Sharing from a top-notch mother: Pay close attention to your children’s primary school years

The entire responsibility for education lies with parents. Such an important task as personality formation cannot be left to schools and ignored. ——Chen Meiling After their children go to school, parents will feel relaxed and think that they can just leave their children to the school and teachers, and parents do not need to bear educational responsibilities. A few days ago, a parent quit the group angrily because the teacher asked the parent to correct his homework. The parent believed that the teacher had not fulfilled his responsibility. Chen Meiling, a doctor of education from Stanford who is known as the \”Legendary Mom\”, said: The entire responsibility of education lies with parents. Such an important task of personality formation cannot be left to the school. Homlinsky once said: \”In a person\’s life, family education accounts for 75%.\” Parents are the first person responsible for their children\’s education, regardless of whether the child is in early childhood or school age. Or during adolescence, parents have the largest proportion of important responsibilities. Parents\’ efforts are directly proportional to their children\’s future. The positive impact of parents\’ current hard work on their children will lead to a better future for their children. Douban\’s high-scoring book list will make children fall in love with reading, which is better than 100 garbage cartoons. Chen Meiling was once a popular singer in the 1980s, as famous as Teresa Teng, but she chose to retire temporarily to get married and have children. Later, he received a doctorate in education from Stanford University and sent all three sons to Stanford University. She completed the transition from idol singer to Ed.D. to legendary mother. Chen Meiling not only raised her children, but also took her son to work at a TV station, which once triggered the \”Anges Controversy\” named after her English name, and was featured in the American \”Times\” weekly. Chen Meiling is often asked what special education she has. In order to answer people\’s questions, she has compiled her own parenting experience into 50 education methods. She emphasized that children’s education is not only the cultivation of learning ability, but also the process of comprehensive personality formation in both physical and mental aspects. Good habits should be developed as early as possible, especially in primary school. Parents pour infinite love into their children. Chen Meiling talked about 8 insights as a parent. One of them is: Parents pour infinite love into their children. Only when they are loved can they trust others. In order to let her children feel the most direct and pure maternal love, Chen Meiling hugs her children tightly every time she comes home from work, so that her children can feel that they are the source of happiness for their parents. Because the couple is busy with work, they plan carefully and save time for their children. When shopping, they choose door-to-door delivery or online shopping. They even go to beauty salons without having their hair done. There is almost no world between two people, and I don’t go to gatherings with friends. Parents strive to give their children selfless love. The three sons feel that they have been surrounded by love since they were young, and they encourage each other in life, creating a good atmosphere of trying to catch up with others. When educating children, husband and wife should work together, especially when making key decisions such as school selection, and listen to each other\’s suggestions. After all, a person\’s power is limited. Only two people can make wise choices that are beneficial to their children by negotiating and communicating and foreseeing the future. A person\’s time is also limited, and it is impossible to participate in the entire life of a child. The participation of the other half is needed so that the child will never feel lonely. After children enter elementary school, their learning patterns and learning environment are very different from those in kindergarten. It is difficult for children to sit for 45 minutes and to learn everything every time.It is difficult to understand the teacher\’s instructions and easily complete the various assignments assigned by the teacher. Parents need to go all out to accompany their children instead of just passing the responsibility to the teacher. During primary school, you need to develop good study habits, learn to arrange your time reasonably, develop the ability to think independently, be self-affirming, learn to socialize independently, and develop a good character. None of this can be done independently. Children before the age of 12 still worship their parents and listen to their parents. During this period, parents work hard to shape their children well and lay a solid foundation for the next few decades. To cultivate children who are eager to learn, we must pay attention to methods. Chen Meiling believes that every child is born with a love of learning. Children don\’t like learning because they think what they learn is useless and boring. Or you can\’t keep up with your studies. The more you study, the more difficult it becomes, and you gradually don\’t like studying anymore. Chen Meiling often discusses with her children why they should learn, the meaning of learning, and the benefits of learning, so that they can understand that learning is their own business and fall in love with learning. Every child has shortcomings, and many parents enroll their children in training classes to make up for their shortcomings, but Chen Meiling did the opposite. She will not let her children deliberately spend more time on subjects they are not good at. Instead, she will encourage them to study subjects they are good at and provide them with favorable conditions. Children gain confidence in subjects they are good at and improve in subjects they are not good at. Chen Meiling believes that children have no self-management ability in primary school, so she always accompanies her children to do homework, not only to check whether the children can do it, but more importantly, to make the children feel that \”learning is not difficult at all and is very happy.