When I was a kid, they said: study hard and you can get everything if you work hard. They said: Don\’t worry about things that have nothing to do with studying. Just study hard and we won\’t do the messy stuff. They said: Don\’t cause trouble, don\’t show off, the leader will die first. They said: You are still young now. If you want to play, you will have plenty of opportunities to play. When you grow up, you can play whatever you want. They say: As long as you study hard, you will get good grades. If you have good grades, you will have a good job. If you have a good job, you will earn a lot of money. Then you can buy whatever you want. They said: Be obedient! If we don\’t obey, we will get angry and we will get sick. Obedient children are good children. Otherwise we would be so angry that it would be your fault. How obedient I am. How afraid I am of being the one who kills my parents! So, I put all my energy into studying. I studied hard just to make my parents happy. I like exams and rankings the most. Later, I went to college. Dad said: You are a student, and the student\’s task is to study. Apart from studying, these are the things you shouldn\’t worry about. It\’s useless to participate in those messy activities. You have to study more to be useful when you enter the workplace. Mom said: Yes, yes. They said: Don\’t participate in any activities or anything like that. You still want to work as a tutor. It\’s not safe to reveal your name and phone number like this. I dubiously tore up the notice I had written about being a tutor. I met a boy, and they said: What kind of love is this? My current love life is fruitless and my studies are delayed. We stopped contacting each other. Dad said: Girls should not worry about food, clothing and grooming. Simplicity is the best. I said: I just put on lipstick, everyone is like that. Mom said: Yes, yes, girls in their 10s and 20s look best without makeup, so don’t wear lipstick. They will say together tomorrow: Look at so-and-so’s hair, how beautiful their hair is, why don’t you look like this? They said to me at the dinner table: Eat meat! They said under the dinner table: Look at you, it is not good for a girl to be too fat. Sometimes I was confused, sometimes aggrieved, and I grew up like this. When I entered the workplace, I found that the world was so far away from me. Everything is different from school, everything is not what I thought it was. I work hard, I study hard, and I respect my seniors with utmost respect. So everyone said that I was very honest. When I encounter something that I haven\’t explained before, I don\’t know what to do. Others ask me to go play, but I don’t go. When boys chase me, I instinctively refuse. When someone introduced me to someone, I said: I need to go home and ask my parents. People say that I am good at work, but I don’t play with others. I really want to play, but I have to take a test, I have to study, and I have to improve myself. Mom and Dad said: Only by improving your academic qualifications and standards will you have opportunities. I took many certificates and spent a lot of energy and time. I read a lot of books and found that I have been living a different life than what I read in the books. Others say: You are just like your dad. Your dad doesn\’t like to talk, and you don\’t like to talk either. He didn’t say that, like my dad, I am not good at communication, I get nervous when meeting leaders, I am most afraid of dealing with superiors, and I hide away when I see the opposite sex; like my dad, I am honest and hard-working, I only know how to do things, but I don’t knowLook for opportunities; like my father, if there is anything to do, he will do it by himself without considering the gain or loss, and without giving him any money. I feel like a carbon copy of my dad. But in society, people like my dad seem to have fewer and fewer opportunities. Everyone knows how to market themselves, promote themselves, and let the world know about their talents. At this point, I thought: I won’t do those messy things. Later, I lived a very ordinary life, not living up to my parents’ expectations and becoming their pride. My brilliance in school never showed up at work. I am very serious about my business. I never cause trouble. I listen to my boss and my master. I am not afraid of hardship and am very diligent. I took many certificates. But I\’m just afraid of dealing with people, and I\’ll be at a loss if I encounter something that I haven\’t explained. I really don\’t know what to do, no one told me. When I went home and asked my parents, they said that these are my own affairs and I should make my own decisions. What? up to you? Oh God, don\’t let me decide for myself, you decide for me! I do not know what to do! They say: I worry about these little things myself, I have grown up. But yesterday they were still taking care of all my affairs, so why don\’t they take care of me today? what do I do? I have lived up to today in compliance with all the requirements they said. Why is the world not what they said it is? Why don\’t they care about me now? Dad said: It’s all your fault for not working hard. I cried loudly and asked: Where did I fail to work hard? Am I not working hard or studying hard? They had nothing to say, and mom followed up and said: You should work harder! I really don\’t know what to do. You say: Did they lie to me?
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