When a child with separation anxiety goes to kindergarten, how does the day go?

Dear friends, since I became a kindergarten teacher, I know what your biggest concern is – \”I send a child with separation anxiety to kindergarten. How did he get through the day? What happened in the kindergarten?\” Many kindergartens are There is a camera, but the camera is mounted high and cannot clearly see the child\’s expression. And the cameras are silent, so you can\’t hear what the children are saying. Another thing is: the cameras have blind spots, and you can’t see everything the child does. Therefore, many mothers look at their children who have just entered kindergarten with an anxious attitude: When I left my child in the morning, he was still crying so much? How is he doing in kindergarten? After I became a kindergarten teacher, during the peak of the enrollment season in August and September, I could pick up several new children every day. Feeling like I have learned from my experience, I will tell you in detail what a day in the life of a child is like. When you are with me, your child cries the most. The truth that surprises many mothers is that when you are with me, your child cries at its peak. After you left, things got much better. As mentioned before, Sue, a little girl with high emotional intelligence in our class (for details, please see \”Parents or the elderly, can the kindergarten teacher tell it at a glance? Two short stories explain everything\”), she first came to the kindergarten in the first few months. Here, every morning when I say goodbye to my mother, I burst into tears. My little hands must hold the corner of my mother\’s clothes. The countdown on my phone rang several times and my mother can\’t leave. The child cries like a pear blossom with rain and tears staining her lapel. ! When I first became a teacher, I had no experience in dealing with it, so I was scared. I hugged Sue’s little arms and said goodbye to her mother, and then I hugged Sue again, for fear that Sue would burst into tears. Finally, my mother finally left. It was strange. It happened. Sue stopped crying within 5 seconds, and it was like a rainstorm suddenly turning into a sunny day. She held my hand and said, \”Teacher, can I still play with that red tricycle? Don\’t forget to help me.\” I\’m looking for a gas station.\” I\’ll go, I dare you to leave the most miserable part of crying to your mother, so that your mother can spend a restless day! There is a boy in our class, Lee, and her grandma loves her grandson Ru Ming. Fei said, \”Teacher, I don\’t believe what you said. It\’s so pitiful for a child to cry in the kindergarten. I have to hide it secretly to see how the child behaves. Otherwise, I won\’t feel at ease.\” After her grandson burst into tears, the old man said she was leaving. , In fact, she didn’t leave. The old lady was so caught up in the drama that she actually hid in the small toilet on the outdoor terrace, looking at her grandson through the cracks. Then she saw a magical scene: the child cried for less than half a minute in total, and acted as if nothing had happened. We started playing on the elevated structure. Everything was normal. The old lady was finally relieved and prepared to slip away. But her grandson spotted her and said, \”Wow! Wow! Wow! Wow!\” and started crying again. Why even children with separation anxiety, Is the level of crying much better after the family leaves than when the family is there? Because the child actually has a strong ability to adapt, but if the mother is there, he thinks that crying will make the mother stay. So half of the children cry to vent their emotions. , half of it was crying as a means to save her. This kind of crying is difficult to stop. But after my mother left,, he knew it was useless to cry. It is easy to stop crying due to pure emotion. Once he is attracted by a new toy, his attention will be diverted immediately and he will stop crying very quickly. So I must remind all mothers: the truth is much more optimistic than you think. Children are more resilient than you think. Children cry less in kindergarten than you worry about. You send your children to kindergarten. Once you decide to leave, leave quickly and don\’t look back. If it is the first time for a child to enter the kindergarten, the child will cry for a while after you leave, but the teacher will help him. Generally, kindergartens are basically like this: for children who don’t cry very seriously, we will give them a variety of fun toys that they have never seen at home. If a child cries particularly hard, a teacher will hold him and coax him, and if necessary, arrange for a separate person to accompany him through this special period. After a while, the child will calm down again. Some extroverted children will quickly integrate into the new environment, but most children will not. They must be alone for a while. Or playing with toys or watching others play, but they were not idle during this time. They are using the keen insight of young children to see which teacher is more approachable, so as to decide who is reliable to turn to when they pee their pants; they are looking at which toys they like, and wondering if they can go there and play with it; They were looking to see which big sister could play with them, and the bold children were already approaching them. Occasionally, my emotions will come up, and I will cry a lot. But the calm time will be longer and longer. It will be more difficult at noon, because it is a difficult time for children when they face problems with peeing and eating. Because there are three treasures at noon: not eating, not being able to pee, and not sleeping. (Oh, noon is also the most tiring time for us teachers, isn’t it?) First, let’s talk about not eating: it also takes time for children to adapt to kindergarten meals, especially for sensitive and picky children. The child gets emotional while eating and cries when he thinks of his mother. Let’s talk about not knowing how to use the toilet: A considerable proportion of children cannot use the toilet on their own when they enter kindergarten at the age of 3 and need help from teachers. If you wet your urine and have a smelly stool and don\’t know how to change it, you have to cry a lot. Finally, skipping a nap: This is the easiest thing to cry about. I was used to being coaxed to sleep by my mother, but now I was in a new environment, and my eyesight went dark, surrounded by unknown children, and it was easy to cry before going to bed. However, many children fall asleep a little deeper when they are tired from crying. There is no shortcut to solving emotional problems at noon. It just depends on time to gradually become familiar with and adapt to it. Mothers must once again believe in their children\’s natural and strong adaptability. After a while, it will be no big deal if they are trained in kindergarten. However, there is still a lot that mothers can do, just six months to a month before you send your child to kindergarten. The more mothers do this, the less their children will cry, the faster they will adapt, and the more comfortable they will be in kindergarten. First of all, mothers try to let their children learn to eat, drink, and serve dishes by themselves. In order to train children\’s self-care ability, good kindergartens have to clear their own plates. If a child is served at home and eats in a paralyzed posture, what should he do after eating?Regardless, you will definitely feel a strong sense of discomfort when entering kindergarten. In order for the children to cry less, they should learn to take care of themselves early! Secondly, try to let your children learn to use the toilet on their own. If you still can\’t, let your child learn to take off his pants by himself. The worst thing is that the child must learn to express \”I want to pee\” to others! Don\’t laugh, some children are really cared for so well, and their needs are met so thoughtfully, that their mother or grandma will listen to their words and help them do it without even opening their mouths to say anything. There is a child like this in our class. She is almost 3 and a half years old. Her language skills are very poor. She wants to pee but is too lazy to tell the teacher. She just sits down and pees on her pants, waiting for the teacher to change her. She is also drunk. Finally, try to allow the child to try to fall asleep on his own. It’s okay to hold and pat the child to sleep, but leave a short period of time before bed to see if the child can fall asleep without being patted or coaxed. Your child can\’t sleep without you. He must learn how to adapt to sleeping in other environments. Your meticulous doting is harming the child. Finally, when you came to pick me up, you also had a small peak of crying, but this varies from person to person. Some children forget all the worldly things when they see their mother, and happily follow their mother home. But more children will turn their accumulated discomfort into emotions and cry to you after meeting their mother in the first few days of entering the kindergarten. It\’s good for the mother to comfort the child at this time. For details, please refer to this article \”Crying!\” When a child \”doesn\’t want his mother\”, the truth behind it is actually this…\” Well, these are the details you want to know about your child\’s first day in kindergarten! My feeling after being in contact with children for a long time is that we all underestimate the child\’s understanding and adaptability. In fact, this little person is learning life in a new environment very quickly. His crying is not that he is not living a good life, but that he is not living a good life. An emotional release. Keep sending your children to kindergarten and you will see more and more positive changes in your children.