\” She previewed and reviewed with her children, and also taught them some recitation methods, with the purpose of helping them develop good study habits. Ye Shengtao said: What is education? In a simple word, it is to develop good habits. A child\’s learning career is all about learning status, learning methods, and learning habits. If you don\’t like to study during elementary school, you will not be able to work hard at the basics. When you advance to junior high school or high school, the subjects will increase and become more difficult, and learning will become more and more difficult. From the time children enter primary school, parents must let their children realize that learning is for themselves, that there is a method to learning, that learning is joyful, and that learning can make the good and the bad not left behind. You need to develop good study habits, including reading the blackboard in class, listening to the teacher, taking notes, reviewing, previewing, doing homework, sitting upright, and writing neatly. Whether it is the first or second grade, or the third or fourth grade, parents should not relax to prevent the slippery slope of the third grade. If you do a good job in primary school, education in middle school and high school will be much easier. Grasp the critical period of children\’s personality formation. Chen Meiling believes that during the critical period of personality formation, parents have the responsibility to let them believe in themselves and expand their potential. The primary purpose of education is self-affirmation, encouraging children, appreciating children, paying attention to children, not comparing with others, so that children can like themselves and thus like others. Chen Meiling does not allow children to be exposed to electronic games before the age of 12. She also recommends that children read books and learn useful knowledge through the Internet. I hope that my children will have dreams that even parents dare not dream of, and urge them to work hard for their dreams. Pay attention to the cultivation of children\’s interests and let them read widely and practice concretely. Let children learn to be grateful and realize that they are lucky. Challenge yourself to whatever you want to do, noFear of failure. Only those with tenacity can go further. However, many parents believe that \”it\’s not too late to make up for the lost situation.\” They send their children to school, leave them alone, take it one step at a time, wait until the teacher gives feedback, and then rush to manage the child. In fact, many times it is too late. Even if there is time, it will take many times the effort and effort of childhood. Many parents feel that there is no cure and want to let it drift with the tide. Many problems occur in adolescence, but they are formed in childhood. Prevention is the right way. Erikson believes that childhood between the ages of 6 and 12 is a conflict between diligence and inferiority. If the crisis at this stage is successfully resolved, the virtue of competence will be formed; if the crisis is not successfully resolved, it will be incompetence. The age of 6-12 is a critical period for personality formation, but children mainly spend time at school during the day and at home at night and on weekends. There are many variables that affect children\’s humanistic environment and social environment, and parents need to provide guidance to help their children form a good personality. The primary school stage cannot be repeated, as it is related to whether the child will be a person with a sound personality and a sound psychological quality in the future. Behind a large number of parenting cases, there is one thing in common. Parents attach great importance to their children’s early education, especially the six years between 6 and 12 years old. These six years are still the time when parents can exert their greatest efforts. After junior high school, the main influence on children will no longer be their parents, and many children will live in school, with very few opportunities to get along with their parents, leaving only educational opportunities for their parents. not much. Parents with adolescent children feel helpless that their children are rebellious and disobedient, one turning to the left and the other to the right. Because children need a sense of belonging more, which cannot be satisfied by their parents. This means that parents must build their children\’s learning, habits, and personality foundation before they are 12 years old. By adolescence, children can view the world more objectively and not go astray. Otherwise, what parents will face is that their children will be endlessly rebellious and their own emotions will be at the lowest point in their lives. Conclusion In the primary school stage, children have reached a leap stage in learning, social interaction, habits, and personality, and everything is uncertain. Parents must seize this stage and help their children establish their three views. In the past 6 years of primary school, if parents lack an overall understanding and have no feasible methods, and just follow their emotions and feelings and educate their children subconsciously, their growth will be delayed.