help but wonder, do my parents not love me anymore? I become less and less talkative because I am afraid that whatever I say to you will be wrong. My \”heartfelt words\” Dear Mom and Dad, when I am bullied, when I ask you for help, can you give me a warm embrace? Please stand with me to solve the problem and let me rely on and trust you. \”Do you have any brains? You can\’t even do something as simple as this.\” Dear parents, please don\’t point at my nose and curse loudly when you are helping me with my homework: \”Do you have any brains? You can\’t even do something as simple as this?\” \” Why did I give birth to such a stupid son like you!\” \”How many times have I told you and you still can\’t remember? Do you want to make me mad?\”… You are complaining, \”What evil did you do in your previous life, so you need counseling in this life? \”While you are doing your homework, can you notice my fearful eyes and cautious expression?\” I\’m sorry, I always get the questions wrong. I know you are very angry, but your \”violence\” and \”humiliation\” will only make my brain go blank, and I will make more and more mistakes! I saw a piece of news a few days ago about a mother who got a cerebral infarction from tutoring her daughter in her homework and was hospitalized: I\’m really afraid that one day I\’ll make you sick too. Dear parents, please don’t compare a child’s IQ with your own. You can’t afford to hurt me, and neither can I. (Video from: 嘘巴嘚 self-media platform) Every time you help me with my homework, my eyebrowsIt always wrinkles into a big word \”Chuan\”. I hold the pen nervously, my palms are sweaty, for fear that I will make another wrong word and make you angry again. Sometimes, I can\’t help but scold myself, why am I so stupid, why I just can\’t do it right, why I keep making my parents angry! I know you just hate that iron cannot become steel, but have you ever thought about it? What kind of person will those cutting words make me become? \”Pig brain\” and \”idiot\”, once such labels are attached to me, they will become lingering marks. If things go on like this, I will decide that I am really a fool and an idiot, and I can’t bring myself to do anything, and I will even break things, and become worse and worse. My \”heartfelt words\” Dear Mom and Dad, can you please be more patient and lose your temper less? I heard that too much anger will make you grow old. I will put a warm note on my desk and write: \”Dad, I am so scared when you are angry.\” \”Mom, you are the most beautiful when you are gentle.\” \”My dear! My dear! My dearest.\” \”Yes!\” I hope that when you can\’t help but want to get angry, you can calm down after reading these words. \”You want to make me mad, right?\” Dear Mom and Dad, please don\’t insult me ​​mercilessly when I make a mistake: \”You want to make me mad, right?\” \”Day by day. You just know how to cause trouble for me, what else will you do?\” \”Are you a waste? You can\’t even do this little thing!\”… I still remember the night before yesterday, mom, you just finished mopping the floor, but I accidentally The milk in the cup spilled all over the floor. You rushed to me angrily, pointed at me and scolded me: \”You just want to tire me out on purpose, right?\” I lowered my head and kept crying. Dear mother, I just looked at you. It\’s too hard. I want to bring you a cup of hot milk. Why would you deliberately cause trouble for you? I soiled the floor, so you have to mop it again, I\’m sorry; I accidentally broke your classmate\’s cup, so you have to pay for it, I\’m sorry; I really have no appetite, and I may have to waste a table of dishes you worked so hard to prepare, I\’m sorry… …Dear Mom and Dad, I’m sorry, but I’m not a perfect child. But although I am young, although I am your child, I still have the dignity and pride of being a human being. I once heard the news that a father abroad saw his son addicted to computer games every day, so he became so angry that he put a loaded pistol in front of his son and roared: \”You have the guts.\” Just stop living!\” Unexpectedly, his son actually picked up the pistol and pulled the trigger to end his own life. My \”inner words\” Dear Mom and Dad, can you please stop cursing me unscrupulously. The speaker has no intention of listening, and I will take everything you say seriously, and I will remember everything you do. You can punish me not to watch my favorite cartoons or eat my favorite snacks for a week. You can also tell me how you feel, for example: \”You broke my mother\’s favorite vase, and I was very sad and angry. Have you realized your mistake? Will you run around so recklessly in the future?