The first 3 years of life determine your child’s life, you must pay attention to it

Before the age of 3, what children need is a stable person to establish an attachment relationship with, rather than developing adaptability. Every mother feels uneasy, even fearful, when she becomes a mother for the first time. Not only out of love for this child, but also out of understanding of our own development laws as human beings. When your life begins to be tied to another life, you have to be responsible for another life before you understand what is going on with you. This is undoubtedly a kind of pressure. Some mothers see the light of growth in such darkness and the direction they want to go. But there are also mothers who begin to withdraw and give up their motherly rights and responsibilities. I have met many mother friends who have let the elderly or aunts take the lead since their children were born. Their reasons are varied, including finances, family conflicts, their own health, etc. I respect the choices of these mothers and understand the difficulties involved. Life is not easy for everyone. But when facing these children, I still can\’t help but feel sad: a child\’s 0-3 years are really the three years of gold. Although I don\’t believe in Buddhism, I feel that the Buddhist theory of cause and effect is very educational and enlightening – \”Ordinary people are afraid of consequences, but Bodhisattvas are afraid of causes.\” When a child reaches a certain age, it will be very difficult to change that effect. It takes time for seeds to mature, it takes time to plant more good causes, and it takes time to bear good fruits. A child before the age of 3 comes here from another world. He is unfamiliar with everything around him, including his own body, which he cannot use. He first needs to bind a person as his mirror, in which he sees the world and himself. If the bonding relationship with the child is not done well at this time, the child will also look for someone to be bound to in interpersonal relationships when he grows up. Often, the child will choose the mother as that partner. This is why many mothers feel that they have lost themselves before their children are 3 years old, and that their hands and feet are tied and they have no freedom. But please firmly believe that this process is necessary for children and is also short-lived. Enjoy this time, give it enough, and your child will be able to separate from you well. What about financial education that determines a child’s lifelong happiness? You get along with him with love, joy, and infinite curiosity. This bond will be a warm time worth remembering in your life. Everything you do before the age of 3 cannot see the effect immediately. It is slowly released throughout your life. Some people may say after reading the previous article: \”It\’s not that serious. Many children in our community are taken care of by elderly nannies 24 hours a day. They are all sunny and healthy. Walk when it\’s time to walk, jump when it\’s time to dance Jump. I didn’t have any memory before I was 3 years old, and I didn’t learn anything. Anyway, my body is growing, so it doesn’t matter.” Well, I can’t convince you with the answer that you can see with the naked eye. Professional teachers can feel it based on their aura. The state of that child is indescribable. Education is about teaching how to be a person first and then how to do things. But the time of the former is far longer than that of the latter. In this impetuous era of quick success and quick success, we can\’t wait, and we don\’t know what it is to be called a human being. So we turn to things that are easier to see and teach children how toSome skills, show some talent. Our education has trained too many technical experts and too many machines that strive for honors, but few people have found their own mission and used their inner strength to complete the mission that goes deep into the soul and into the bone marrow. Before the age of 3 or 6, it is such a time when the results cannot be seen quickly, but it is extremely important to cultivate inner strength and flexible self. The main caregiver must have a very firm philosophy and understanding of education in order to be able to maintain it. Before the age of 3, children need physical sensations rather than thinking. Children before the age of 3 learn through pictures, and their development energy should be used in actions rather than thinking. This rule is very, very important for education in the current impatient Chinese society. This thinking is not what we usually understand as learning knowledge, it is broader. Including talking about big principles, talking about big principles formed by abstract words that the child cannot understand through his own experience. For example, \”There are additives in this thing. If you eat it, you will be ill.\” What are additives? Why not? These are things that a child cannot understand, and his first reaction after hearing this is to taste them. so what should I do now? Adults make decisions through actions, which is a sense of authority in the family. If the mother doesn\’t buy it, the children will naturally not be able to eat it. Education that talks about principles, education that uses violence to control children, and education that gives children unlimited freedom for fear of trouble are all the same. They are all lazy education, a kind of energy release that adults have no way of doing. I have seen too many children lose the courage to try new things. All he said was a set of truths: \”It\’s so dangerous\”, \”You\’ll catch a cold if you get water\”, \”Baby, good kids don\’t jump\”. Under the premise of ensuring that the child will not be seriously harmed, it is really important to allow the child to explore freely before the age of 3. Before the age of 3, what your child needs is your reliable love, not excessive material things. Walking on the street, I see children dressed more and more beautifully, and the toys in their hands are becoming more and more fashionable. But the voices I often hear in my ears are still \”I have this at home, but you don\’t\” and \”I asked my mother to buy one, hum.\” Human desires are the easiest to expand and arise, and the sooner they are satisfied, the easier it is to lose their sense of satisfaction. There is no end to satisfaction from external material things. What we see is that the more fully and naturally a child\’s inner love is received, the less he needs external things. Gifts from your mother can make up for your inner guilt, but they cannot replace the missing companionship and maternal love. On the contrary, family education that can control material matters, live with heart, and care for children with heart can best nourish the child\’s inner self. Reduce material giving and increase spiritual communication. Before the age of 3, children rely on their own strong ability to absorb and imitate to learn, and we have nowhere to hide. As the Chinese saying goes, children before the age of 3 have no memory. This also makes many people think that as long as the child is well taken care of before the age of 3, other children will not understand. If this is the case, nature\’s theory of evolution is too ridiculous. Three years of precious time have been wasted in vain. Are humans, as advanced animals, really such imbeciles? In fact, these three years have been the most magical time given by God to mankind.Baby, it is a super sensory organ, which gives us the ability to absorb and imitate. Have you discovered that children around two years old do not learn to speak immediately, but learn it through talking to themselves and repeated imitation every night. In the same way, children understand and learn other things in this way. What’s even more amazing is that when you want to take a break and push your child away, your child sticks to you even more, as if he understands your intention to push him away and doesn’t want to leave. I often advise stay-at-home mothers not to hire aunties. Our bodies are becoming increasingly lazy to move. This idle state will affect our children and make them too self-centered. If mothers have nothing to do, their children will call you \”Mom! Mom!\” to fill the boredom in your heart. And when the mother is really busy, tell the child what I am doing, you can wait for a while, or you can come and do it with me, the child will often agree. That\’s because children\’s powerful senses tap into who we are, not what we do. If you don\’t like something about the person who raises your child at home, try not to let him raise your child since he was a child, because sooner or later the child will probably have this too. If you don\’t like a certain trait in yourself, then work hard to improve on the basis of accepting yourself, otherwise you will inevitably see that your children will also acquire such traits. Before the age of 3, your child has the opportunity to become everything possible. All you need to do is: grow yourself. All education will be self-education. We cannot change others unless they want to change themselves. We can only provide moderate help and wait patiently. But what we can decide is ourselves, are we willing to change? Are we willing to put in the time and effort? Where are our lives going? Our growth is the cornerstone under our children’s feet. The child will stand on this stone and see further into his own life.