There is such a movie about children\’s education that every parent should watch. The movie is called \”Girl Genius\”. The protagonist of the story, Mary, is a 7-year-old child. Her deceased mother was a genius mathematician. Mary also inherited her mother\’s genes and had amazing mathematical talents at a young age. After Mary\’s mother died, Mary was adopted by her uncle Frank. Although Mary has extraordinary talents, Uncle Frank just wants Mary to live an ordinary life and be a child who can play happily with her friends – this is also Mary\’s mother\’s last wish. But Mary\’s grandmother didn\’t think so. After learning about Mary\’s mathematical talent, her grandmother approached Frank and said that she had money and could help Mary go to a good school and give her a better life. Moreover, Mary’s mother was unable to solve the mathematical equations during her lifetime. Grandma hoped that her granddaughter could succeed her mother in solving the world’s problems. The two had huge differences in educational concepts, and neither one was willing to give in, so they had to leave it to the court to decide who should have custody of Mary. Unfortunately, Frank gradually became at a disadvantage. Seeing that there was no way out, Frank took out Mary\’s mother\’s relics, which were a pile of draft notes that recorded the process of Mary\’s mother solving the world\’s mathematical problems, as well as her tears. Grandma originally thought that her daughter had died before she could solve the mathematical equation, but the truth was that Mary\’s mother had already solved it, but hid it and asked that it be made public only after her mother\’s death, because she didn\’t want her mother to get her wish. It turns out that Mary\’s mother has been living under the high-pressure control of her grandmother. Her grandmother only wanted to train Mary\’s mother to become a mathematical genius, forcing her to study mathematics and never allowing her to participate in any recreational activities. On days like this, Mary\’s mother had never felt relaxed and happy. Even today, many years later, grandma\’s overbearing education model for Mary is exactly the same as then. In the end, Mary\’s mother couldn\’t bear it and chose to commit suicide. This also explains why Mary\’s mother does not want her daughter to become a genius, but only wants Mary to be happy. At the end of the story, Mary\’s custody was given to her uncle Frank. Under Frank\’s care, Mary could learn mathematics freely, and more importantly, she could spend a happy childhood. The most impressive scene in the movie is when the lawyer suggested that Frank entrust Mary to a foster family first. Due to the unfavorable situation, Frank had no choice but to do so. When Mary learned that she would live with a foster family, she cried and grabbed her uncle and refused to let him go. But after a while, when Frank wanted to come and take Mary back, Mary was not happy at all when she saw her uncle coming, and turned around and left. Frank chased after her, and soon Mary began to cry loudly, beating her uncle, crying why he didn\’t want her, and that he promised not to leave her. Mary in this scene is really heart-wrenching. In the final analysis, what every child needs most is love. People have countless opinions and arguments about loving children. What is the true love for children? The brilliance of this movie is that it tells a question that many parents struggle with: when growing up, is it more important for children to be happy or to learn? ifIf you want your children to have a happy childhood, some people may worry that their children will be left behind by their peers and miss the opportunity to learn; if you want your children to focus on their studies, some may say that their children\’s lives are too depressing, and they may even gain Results have lost their freedom. But in fact, many parents have misunderstood one thing. Happiness does not mean that if children are indulged, they will not learn anything. Learning does not mean that forcing children will lose their happiness. What you need to do to balance the two is to give your children the right to choose. Children are young and their lack of experience may cause them to take detours or make wrong decisions. So some parents will help them make choices, while some parents often fail to consider their children\’s thoughts when making choices. This is why some children learn unhappy. You just tell your child to learn this, but don\’t discuss it with him. If the child doesn\’t understand why he wants to learn, then his learning will be unmotivated, and he will feel that he is just obeying his parents\’ requirements. Why should we obey the request? I don’t know, and then there is reluctance. When a child is young, it makes sense for parents to help him make choices, but as the child grows older, he begins to have his own ideas. If you blindly ignore his ideas, it will be counterproductive. The child will either become rebellious or weak. As children grow up, the role of parents gradually becomes more of a counselor rather than a decision-maker. Especially when it comes to small things (such as buying clothes, ordering food, etc.), you should slowly let your children learn and think about how to take responsibility for themselves. In this process, you can help your child analyze the possibilities of different choices, avoid detours, and then give him the right to choose. You can ask your child to discuss it with you, but you cannot ask him to do what you say. Many times children don’t understand. They think they are not wrong, so why can’t they do this? ——This is how they feel. Blindly arranging everything not only deprives children of their rights, but also ignores their feelings. Such parents actually satisfy themselves. And once something is done with the shell of \”for the children\”, the matter becomes impeccable, and the children are unable to refute, and even the children\’s incomprehension will make the parents feel how well-intentioned they are. This approach is actually touching oneself. Just like the grandmother in the movie, the reason for training her daughter to become a genius mathematician is not for her daughter\’s benefit at all, but for fame and fortune (the title of a genius mathematician\’s mother). Package your selfish desires as \”good for your children\” and instill your own needs into your children. Even to Mary, did she love Mary? No, she fought for Mary\’s custody and provided her with better living conditions entirely because she wanted her to become the next mathematical genius. Since her daughter committed suicide and her plan failed, she used her granddaughter to fill the vacancy. Wu Zhihong said in \”Why Family Hurts People\”: \”Doting parents who dote not only deprive their children of opportunities for self-exploration, but in fact, they often turn a blind eye to their children\’s true feelings. They are used to projecting their own feelings onto The child thinks that it is the child\’s true feelings.\” The consequence of this is that the child will become distrustful and suspicious of himself.own abilities, and even lose oneself. In the movie, Mary\’s mother ended her life, but in reality, how many children became anxious, sensitive, and cautious because of this… I used to have a classmate who was a very kind and sensible girl. According to family members, he is the kind of good boy in the eyes of his elders. I also think she has a pleasant and well-behaved personality, but gradually I feel that this kind of well-behavedness has unhealthy elements. Her mother is a person with a relatively strong personality, and she is the youngest daughter in the family and is very favored. In her twenties, she had to ask her parents first before making many decisions, and even the style of clothes she wanted to buy had to be approved by her mother. Such obedience comes at the expense of some independence. Some parents feel that their children are very obedient to them and do everything according to them. They are raising their children to be \”mom\’s babies\” but are unaware of it and are even proud of it. This is terrible. Are you loving your children or harming them? It depends on whether you regard your child as an independent individual or an accessory to your own life. True love for children should be based on respecting the child\’s personality, rather than being dominated by one\’s own wishes.