\” ?\” Seeing you sad makes me feel bad, and I will definitely not make the same mistake again. Or, before you get angry, you can count silently for 30 seconds before you start training me. Maybe you won\’t be so angry. \”Don\’t mess withI\’m so bored today! \”Dear Mom and Dad, please don\’t use me as a punching bag when you are quarreling, angry or in a bad mood: \”Don\’t mess with me, I\’m annoying enough today!\” \”Go away! Don\’t show it in front of my eyes.\” \”Cry. If you cry, just cry. If you cry again, I will sew your mouth shut!\”… Every time you two quarrel, I am so scared, afraid that you will hurt each other, and afraid that I will make you angry if I do something wrong. Dear Dad, I remember the last time you had a fierce argument. Mom rushed out of the door and you were sitting on the sofa drinking. I walked up to you and wanted to persuade you not to drink too much, but as soon as the word \”Dad\” came out of my mouth, , you yelled at me: \”Get out of my way, don\’t be an eyesore in front of me!\” I hid in my bed like a little mouse, secretly shedding tears. I didn\’t dare to cry out, for fear that you wouldn\’t hear me. Happy. But, dad, I don’t know what I did wrong to make you hate me so much; I don’t know what I should do to make you and my mother feel better. I\’m like the kid in this video, full of panic and anxiety. What I’m saying is: Dear Mom and Dad, can you please stop treating me as a punching bag? I am your child, I love and depend on you deeply, please don\’t say harsh words to hurt me again, okay? Even if you really can\’t hold back and say harsh words to me, don\’t worry. If you can squat down and say to me: \”I\’m sorry, kid, I shouldn\’t have said those words just now. They were just angry words, and it doesn\’t mean that I don\’t care. Love you.\” I think I will forgive you. \”Look at other people\’s children, and then look at you!\” Dear parents, please don\’t always pick on me and compare me with other children: \”Look at other people\’s children, and then look at you!\” \”Painting It\’s so ugly, so don\’t waste paper!\” \”Can you give me some encouragement? Earn some face for yourself?\”… Maybe you think that the blow is the driving force for me to keep moving forward. However, that is not motivation, it is full of scars that go deep into the bone marrow! Because I always get my food everywhere, and you always get angry at me: \”How many times have I told you, clamp your chopsticks tightly before eating, why don\’t you change it?\” But, Mom and Dad, don\’t you? You can think about it from another angle: Mom, you know it’s not good to get angry, but how much have you changed over the years? Dad, you know that smoking is bad, and you promised to quit smoking, but have you done it? You all know that exercise has many benefits, but do you go for a run every day? I once heard a teacher say a term in educational psychology called the \”Ongemarie Effect.\” There was a girl named \”Ongemarie\” who was not beautiful at first. However, her family and friends have always given her confidence and encouragement. Everyone said to her: \”You are so beautiful.\” Slowly, the girl became more and more confident. When she looked in the mirror every day, she thought about herself in her heart. Said: \”Actually, you are very beautiful.\” Gradually, the girl became more and more beautiful. You are my dearest parents. What I want most is your recognition and encouragement, and what I want most is to be the pride in your hearts. But your cynicism again and again will only make me feel more inferior and sensitive, making me feel that no matter how hard I try, it is useless. My \”inner words\” Dear parents, can you pleaseShift the light from \”other people\’s children\” to your own children and take a closer look. In fact, I\’m not that bad, am I? If you can always encourage me: \”My child, I am optimistic about you. If you work harder, you will definitely do better!\” I think I will become more confident, more confident, and more hopeful to become better. Get better and better. Dear Mom and Dad, maybe everything I said today is very small, and you will take every word for granted. But every little thing, every seemingly light word, is a sharp knife, poking deeper and deeper wounds in my heart. Dear parents, please use the gentleness of spring breeze and rain to accompany me as I grow up! Dear Mom and Dad, if you still love me, please start by talking to me nicely!