What should I do if my child is addicted to mobile phones?

The most troublesome issue for parents all over the world is how to manage their children\’s use of mobile phones, tablets and other electronic products. I am afraid it is one of the most troublesome issues for all parents right now. Both of my kids were late to the “call” on cell phones. Perhaps because they have been able to play together since they were young, and we do as many activities as possible with them, mobile phones and tablets are not particularly important items in their lives. But as they go to school and get higher grades, I find it becomes more and more unavoidable. First, most of the students around me had mobile phones in the third and fourth grades, so they would naturally be envious and want to have their own mobile phones; second, some things must be done online, and it would be very inconvenient not to have a mobile phone or tablet. I remember that one semester, Qian Qian took an English drama class. She had to participate in group performances and often had to practice her lines with her classmates. One weekend our family went camping in the mountains. While we were busy setting up tents and setting up tables, Qian Qian asked to borrow her mother\’s cell phone to communicate with her classmates. At that time, my mother joked that she was almost becoming her daughter’s secretary, because her daughter had to pass things to the teacher, and to her classmates, and she also had to make appointments with certain classmates for the next week. These children don\’t like to make phone calls and prefer to communicate through chat software. When Qian Qian graduated from elementary school, several classmates took the lead in creating a chat group called \”Innocent, Lively and Cute Sixth Grade\”. Slowly, all the students in the class were included in it. We discussed which school to go to in the future, where to go on graduation trips, how to make a graduation yearbook, and even arranged to play ball together. This is the real social life of children. It is hard to imagine what else they will use besides mobile phones to achieve instant communication with classmates. What’s even more unimaginable is how strong the feeling of isolation and loneliness will be if the child is not in this group. Later, I successively equipped the children with mobile phones and tablets, and held several family meetings to discuss how to use these electronic devices correctly. CCTV recommends over 500 excellent documentaries with high scores. After watching it, the children are addicted to self-discipline. The family is sitting on both sides of the dining table. The adults use computers and the children use tablets. While everyone is discussing, they use shared documents to record each other. Opinions, particularly formal. In the final analysis, I think the relationship between children and mobile phones and tablets is not only about the needs of life and study, but more importantly, how they use self-control to resist temptation and achieve self-discipline when faced with an addictive thing. Today, its name is a mobile phone or tablet, and tomorrow it may be AI intelligence or the metaverse. We cannot always stay by our children\’s side to help them identify and block them. There will definitely come a day when our children will refuse our interference in their affairs. Therefore, from the day a child asks for a mobile phone, we have to realize that the \”war\” with the child\’s attention has begun. The only way to win is to let the child use it while managing and guiding it. Establish enough self-control and a correct understanding of these \”external things\”. How to deal with the challenges of the smart era. Dealing with the challenges of the smart era involves many aspects, such as parents’ psychological support, an environment conducive to children’s concentration, control of electronic products, and some physiological aspects of the children themselves.development etc. Of course it is not easy, and parents all over the world are having a headache about this, but there is no way. This is the challenge that the smart era poses to parents. Here, I also share some methods that I find effective for your reference. First, clarify with your children the rules for using electronic products. There must be a reason for a child to want to use or own electronic products. Parents must first confirm this reason with their child and agree on some situations related to it. For example, my son Chuanchuan asked for a tablet before. Because sometimes he checked information or took online classes, he usually used my tablet. Later, the frequency became more and more frequent, and he and I felt it was a bit inconvenient, so we decided to use it again. Buy one and let him use the new one instead of taking over my old one to show that I recognize and value this matter. The day we got the new tablet, we signed a tablet usage contract, which includes the ownership of the tablet, what it is mainly used for, who is responsible for keeping it, how to use it in daily life, what punishment will be imposed if there is a breach of contract, etc. We discussed each item carefully and wrote it down after reaching a consensus. Finally, it filled up an entire A4 paper. The reason for making it so pretentious is that on the one hand, I want to make some confirmation on his usage and know what he is going to use it for. On the other hand, we also help him make