I believe that every parent has yelled at their children, got too angry with their children, and when we tried to change their children\’s thinking and get them to change their bad habits, we found that the children became more and more rebellious, and the parents also felt more and more resentful. The more powerless. Why do your children always mess with you? Maybe there\’s something wrong with your approach. Let us change our mood and talk to our children calmly. The effect may be completely different! Parents with high emotional intelligence often talk about these 8 sentences, let’s learn them together! Signs of high emotional intelligence: Training methods to improve emotional intelligence, Preschool Psychology Book Box 1. I feel… (emotion) because… Example: I feel very happy because your dad bought me a new skirt. Parents should express their emotions to their children more often. On the one hand, children can learn more emotional expressions and vocabulary from you. On the other hand, children are also encouraged to give reasons after expressing their emotions like parents, so that children can have a better understanding of their emotions. 2. Do you feel…(emotion)? Example: Are you feeling a little angry? Young children do not yet know how to express their emotions. Helping parents express their emotions is a great way to help their children understand and regulate their emotions. On the one hand, it allows children to better recognize and understand their own emotions. On the other hand, when a child has negative emotions, it can make the child feel understood and respected, and the negative emotions can be easily resolved. 3. Do you mean… (restate what the other person wants to express)? Example: Do you mean you really want to watch cartoons? Repeating your child\’s words can let your child know that you are paying attention to him or her and that you are not ignoring his or her demands. In this way, the child will no longer continue to \”harass\” relentlessly. More importantly, repeating children\’s words is a sign of empathy. Subtly, children can also learn to understand and repeat others\’ meanings and gain empathy. 4. I think you are a child of… (praise) because… (specific behavior) Example: I think you are a kind child because you gave up your seat to the old lady on the subway just now. Parents with high emotional intelligence often praise their children, which will make their children more confident. However, when praising children, focus on praising personality traits rather than praising talents. In addition, it is best to tell the specific behaviors and things so that the children know the reasons, so as to have a positive reinforcement effect. Otherwise, the children will feel confused and not understand what is good about them. 5. I think you are a very hard-working child. Example: I think you are a very hard-working child. You can try other methods next time you have the opportunity. When children are still young, many things cannot be done well. One principle of parents with high emotional intelligence is to praise based on facts. If the child does not complete something, but the parents praise it against their will, it will not deceive the child for long, but will make the child feel that the parents are not sincere. Therefore, when a child works hard but fails to do something well, we can praise his or her efforts so that he or she will be less frustrated and motivated to continue to improve. 6. It will be dangerous to do this. Mom is very worried about you, so you… (the right thing to do), okay?Example: It will be dangerous if you do this, and your mother will be very worried about you, so you must hold your mother\’s hand when crossing the road in the future, okay? When their children make some dangerous moves, parents will become furious because they are afraid that something will really happen to their children. They often criticize very harshly, \”Are you sick? You are not allowed to do this\” or \”You can\’t do this, it is too dangerous.\” Saying this often does not work well. Some children have serious rebellious psychology, some children will be frightened, and some children will become more curious and want to try after you stop them. Therefore, when reminding children of danger, the most important message to convey is: This is all because dad/mom cares about your safety, rather than blaming you. In addition, don’t just stop your child’s current behavior, but provide him with appropriate suggestions. 7. I hope you… (correct approach) because… Example: Mom hopes you can be quiet, because this is the library, a place where everyone can read quietly. When parents with high emotional intelligence criticize their children\’s inappropriate behavior, they often do not stop it by saying \”no\”. A more appropriate approach is to say what changes you want your child to make so that he or she can make progress, rather than just constantly blaming wrong behavior. It is important to state the reasons why you want him to change, so that the child can truly be \”convinced\”. 8. Do you want… (option 1), or… (option 2)? Example: Do you want to go to the zoo or the science and technology museum this weekend? Sometimes, we like to help our children make decisions, and at most we will ask: \”Do you want…\”. Parents with high emotional intelligence will let their children do multiple-choice questions, giving them the right to make their own choices, and cultivating their children\’s ability to think independently. In addition, when we simply ask children if they want something, they can easily refuse. But when making a choice, they will often choose one of them. You can set the options cleverly so that no matter what the child chooses, it is the right one. Okay, today’s content is shared with you here, I hope it will be helpful to everyone.