Please, please stop invading your children\’s territory, okay?

I often hear others say that they hope to have free space. This kind of space is not only reflected in objective space, such as a room, a house, an open space, etc., but also in an independent space of thought. Adults have a certain understanding of the above. These pursuits and yearnings for self-space are the same for children. Giving children free space to grow can help them learn tolerance, humility, and understanding. To give children space mentally and not to \”invade\”, the first step is to give them some free time. A-Dong is a very playful boy who does not study hard and needs to be under the supervision of his mother to do his homework every time. In order to correct her son\’s playful habit, A Dong\’s mother came up with a way. In fact, she knew very well that what the child wanted most was free time, so she discussed with A-Dong that if he completed his homework with high quality and quantity and on time after school every day, he would be free to do whatever he wanted with the rest of the time. can do anything. After hearing this, A Dong was indeed very happy and agreed to her mother\’s request without any explanation. From then on, the first thing A Dong did when he came home from school was to do his homework. Even when other children came to play with him, he insisted on finishing his homework first before going out to play happily with his friends. After a period of time, A Dong\’s academic performance not only improved, but his spare time life became much happier than before. Without affecting the child\’s normal learning, giving the child sufficient free time will help the child learn to arrange things independently and allocate his or her time reasonably. At the same time, giving children more free time will also make them happier, which can lay a solid foundation for the cultivation of children\’s creative abilities. In addition, children also need \”alone\” space. I wonder if your child is like the following child: Maomao is 5 years old this year, and he is a very smart child at first glance. But recently, Maomao\’s mother has been a little worried, because she found that Maomao fell in love with \”solitude\” and would often fall into a thoughtful state alone. Several times, her mother saw Maomao sitting alone on the ground, not knowing what she was thinking, with her hands in her hands. He kept playing with it, so he asked him with concern, but Maomao said, \”Nothing was done.\” The mother was particularly confused. She was so close to Mao Mao. Could it be that the child couldn\’t tell his mother what was on his mind? Nowadays, most parents hope from the bottom of their hearts that they can be their children\’s close friends, and they also advocate being their children\’s friends and talking more to their children. However, many parents find that their children still have their own \”little secrets\”. No matter how much adults care for them, they still have their own \”little secrets\”. The children still retain a territory of their own, which they can only enter by themselves. In fact, it is very normal for children to be \”alone\”. \”Being alone\” is by no means just a patent for adults. Children also need to enjoy the time and space of \”alone\”. Moreover, as children grow older, their emotional development will become richer and richer. When alone, children can experience the environment and explain problems in their own way, and they can try to play and solve problems in their own way. Moreover, there are no adults gesticulating around, which ensures that children have the opportunity to rely entirely on their own hands and brain. \”Being alone\” is actually a kind of leisure given to children in time and space. It is a kind of freedom for children\’s soul.By the time, being alone does not mean being lonely. In fact, very young children have this need and ability for spiritual freedom. Research has found that children under 1 year old can play by themselves and can happily be alone while listening to music; as they grow older, children have greater and greater freedom and can actively choose to leave the crowd and stay alone. It is recommended that parents cherish their children\’s innate \”loneliness\”, keep a moderate distance from their children, and give them a space to think and experience. You must know that although parents and children are the closest people, they are still two people after all. A \”distance\” is inevitable and natural. As parents, it is enough to put down your airs and work hard to be friends with your children in life. Do not force your children to share anything with you, and please believe that your children will definitely come to their parents for help if they need it. As their children grow older, many parents will definitely try their best to give their children a certain amount of space and a room of their own. According to psychological research, from the perspective of mental development, letting children sleep in a room by themselves can not only cultivate their independence and autonomy, but also help children develop \”self\” awareness and learn to express their own unique ideas. and respect others. Parents should be very happy if their children take the initiative to sleep in a room alone as early as possible. This means that your children have developed an independent consciousness and can tolerate a short separation from their parents. This will have a positive impact on their future physical and mental development. All have great benefits. The infancy and early childhood period is the earliest critical period in a person\’s life. A person\’s character, personality, values, living habits, and interpersonal relationships as an adult are all closely related to the development of the early childhood period. In addition to genetics, learning and other factors, the adequacy of living space also plays a vital role in the development of children. Therefore, allowing children to have a space of their own is more beneficial to their physical and mental health. Experts also remind that allowing children to have their own space also has a very positive impact on children\’s mental health and personality development. Nowadays, many parents have begun to pay attention to the actual needs of children, and even pay attention to the layout of children\’s rooms. When children have a room that they are satisfied with, they will have a stronger sense of belonging to the home and help them understand their own importance. Nowadays, although many parents can understand the principle of giving their children a living space, they often inadvertently \”invade\” their children\’s territory. Listen to the children\’s voices below: \”My mother always likes to find opportunities to clean my room. I It’s very annoying. The more diligent my parents are, the lazier I become…” “I always remind my parents to knock on the door when they come in, but they often forget, which makes me very depressed.” “I hope the nanny will let me clean the house by myself. \”…\” Someone once did such a survey among school students to find out how many of the current primary school students have tidied their rooms. Afterwards, investigators generally found that those children who did not tidy their rooms did not not tidy their rooms. Instead of wanting to clean up their own room, most of them complain that their parents don’t give them a chance to clean up their room. likeA 10-year-old child said that his house is very big and his parents are busy at work. The toys and books he usually plays with and the books he reads are all taken care of by the nanny at home. Sometimes he also wants to clean up the room, but at the beginning If you do something, the nanny will quickly step in to stop you. Another child proudly said that not only could she clean her own room, she would also help her grandma clean the living room when she was not doing homework. She said that tidying up the room by herself is a kind of exercise for self-care ability and can also reduce the burden on parents. When she sees that the room has become orderly after being tidied by herself, she feels so happy. As the first child said above, the more diligent the parents are, the lazier the children will be. A hard-working mother will usually raise a lazy child. The child\’s laziness is gradually created by the excessive diligence of the parents. When a child has a room of his own, parents should first respect their child\’s right to control their own \”territory\” and start with small things bit by bit to cultivate their children\’s sense of responsibility for their own space. At the same time, they should not \”Bad\” parents who want to \”invade\” their children\’s territory at will must first clarify with their children the principle of \”cleaning their own rooms\”, and \”bad\” parents must actually implement it. They must not \”fish for three days.\” Posted on the internet for two days.\” No matter how messy the child\’s room is, the \”bad\” parents will not interfere, because one day, the child finds that the room is so messy that nothing can be found, or when children come to play at home and they feel very embarrassed, They will take the initiative to start cleaning on their own. Letting children learn to take responsibility as they get used to cleaning their own rooms is the key to our training. Parents can deliberately decorate their children\’s rooms to be \”unconventional\” at home, such as using vibrant colors and laying floors that are completely different from the living room, etc., in order to strengthen their children\’s consciousness that \”this is your place.\” , you are responsible for this\” concept. No matter how messy your child\’s room is, don\’t help tidy it up. Trust your child that they have the ability to tidy up their own room. If the room is too messy and causes trouble, it will also help to make the child aware of the need to keep the room tidy.