some plans and precautions. For example, he must stop and rest for at least 30 seconds every half hour of use; do not reply to unfamiliar messages online, etc. If children are not told these things in advance, there may be hidden dangers that parents cannot see. More importantly, it is confirmed in the form of a contract and signed by both father and son. This is a very formal commitment and will help the children take the matter seriously. When he breaks the contract, he will accept the punishment more willingly. The contract is still hidden under a plastic board on his son\’s desk, where he can see it at any time. During the implementation process, of course, there will inevitably be breaches of contract, but overall, the main goals set have been achieved well. Secondly, let children understand some secrets of smart devices. Sometimes you will find that you can’t stop watching your phone and watch short videos all morning. This is because many online platforms and mobile apps have adopted the so-called “addictive” mechanism to attract users to stay longer. Stay. Children\’s self-control is far less than that of adults, so they are more likely to indulge in it. When my children are using electronic devices, I will take the opportunity to explain some of the principles behind them. For example, when watching an episode on a video website, why does the small icon for playing the next episode start to rotate before the previous episode ends? Why does the new reminder in the chat app use red dots? Why can I always refresh the page I want? I can’t finish the information I read… I will explain to them some of the principles behind it, such as how high-tech companies in Silicon Valley hire a lot of experts in brain science and psychology to take advantage of some of people’s physiological characteristics and brain patterns. , specially designed to “hook” you. Every time they talked about this, their eyes widened, their mouths were half-opened, and they looked surprised, as if they were caged rabbits used for experiments. When they understand the mechanism behind it, they can actually better understand their relationship with products such as mobile phones. When they find that they stay on their mobile phones for too long,, will immediately realize what happened. I can’t say that this makes children wary of the Internet, but it does help them proactively prevent addiction and develop self-discipline. Finally, replace online time with quality family time. In addition to studying and socializing, children also spend a considerable part of their time using electronic products for entertainment. Since this part of time is inevitable, parents can find ways to turn it into higher quality time. We often help our children collect some high-quality popular science and humanities programs, and the whole family watches and discusses them together. There is a science channel that our whole family likes very much. The bloggers always have some weird ideas and use various ingenious designs to solve problems that children are interested in. Once he had a sudden idea to make a robot that was the best at making mistakes. There are many problems to be solved here, such as what kind of water floats, what conditions the water surface must meet, what angle should be used to throw stones, what kind of robot should be made, etc. The blogger recorded the entire production process and turned it into a super interesting popular science film. Chuan Chuan particularly liked this science blogger and included the blogger\’s story in his English speech. In fact, in addition to the temptations and spam that parents are worried about, there is also a lot of high-quality content on the Internet. Many parent-child education bloggers will compile and share these must-see lists. As long as we spend a little time searching, we can help our children build a great online knowledge base. Just like a piece of land, when you plant it with flowers, the space for weeds to live becomes smaller. When you use high-quality Internet time instead of low-quality, worrying Internet time, electronic products will become a boost to children\’s growth, and parents will naturally feel less anxious. Of course, parents should lead by example. They should not just ask their children, but also use less mobile phones in family life, play less games and binge-watch TV shows, and spend more time with their children. Good parent-child interaction is definitely the only way to reduce children\’s dependence on mobile phones and enhance children\’s psychological quality in all aspects. [The most complete and best sound quality in history] 32 sets of 100 must-listen late-pregnancy music for free. In the past decade or so, we have witnessed the subversion of life by smart devices and the Internet. As natives of the Internet, children must be more involved than us. Deeper. Whether they are completing levels in the game world, socializing on the Internet, or purchasing virtual products, the emotions and preferences they invest, and the success, frustration, joy, anger, sorrow, and joy they experience may be more real and profound than we imagine. Therefore, we need to face it with a more open mind. Instead of treating mobile phones and tablets as scourges, we should understand, explore and experience them with our children, because this is an irresistible trend and is also a part of children\’s growth.

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